Any luck on recovering
Welcome Anthony. I’m proud of you for deciding to become sober.
I highly recommend checking in daily to keep focus in the checking daily to maintain focus thread.
I also recommend finding some activities to fill time like, running, cycling, working out, meditation/mindfulness, crafts, drawing, reading etc.
I also recommend reading on this forum a lot on this forum and asking questions if you have any.
You can make sobriety a lot easier. It’s really hard to think about staying sober for the rest of my life. If i think, do i want to stay sober for the rest of my life? i think hell no. But I can and want to stay sober for today. The next day, i also think i can stay sober for today. and so on.
Don’t think about not using for life but think about not using today. Do that every day, and it gets way easier. If you are very deep in the shit, you can even think, I’ll stay sober the next 5 minutes.
Don’t listen to your mind, your mind will not stop being a dick, it will be a dick less and less, but it will never fully stop being a dick.
If you have cravings, just play the tape. By that I mean, pretend that you abuse again, then try foreseeing the future. Will it be all butterflies and roses, because you feel so awesome when relapsing, or will it be shame, self-disgust and selfhate?
When your mind tells you that you can use once, that’s bullshit, the biggest bullshit ever. Your addiction just tries to find a way to get satisfied.
I also recommend following the twelve step-program with a sponsor.
I hope this helps
Good luck Anthony, you’ve got this.