Hi im bryan. Im an alcoholic and a addict. 5 months sober
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Hi everyone, my name is Christian and Iām 29 y/o. Iām from Venezuela. (Sorry if my English isnāt prefect since itās my second language)
Iāve been a weekend binge drinker since I was 16 -17. I liked to party hard, with hard liquor for the entire weekend, doing crazy stuff, that I obviously regret every single time.
But from almost 6-7 years to today, the thing got worse. It started to interfiere with my life in all levels. I broke my elbow in 2011 while crazy drunk (needed 2 surgeries to almost fully repair it and it never fully healed). I crashed 2 cars (in one there were 6 m/o twins in the car I hit, thank to God nothing bad happened to them) but never got problems with the law, After those, I kept driving blackout drunk so many times. Iāve spent money that I shouldnāt have spent, had sex with prostitutes (used to go there because I suffer from low steem), However, I kept those mornings drinking in dangerous places that I obviously never think going when sober. Missed work (I work in a family business), missed family gatherings and so on.
I relapsed last weekend doing the same stuff, waking up to severe anxiety and hangover.
What I find most difficult is staying sober in the long term, I seem to forget those horrible things, the reasons why I donāt want to drink anymore.
Wanted to share this with you because I feel I have tons of weight over my shoulders, Iām currently seeing a therapist but Iāve never been to a meeting o AA, but this forum feels kinda something like that. And Iām starting to feel like I wanna go to an actual meeting.
I hope this doesnāt feel boring to you, but Iām in need for support right now.
Thank you so much for taking the time reading this.
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It isnāt boring. Itās the story of most of our lives. When we see this we just relive our lives and how screwed up they have been. I dont share your addiction, but the principles remain the same. Addiction has slowly eroded my life. No more though. Iām 79 days sober and loving life. Glad youāre here. You have a great group of people that can offer a lot of support if you stick around.
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When I told my primary care dr. I was volunteering to quit alchohol after a long addiction she wrote me a note for a week off work and prescribed me librium which helped to minimize the withdrawal symptoms and give me the rest I needed to get my mind straight.
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Thanks mate. Iāll definitely be around here a lot more.
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My name is Jen, I am a 33 year old woman who lives in beautiful northern California. Iām a self described hippy lol, I garden, eat only the most organic or biodynamic foods, Iāve studied biological sciences, nutrition, and psychology, I practice yoga and I find swimming and floating to be very therapeutic. I live in a chemical free household using all natural products whenever possible. However, Iāve been self medicating because Iāve recently been struggling with anxiety, OCD, perfectionism, and an overwhelming amount of stress at work (got a promotion) a lack of faith in our government, leading to my inability to sleep at night. So instead of seeking help from a medical professional, I started late night drinking (after 8pm and the kids were in bed) and I would drink until I passed out because I needed sleep so badly. This has been going on for about a year. Then it stopped working, my mental health symptoms were worsening and I couldnāt sleep, every little noise would startle me, I was having catastrophic thoughts that would keep me up at night, I would replay in my head scenarios at work I could have handled better in the moment. To the outside world I was super women. A great mother, a wonderful wife, a hard job serving the autistic community in a profound way. I just purchase a lovely 6 bedroom home that we are slowly renovating. I was/am a completely functioning alcoholic. But it wasnāt enough anymore so I went to the Dr. To try and get treatment for my mental health issues and was honest with her about the amount of alcohol I was consuming late at night. She gave me meds for my anxiety and wrote me a note for a week off work. Hoping that would help, I quit drinking cold Turkey. Thatās when the withdrawal symptoms kickicked it. I was trembling, my heart rate skyrocketed, my normally low blood pressure went through the roof, and I started to feel a tightness in my chest. It landed me in the ER. I had the paramedics meet me at the corner of my street as to not alarm my 4 children. Grammy came and watched the kids so my husband could come with me to the hospital. They had me IV fluids and librium which helped a lot. An EKG showed I have an undiagnosed underlying heart issues. Iāve been wearing a a heart monitor and havenāt touched alcohol since. The librium has helped a lot with the withdrawal symptoms and getting the rest I need to recuperate. Iāve been sober 6 days (made it through the 4th of july!) And I have a follow up with my Dr. Tomorrow to check in on my health and refer me to the a psychiatrist who can support me in dealing with my issues instead of drowning them in booze.
My husband has struggled with alcoholism in his past, he comes from a family of functional aalcoholics.He however, was an angry drunk who would pick fights with me about nothing. I gave him an ultimatum to quit the booze or I would leave him 3 years ago. He did for 1.5 years and now only drinks mildly in social settings. Heās been my rock through this ordeal. We love each other unconditionally and will always support each other.
I suppose I should mention that I have tried molly, mushrooms, and weed in the past but only one or twice per year max. Purely recreationally and experimentally.
All the AA meetings near me donāt fit in my busy schedule so Iām hoping this app in combination with a psychiatrist will help me kick the habit and help me find healthier outlets for when Iām feeling overwhelmed.
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From what I can tell is that stress is contributing to your drinking. Have you thought about cutting down some activities and focusing on you time some more? That busy schedule that prevents you from hitting meetings might actually be a big cause of drinking.
It also seemed like external forces were additional stressors (the government). It seems you might be interested in AA but canāt make it so I will bring a little bit to you. Iām an alcoholic. As such I am powerless over people places and things. I need to accept the things I cannot change. Thereās nothing you can do to change the state of the world. You can only change how you react to it. Meditation is a good way to expell negative thoughts from your mind.
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My name is Chelsea, Iām 27 & Iām an alcoholic.
I have 2 sons & a boyfriend.
I finally realized I was an alcoholic when i drank too much and me and my boyfriend got into a huge fight leading me to stay with my mom for a few days with our son.
He wanted to end things for good because my drinking was out of hand. I promised him for the hundredth time I would stop drinking, and I proved it to him when I went to my first AA meeting that same day.
I would drink almost every night. I didnāt want to go anywhere I couldnāt drink, and I didnāt want to go anywhere the next day from being to hungover from alcohol.
I have gone 17 days sober then, relapsed at least 6 timesā¦ I am 3 days sober now, and i hope to stick to itā¦
I feel kind of alone in my circle because everyone else in my family drinks, and they donāt really understand.
I really want to stay sober, I know I can do it. Some days areharder than others, but life is ten times better without being enslaved to alcohol.
I donāt have to worry about money Iām spending on it anymore. I donāt have to worry if where Iām going has alcohol. I can spend more time with my kids.
Iām living life. Itās truly amazing, living life sober. 
Alcohol is the only drug, you have to explain why you donāt take it.
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I feel like we have some new members. I invite you to introduce yourselves. 
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Iām new! Been on here, like, a couple weeks now. I come on every day, sometimes multiple times if I need a distraction from urges. Iām 39, I abuse alcohol and have been drinking since I was 13 or 14, canāt remember exactly. I have a degree in Social Science and two in Biology, been going to college since I was 23 and just finished my last year. I work as a biologist for a small consulting firm in California. I have two kids from different fathers: eldest is a 17 year old girl whose father is a drug addict and schizophrenic and we donāt associate with him. And the 9 year old boy, his dad lives is town but doesnāt work or do anything.
I have several close friends but they all live well over 3 hours away. I am estranged from everyone in my family following the death of my mother last year, except my 2 nephews, ages 14 and 21. I only get to see them because I am friends with my sisterās ex, their dad.
Ummmmmmā¦ so yea, I pretty much do my life alone. I have gone to one AA meeting and I do plan to go to more, especially on weekends when I am not working. I follow the Refuge Recovery plan, a Buddhist perspective, even thought Iām not Buddhist myself, it resonates more than the spiritual aspect of AA, and I find SMART recovery is not spiritual enough! As of this typing, Iāve been alcohol free for 9 days which is the longest Iāve been alcohol free in about 6 years. You can read my bio as I probably left stuff out. I also have a piece in the Your Story section if you want to read the bare bones of my journey with alcoholism and addiction.
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Hey everyone!
IĀ“ve been on here for a few month now but have only been reading. This is my first entrie and english is my second language so please donĀ“t mind my mistakes.
IĀ“m 28 years old and IĀ“ve been drinking since I was 17/18 and it got realy bad the last three years. In April this year I finally realized that I have a problem and that I need to change so I stopped drinking. I went to some AA meetings and they realy helped me. But over the summer I got careless and slowly started drinking again. I talked myself into believing that itĀ“s not that bad and I could just drink less then bevore but (of course) that was wrong and I happend to have some very, very bad days in August.
Now I`m completely sober again in my first week. I started to go to AA meetings again and I intend to keep going so my mind canĀ“t trick me into āforgettingā again.
I also started a new education this week which I really enjoy. I love learning again and I get along great with my classmates. The fact that itĀ“s going so well makes me nervous because I tend to sabotage myself a lot when I start to feel good about my life. So I realy hope that (among other things) writing here can help me accept and deal with my addiction everyday.
Thanks for everyone on here, just reading your entries has already helped a lot!
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Keep getting better at getting better, each and every day.
And your English is just fine. Keep posting!
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stay connected to this community. you got this:grinning:
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oops that was meant to be an emoji
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Hello, my name is Ashley. Iām 34, married, a mother of two amazing kids and from the U.S. My struggle was/is with alcohol and decided that enough was enough on 9/20/18. I work full time night shift, go to school full time 
(ADN to BSN) and graduate 11/18/18. Just like many of you, alcohol has negatively affected my life one too many times and Iām slowly learning how to live life without it.
Iām really enjoying this forum/reading everyoneās posts and comments. I love the openness and honesty in everyone here so far and hope to make a few friends along the way.
Wishing everyone the best XO
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Nick, alcoholic. Struggled with sobriety. Went to AA when I couldnt struggle anymore. Accepted I was powerless over alcohol. Feeling amazing living sober today.
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Itās great that youāve come here, you have a lot of support from this community & it isnāt easy at first but you can do this. This is a step in the right directionš
Hi everyone, Iām new here,so bear with me. My name is Bonnie, Iām 56 years old,and have been married for 35 to my high school sweetheart,although I donāt know how he put up with me that long. Iāve been sober 2 days shy of 90 today. I am very proud of myself, really didnāt think I could do it. Iāve been an alcoholic for probably 35 years, although I didnāt know it then. It started in high school, going to parties, my parents let us have parties at our house,n they drank with us. Itās all down hill from there.i did a lot of stupid things before it was over. Iām lucky to still have my husband and family, (3kids) 35,32,n 26. They didnāt have the time of day for me when I was drinking, and I donāt blame them. I finally realized that I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. Tired of lying, hiding n myself, so I went to Greenbriar for 26 days and here I am. And I feel better than I ever thought I would. Thanks for listening, Iāll be around 
ļø
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Hi everyone,
Have been on the forum for a long time now, not really actively, but there none the less.My name is Nicky, I am 40 years old. I have used alcohol as my coping skill for the last 20 years. I come from a family of alcoholics in various stages of destruction. I decided 5 years ago I had, had enough of alcohol. Have managed to stop for very long periods, but as soon as life gets tough I run back to the bottle. Have had a particularly tough time in the last 5 years.Have had a few miscarriages. Relocated 350km from my husband, as we farm and schooling for our kids is far away, I am staying with them. My oldest son has just finished school and is off to University, my heart is happy and proud but hurting too.On day 10 and really hoping to kick this thing once and for all. Going for therapy to try and create better coping skills. Anyway thatās my condensed version. Thank-you @Robin for this group and everyone on it who inspire me everyday.
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Hello,
Iām from the UK and I have a problem with alcohol. While I can go without a drink, once I start I have no off switch. Iām a binge drinker that blacks out on most occasions, can become abusive and violent, and doesnāt often remember things the next day.
Today, hungover, vomiting and feeling sorry for myself for going on a bender, I feel like Iāve finally hit rock bottom. I was out of control aggressive towards my partner who has decided to leave because he canāt put up with it anymore.
While our relationship hasnāt been good for a while, ithe events of last night were incredibly counterproductive to any chance of moving forward.
Itās been a huge wake up call and I want to be a better person. I feel miserable and ashamed of myself. I also feel disgustingly hungover so any cures, besides going tee total and not looking back, would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks!