My circle is getting smaller

Bernardcelina1 · April 17, 2021, 7:51am

Anyone else feeling alone?

siand · April 17, 2021, 8:07am

I don’t know where you are in your recovery journey, but I have found that over time I have made new connections. My circle might be smaller, but it’s stronger. It hasn’t happened over night, it is hard at times and sometimes it totally sucks. But being stuck in cycles of addiction can be pretty lonely too.

Here is a collection of threads that you might find helpful -

Welcome! I hope you can build a good sober network here while you work on finding one in real life

Bernardcelina1 · April 17, 2021, 8:52am

Thank you😊47 days strong

CNevarezN · April 17, 2021, 9:39am

In the beginning it was very lonely for me because of the circumstances I was in. I ended up embracing my loneliness though and it personally made me the better. Congratulations on your 47 days and welcome to Talking Sober. Please, feel free to express yourself freely here. You will find that a lot of people will relate to you.

vaariesga · April 17, 2021, 2:59pm

I feel it sometimes. The combination of sobriety and the virus has changed a lot of things in my world and really hit any social interactions pretty hard. Is important to find some good quality people to keep around that are supportive and have fun without alcohol. I am working on that list myself, but I hear the further in you get the more people you end up being able to meet. Hopefully the virus stuff let’s up soon and many of the non-alcohol activities will get back going again here!

VSue · April 17, 2021, 4:39pm

For me I prefer a smaller circle…it’s more personal and intimate. But I’m a strong introvert, lots of people make me anxious. Probably why I drank.

Shebadica · April 18, 2021, 5:32am

Totally it’s about as small as my two kids and my dad now.

siand · April 18, 2021, 6:28am

When we can find peace with ourselves, we can see the difference between being alone and being lonely

@Bernardcelina1 congrats on your days! Keep checking in and reach out whenever you need to.

Yoda-Stevie · April 18, 2021, 12:17pm

I look at it this way: sobriety is a battle. It’s a war, and if I have to go into a fight, who would I rather have around me? A company of marginal soldiers who I have weaker attachments to, or a small group of hardcore warriors who are my battle brothers?

I know who I choose.

C_8 · April 18, 2021, 12:50pm

That, for me, is a Drop-The-Mike post!!

Lisa07 · April 18, 2021, 1:05pm

Welcome Celina and congrats on 47 days (prob 48 now). Unfortunately, I can’t relate to your situation but wanted to welcome you. My circle got very small during my addiction and now I’m working on expanding it which has been a huge challenge. I’m glad you found us and I’m sure you’ll get a lot of support around here.

JDhangover · April 18, 2021, 1:39pm

A smaller circle is actually a good thing. Perhaps it’s different and it’s making you feel alone, but I’m sure in the long run you’ll see how real things are. Ask yourself why your circle your circle got smaller? Because your “friends” don’t call or hang out with you anymore because you’re bettering your life? Listen, they’re not true friends, they’re acquaintances. People you hung out with because you had a vice I’m common. I’m sure you had some fun times etc, but I’m also sure that each one of those memories involved drinking or drugs or whatever your addiction is.

I went about my journey a different way. I somehow learned to ditch those so called friends before I quit my addiction which is alcohol. Guess what? To date, only 2 of them have called up to say hi. I don’t mind at all and I have no hard feelings about it. I simply move on with my life and continue to be me. You’re going to learn who your friends are and that will only make you stronger. The new friends you make will be real friends, not “drinking buddies”.

VSue · April 18, 2021, 2:04pm

I like this. When we learn to love ourselves and our own company we are never lonely.