Welcome to the group! There is a lot of wisdom here. This is my first week but it has helped me out tremendously. I start my day here and I end my day here. It keeps me rooted in recovery when I’m not at a meeting and if I’m going to be fiddling with my phone, it is waaaayyy safer than just aimlessly browsing the internet pretending like I’m not looking for triggers.
Keep coming back!
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Welcome to the forum!
@Cgty04 @Bomdhil @SmokeyMirror So, I know that you guys have poured a lot of time into the Sex, Porn, Masturbation Addiction threads, because naturally that’s your DOC. However, I think you guys would find an incredible amount of support within the other threads. The others may have different addictions than us, but addiction is addiction. I have learned so much about maintaining sobriety and gaining internal perspective by speaking with those of different addictions.
Check in daily on the check in thread. Join us running on the Strava thread. Joke with us on the meme’s thread. Discuss your health goals with us on the exercise threads.
There is so much more to sobriety than just white knuckling until you relapse. Starting a new sober life should be a reformatting of your life as you know it. Leave bad influences behind. Take your physical health seriously through nutrition and exercise. Work with your higher power. Make new friends who will support and lift you up.
What do you guys think?
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Yes, that is absolutely a directive advice. We need to hear you. I believe that I have built the basic of my new mindset and I am looking forward to carrying it out. I have already made lots of comments on others’ threads that is not related to our addiction. Anyway, I support What you have said.
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Absolutely. Thank you for the welcome! I agree there is simply not enough about my main addiction on here to spend much time on. I come here every morning and read and post in other threads. After work I’m on here for hours sometimes reading through old threads( there’s a lot) and finding my way around. What is Strava? What is your program of choice? Would you be willing to share your story with me? I have posted a lil bit of my story but is there anything you would like to know about me?
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Thank you for the kindness. I’ll take the advice and check out the other threads. So far I have deleted my internet browser from my phone since I seem to use it more as a hindrance than a help. I’m also going out more and making sure I do not have as much down time. The advice is very much appreciated. I hope you all have a successful and great morning
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Actually it is the main problem to get over the first week exhaustion. Just stick with it. You can. Not motivating, really you can😊
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You are right. I also have to start believing in myself
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Thanks for sharing.Today all your posts helped me to wish to be better
Strava is a running/cycling app. Theres a lot of us that use it on here.
My story is not that impressive. Just started with heavy lust problems as a youth. I began masturbating habitually while serving as a missionary. Complete abstinence and no contact with girls was extremely difficult for the 2 years I served on my mission. Made it almost the whole time without acting out.
After my mission I got a laptop for college and it only took a short amount of time before I was a full blown porn addict. I had a brief stint of sobriety when my wife and I were engaged. Made it 4 and a half months into our marriage before I was back into the addiction heavily. About 9 months later the bishop of my church told me I was an addict. Something I’d never confronted before. I knew I had a problem, just never labeled it as an addiction. Went to a 12 step program for another 9 months. Made it through those 9 months sober before I relapsed again.
Then until now, almost 8 years later, I’d make it a month or two without using. Since I joined the forum, I feel different. I’m actually confronting the addiction, instead of ignoring it until it grabs me.
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I feel different. I’m actually confronting the addiction, instead of ignoring it until it grabs me.
This is exactly how I feel.
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@DungeonMaster thank you for sharing your experience. I want to share mine too.
I am dealing with porn and masturbation since I was 13 years old. Now I am 42. The longest streak had been 1 year.
More than once I lived one year sober but this las five years are very hard for me.
I am single . I have had girlfriends but I never had sexual intercourse. I try to follow my religion and I try to live a chaste life but my addiction makes that really painful. I feel being a hypocrite and a double face. Here in the forum and in Rtribe app I feel understood and encouraged to be completely free.
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By the way I start to read the eye of the world. I am really enjoying it!!!
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It’s nothing until you get to the end. The ending is amazing!
Thanks for sharing. It’s been tough in recovery. Being married and having regular sex has not been any help or deterrant to consuming porn. I feel that I have a lot to lose because I have 4 boys and another boy due in a couple weeks. I could lose everything if my wife gets sick of the addiction and me.
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I pray for you!!! What a big family!!! God bless you!! My brother is married and has 6 children.
Your wife must be very good knowing your addiction and helping you.
In your last experience you said that you have been missionary. I am interested to know. I try to follow Jesus and spread His Word but I see this weakness of mine…at the same time I know He is good to me.
I am really interested in how do you live your faith
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I belong to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Some people call us Mormons. Most 18 year old young men in my church go out on 2 year missions to random parts if the world. I served in Washington DC. I had two brothers serve, one in Lima, Peru, and another in Quezon City, Philippines. My best friend served in Seoul, South Korea.
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Hey guys, it’s been awhile, but I’m trying to be more regular in my visits even though I may not post as much. So I recently relapsed on masturbation, but not porn. Usually they go hand in hand. So I decided I should make two labels on the app,cuz if I didn’t relapse in one why should I restart counting the time? I’m saying that here because my accountability partner and the other person I’d talk to about this are M.I.A. and I feel it helps to share.
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@DungeonMaster thanks for the answer. I know a little bit of Mormons but not too much. You will laught but I know them through the books of Dragonlance.
I am catholic. It is wonderful the wish to spread the good News. I don’t really know how I will be without faith.
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Whatever works for you. There are some people who have to separate their behaviors and work on them one at a time because it is too difficult to stop them all at once or the behavior is seriously detrimental to their well being or could land them in prison. Then when they have a handle on that they start to work through the other behaviors. This is usually discussed and agreed upon with a sponsor or a trusted accountability partner beforehand and when changes are to be made they discuss it as well. This step is important because the addict is a liar and can convince us that a slip is not a slip because X,Y,Z… for me, if I am not sober I am not sober. I have listened to the addict and justified this and that for too long. I have to live by the mantra: It is better to be hated for the person you are than loved for the person you are not.
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First, it’s up to you and you alone on how to determine your sobriety date(s).
That being said, I worry that it could become a slippery slope. You masterbated without porn. You crossed a boundary you had set. I imagine you still got a dump of endorphins to your brain. So, now you’ve got two sobriety clocks. If I did this, I would continue to masterbate without porn. Pretty soon I would be looking at pictures and videos that aren’t technically porn because masterbating to crap in my imagination wouldn’t be enough anymore. Eventually I would go back to porn and I’d be resetting both clocks anyway.
I think we put a lot of stock in a date. In reality that date doesn’t matter at all (either way, reset or not), the world keeps on turning. This is why when we give chips out at meetings we talk about the 24 hour chip being the most important one. Today is all that matters.
All that to say, if it helps you to see the clock continuing to build the time you’ve been without porn, then you’re doing the right thing. But if it becomes an excuse to masterbate without porn, then maybe it’s not a good idea. Only you will know the answer.
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