I want a drink so bad…pretty much the whole past month i feel like i need it. Work is hard …i need it. My husbands new bff is a hott chick that wants him… i need it. My kid yells at me… i need it. Im just so sad and confused i want a drink so bad
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Emily, Play that tape all the way through to the end. If you have one drink, where will it lead? Nothing good will come of it. I get it, a drink will relieve those feelings but it’s only a temporary fix and all those feelings will come back ten fold. What helps me is gratitude. Thinking about gratitude will overpower the negative thoughts.
This would concern me. Wtf?! How would your husband feel if this were reversed and your new bff was a hot guy? Boundaries are being crossed here in my opinion.
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I hear all these rationalizations about drinking but…
Why do you want to stay sober?
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A drink definitely won’t make those challenges go away. It’ll only stack on something else to worry about. Maybe focus on tackling the things bothering you and try to eliminate them instead of introducing something that’ll make you feel even worse in the long run.
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He doesn’t see the problem she makes him feel better
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Bc i dont wanna die a slow death and i dont enjoy the insane anxiety
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Emily! It’s good you are reaching out instead of reaching for a drink. To me, that means your inner wise voice is winning, NOT the alcohol wolf who is knocking on your mind’s door. Stay strong, don’t let that wolf in, even though you’re dealing with some shit right now. You are here, we are with you, giving you support. Breathe….
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Im trying…
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Are you hungry, angry, lonely, tired? Can you take a hot shower? A walk? Go to bed early? If you can get past these cravings you will feel so proud and your sober muscle will get stronger
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I have been getting past them but they keep coming back
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Is there a particular trigger you are noticing?
Just stress and depression
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I can relate. I book regular appointments with a therapist to vent and get an outside perspective. Also highly recommend Insight timer meditations. Its hard to just focus on breath and clear your mind. It takes practice. But i really like a guided meditation to ground me in times of stress
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Have you confronted your husband and child about their actions that are triggering you?
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It makes sense that we yearn to drink…its how we dealt with life. As your sober days add up, you will find different ways, healthy ways to deal with the crap life throws at you.
It was a wonderful thing, coming on here and talking about it. Keep telling those cravings “No!”
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I get you but in a healthy relationship there is no need to be scared of hot friends. If her bfs new bff was an ugly chick, would it be okay? I mean it’s understandable that she’s concerned if she knows that woman wants her man, but even then with enough trust there will be no need to do anything. And even if her man and that woman get together that’s the way of life, you cannot keep your partner away from new friendships. When my gf tried to keep hot friends away from me I felt like this was crossing boundaries and I realized trust was missing.
Good for you reaching out. It sounds like stress and the pressure is really tightening on you. When that crunch is on us, it can feel there is no way out. I get it, and it sounds like a lot of other peopke do here also.
I know there have been a few back and fprth comments regarding the husband and his new bff. A marriage or partnership between two people is about what works for you guys. No one elses opinion really matters hor even their thpughts about what should or shouldnt make you comfortable or be allowed (of couese there is abuse and sometimes those closest to us have insights that we cant see, but what I am talking about is how two people come to define the relationship together). A relationship between two individuals is about how those two peopke define it for themselves and eachother together. If this bothers you, it does. Whether anyone else feels thats right or wrong doesnt matter. You are in a vulnerable space right now, clearly and even if the new bff is good looking the fact that you can see flirtations and state that she seems attracted him is crossing a boundary for you. The attractiveness is not an issue, the behavior to me would be an issue thought. Its not just about trust - you can trust your partner while not trustong the other individual; its about respect - you cannot necessarily trust if the other indovidual has respecr for you or your marriage, and really this is not the issue the issue is the respect your husband has for how you feel and also spending time with someone who is openly in to him. That is also not a friendship; that is at least one party seeking more then friendship, and that would be for me absolutely inappropriate. My husband made 2 new girl friends when working during his masters, they were both beautiful, smart and funny - absolutely respectful of their friendship and our relationship, and I felt more then comfortable with him hanging with them without me. I hope you are able to speak to him about how you feel, and for him to show you consideration and respect. I would be very uncomfortable with this kind of scenario, as I think many peopke would be. You have a lot on your plate.
Kids are hard. I am praying for you here but went on enough up top now I didnt want to keep rambling.
Tape to the end. Keep sharing here. Do anything that helps. Take care of you and do something kind for you each day. Know that everyday wont feel like this. It wont help you feel better anyway, provably just worse in the end. Hang in there!!! Xo.
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You dont need it, it makes nothing better absolutely nothing! Stop thinking it makes everything better, it is not your friend its a liar, a homewrecker, a soul sucking demon that would like to even possibly kill you one day, nothing good will come of it
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He cheated on me just found out no physically but alot of romantic talking and pictures
Oh girl, I’m so sorry for you 
I hope you gonna get thru this bad period of time with chin up and sober.
I’m not a good writer but I’m here with you, wish you best. Sometimes life sucks but with alco sucks even more
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