Living with someone who drinks

[kayisfunkyfresh]

Is it unfair for me to ask my husband not to bring alcohol into the house?

[Dazercat]

Welcome Kay,
I guess everyone is different.
What helps me is I go to Al-Anon. I been sober over 2 years and my wife has drank every one of those days but 6 of them this past summer. I really wanted my sobriety so bad. And we been married a million years so no I didn’t think it was fair or even thought about her not bringing booze into OUR house. My wife supports my sobriety but she made it clear she’s gonna drink.

There’s a lot of topics on this.

Does your partner still drink? Some threads you may find helpful

Mine does and I discussed it fairly frequently when I was on here more. I know this question comes up a lot…How do I get sober with a partner who drinks? So often we are told we have to avoid situations and people who drink, sometimes it is even suggested that we cut them from our lives entirely. For those of us with partners who drink and whom we love and respect, that is not practical or helpful advice. Obviously some of us cannot stay with an abusive, reckess or violent alcoholic, but as we …

[Lisa07]

Welcome Kay! My husband continued to drink when I got sober too. I asked him not to bring alcohol in the house but he still did. I didn’t get on his case about it though because it’s his home as much as it’s mine. What helped me was to remember, his alcohol wasn’t mine to touch. Working my AA program and posting about it here helped me get thru those difficult days. Having alcohol around didn’t bother me as much as his slurring and actions while drinking. We spent many evenings in separate rooms. I would be in one room attending online meetings, while he was in another drinking. I lead by example and showed him a sober life is a better life and eventually he stopped as well. It took him 2 years but everyone moves at their own pace.

[Dolse71]

I would be honest and tell him how it makes you feel, not about him, are you at risk of drinking it etc then leave the decision up to him. If your worried about your sobriety go to an online meeting instead of the bottle.

[Ray_M_C_Laren]

Think if its a problem sit down and tell him how you feel. you never know wish you well

[Twizzlers]

Welcome to the community
I think you could attempt to talk about it together.

[Shaunda]

For me, when i stopped i didnt feel it was right to ask my husband to stop drinking in his home. With that said, i have set boundaries for my own sobriety. Simple things like, please dont kiss me right after you take a drink. Please open the window and blow the smoke outside. He fully supports my sobriety and is happy to make adjustments to help me maintain “my” sobriety. Even though he admits he is an alcoholic he is very clear that he isnt ready to quit. I feel “for me” i have no right to control when or where he drinks. Alanon and counseling help me out immensely with this issue. Its not always so simple. Especially since i get jealous at times that he is drinking and i just cant anymore.

This is just my experience and in no way am i trying to tell you what is or isnt right for your home.