I’m seriously starting to consider going to an inpatient rehab. Every attempt I’ve made to achieve long-term sobriety from cocaine so far has failed. I feel like I have such little control over it and my behaviors and so little motivation to do anything other than think about cocaine in my spare time. I really can’t stand this anymore. I relapsed pretty bad this past week or two.
Have any of you been to an inpatient rehab before? What was it like? How long was it? Did you end up relapsing afterwards and if so why? I think I need to go to an inpatient rehab for at least 3 months to gain some control to stop relapsing so much. I’m starting to think that even if it puts my job at risk, maybe it’s worth it.
Then go for it. You got nothing to lose and a lot to gain. You’ll get out of it what you put in.
I personally have not been to in patient but I did outpatient and it gave me the foundation I needed. I went for 3 months and then transitioned into a 12 step program. It’s been 4,5 years and I have not relapsed but I do work on my recovery every single day.
Cocaine will put your job at risk if it hasn’t already. I know in the US, there are laws to protect you when you seek treatment while employed.
My rehab occurred after my 3rd detox in 9 months and lasted 56 days or so. Then I was sent to a 1/2 way house to continue my integration into a sober sane lifestyle. That was back in 1984, been continuously sober since.
Just remember one thing. Your health, your sobriety, your family, and your happiness are YOUR number one priorities. If you continue to keep relapsing while doing this on your own, then i would ask yourself one question. Are you truly ready to kick the habit??
If you are, then your job can wait until your healthy. Go on FMLA / OR some sort of leave of abscense to protect your job and get yourself the help you deserve!!! You deserve a life of sobriety and health and happiness!!!
I personally think 3 months is to short. You need to find out what’s causing you to continue to relapse everytime. It takes time to get healthy and to get this past you. Our minds our so powerful, it’s going to take time to heal. I truly wish you the best of luck on your journey on whatever choices you wind up making. But make yourself your number 1 for once. The job will be there when you get back, i promise you that. Get healthy and make this the past so you can start moving forward to a brighter future ahead. Life is so short. Take advantage of it while you can. Good Luck. I’m here for you if you ever need someone to talk to.
I have not been to rehab, but I am pretty sure the cocaine use puts your job at risk as well. I am no expert, just another old long time abuser of self and substances, but I think that having that dedicated time away, assistance and education at rehab will be a very positive experience for you. And help you with life, health, job and future. An investment in you. It can help break the cycle.
I went to impatient treatment for 28 days in 2018. I stayed sober for a total of 6 months. I ended up relapsing and instead of going back to inpatient I did outpatient but could never get back my sanity and continued to use progressing to my current state which is worse than it’s maybe ever been. It feels worse and the consequences are beyond my comprehension. I have done so much damage to myself and my relationships. I can’t undoe the damage I have done but if I can only find the strength to stop so that at least I have a chance to be a better person, a better father to my son. Right now I can’t even look at myself in the mirror. I am so broken. My spirit is gone. My health is very poor. Mental and physical. The drugs I use have taken everything from me but I continue to use them. I think inpatient is my only hope but I won’t go. I have made pacts with myself but I fail to follow through every time. So ashamed of myself and embarrassed, and I feel so bad for my 12 year old son who is going to lose his dad very soon . I pray, and would appreciate any prayers . I will pray for you all also. I miss that short period of sobriety when I could actually feel the presence of my higher power opening up a path to a good life. The day that I relapsed and turned away I became selfish and sick and incapable.
