Hello all, I’m new here. I’ve been a Marijuana addict for about ten years now. I suffer from severe anxiety and panic attacks, which is the reason I started smoking. I remember my first joint, and the feeling it brought. I had no anxiety and panic was the furthest thing from my mind. Then I went on to try different things, just about everything except for a syringe in my arm.
Now I only smoke though. Or smoked. A lot of these years are completely gone to me, so many memories lost…
I’ve been arrested before, but I’ve managed to hide it from all of my employers, until now.
Last week I had to do a drug test, and of course it was positive. Just found out today, and my boss called me in. I could feel the panic slowly creeping up on me, but I held it in.
Now I’m not allowed to come back to work until I am clean, and I’ve gone through rehab.
I have tried to quit several times, but I’ve never managed to. But then on the other hand, I was never open with it… I really want to quit this time, and with the support from you guys n gals I have high hopes =)
Sorry for the wall of text, I really needed to get it of my chest.
Anyone else with a similar story that they want to share?
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Might as well do the rehab thing then. Normally I just get fired so it’s a blessing you get rehab
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If you work for a big enough company they have counseling services and sometimes can help you pay for rehab through their insurance. Not always, but it can’t hurt to ask!
I smoked for 12 years and now I’m on day 39 without it, the longest since I started. It took a while to adjust to being able to sleep without it, but I sleep better now, remember my dreams, and breathe easier. I saw it as medicine, and had a medical card, but I couldn’t afford it anymore and don’t miss it much. Taking it one day at a time, or even one minute at a time, will add up. It’s not worth losing your job, right? It’s great you’re being given a second chance.
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I’ve been burning for so long about 23 years daily. I never really considered myself addicted. I saw it as a way of life…but it’s holding me back alot. And its like i NEED to be high all the time or im in a bad mood. There was a time i quit everything including pot for 6 months i was in aa. I gained a ton of weight and didnt care… (which is crazy because i obsess over my weight) i was happy i guess but felt like a loose canon if that makes sense…actually more like a balloon u let the air out of and it flies all over. But i dont like that person. I always said and did such stupid things. Smoking keeps me from making bad decisions. keeps me in the moment. Sane even ? Maybe.
I’m with you on the weed and the anxiety and all the crap that comes with it! I’m currently on day 4 of not smoking any and I used to have an 8th a day every day for 7 years so I feel you completely.
Best thing to do is get rid of all paraphanialia, it helps so much, even putting grinders out of sight had made it abit easier for me.
I’d use the fact that you can go back to work after rehab as motivation to get through it all 
good luck and know you’re not alone 
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I’m actually gonna have a meeting next week with my work and they are gonna put up a rehab plan for me. Guess I’m a super lucky guy, but I think everyone deserves the same chance I got.
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I feel you. It’s medicin, it really is. I believe it’s very individual, in my case I think it is actually making my condition worse. =(
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I got fired the day I got out of my first rehab lol. Well forced to resign
Good advice, just keep it all as far away as possible! =)
Ouch, that hurts. I’m pretty sure I’m very lucky, or my country has different laws, I’m not sure.
Oh, it’s not legal here either, but it wasn’t worth the fight. I just smiled and thanked them haha
I have smoked for the last 20 years, super heavily the past 10. I am proudly 3 days sober!!!
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Yeeees! That’s exactly how I feel. All of it, including the moodiness! I have ADHD, and I AM that balloon when I’m not high. I am 3 days sober, and scared of who I am going to become…
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good luck and know you’re not alone 