My name is Trevor and I’m an alcoholic and a drug addict. I left detox against medical advice. I felt so incredibly restless and the timeframe for meds was Not to my liking. I know I made a mistake by leaving early. But I’m trying to remain grateful. I think I have five days sober. I managed to eat some Ramen soup earlier and took some magnesium powder. God help me stay sober. I’m feeling right now. I’m feeling so much Love in my heart I can’t fully explain it. I’m grateful that the place I’m staying at the roommate is giving me a couple weeks to figure out where to go. I don’t want to be back on the streets. I will probably have to stay at a homeless shelter. But I’ve been here before. I gave up on myself recently and I realized I have a chance to succeed if only I can get past this hard time. I’m so grateful for all the people that reached out and made me feel so much better. I struggle with technology and I don’t know how to respond to every single person that gave me hope. But I’m so grateful for the community. I love you guys. I’ll try to figure out what to do. If I can just get through today. I need to find Dedication. I need to find hope. I need to find love. I need to get better. I am a alcoholic and a drug addict. I have bipolar disorder. I also have anxiety. This is my life. But it’s not River. I will try to keep in touch. I will try to take care of myself. I will try to get better. For myself
You are not alone. 
Take care of yourself Trevor. And let others help you. Alone it’s too much. Don’t go it alone plz. You need help like we all do. Take care 
Thank you for that. Hope you’re having a good day or night wherever you live. God bless
Thank you. Thank you for the motivation. I always appreciate your photos of where you live. I always love seeing different places. You’re really taking care of yourself. And I appreciate that. We can do this together. Not alone
Welcome back Trev. Now, take it one day at a time. One hour or minute at a time when it needs to be.
Look after yourself basic needs first: food, shelter, sobriety.
Stay connected here by using this thread as your personal check-in, or use Checking in daily to maintain focus #52
For gratitude:
Daily Gratitude, The Air Of Recovery #3
Next I want to ask you, are you in therapy for your MH issues, have you any possibility to go to talk to someone?
Welcome back. One foot in front the other. You’re not alone and you can do this.
Much love
I really want to be sober. I’m struggling right now and I’m still detoxing so I don’t necessarily feel sober. I know I can get there. I can’t wait to be able to eat properly. I got lost really quickly. I think I had about six months before I relapsed. And how quickly I get drained out…When I go back to pills these fake Percocets really got a hold of me. And I get lost on them so quickly it really scares me. But something inside of me wants to live. I want to survive. I’m not sure what the future holds but I need to go back to therapy and get a hold of my issues. I hear what you’re saying about going back to therapy or medication. Thanks for reaching out. I’m Struggling to be able to read responses but I’m trying my best. Thank you for the support and love. I can’t express enough how much that means to me
Yeah, that’s fucking scary man. How quickly it can all go away again. I hear you. I remember my life before sobriety well, when I was also lost in my mental health problems and man, I did not see the sun, ever.
I believe you when you say you want to be sober. I saw you fight before and you have a lot of fight in you. You can do it again. I and many others here will be rooting for you on the sidelines. Cheering you on, helping if we can at all.
If you’re still detoxing take it easy. Sleep, rest, hydration, some food once you can, magnesium and B vitamins, zinc, that kinda stuff. You don’t have to do anything other today than to look after yourself, rest, and not use. Repeat tomorrow.
I look forward to reading from you again very soon! Stay strong Trev.
I hear you. And thank you so much for making me feel less alone. I’m going to try to fight for my life. I’m so grateful for music right now. I’m so grateful for motivation from my favorite artist. I’m pretty sure God has my back. And when I say God I mean mother nature. Because that makes sense to me. Thank you for responding and reaching out. That means so much to me. Hope you’re having a good day or night wherever you live.
Music and nature are powerful forces for sure. Make me feel less alone as well, that’s what art is all about imho.
I’m glad I could make a small difference for you today. I’m going to bed over here where I live. I’ll be checking in how you getting on.
Bye for now!
Welcome back Trevor. So glad you found your way back to sobriety and us (your extended family).
I battled those fake percs myself so I know how horrible the detox is. Sending you love and strength to get through this. 
Have you considered sober living? Could be a better alternative to a homeless shelter. I don’t know anything about it but I have heard people mention the Oxford House during online meetings.
Stay safe Trevor.
If not going back to rehab find yourself another safe spot if possible.
Let the good people in your life, let them help you. Go back to rehab. Sure it’s not fun and yes you are restless there. But at the end it’s good for you.
im through the worse of it … im on day 5 i think. i just started being able to keep food down and the night sweats and vomiting have gone away… i hope i never have to go though this again… im considering all my options right now… sober living and all… these places cost money so im trying to figure out how to make that happen… but i could find money for drugs so i can find money for sober living
So glad you are here, dear friend. One day at a time.
thank you for the motivating words. im on a misson to never go back to these pills or vodka. my brain wants to fool me and tell me im better off with them but thats crazy thinking . it sucks the life out of me and drains me. i know that i stopped taking care of myself… im almost so happy to be so sick and tired because the only way is up
thank you … im going to fight for my life
love you guys. drinking powerade and water … got some soup down and feeling a little better, thank god for music and youtube . i think i will be ok… i think i can make it through today
damn thank you for this information . ive been told that my liver is failing from years of drinking and pills but i have a shot to save myself… its not to far gone… im not surprised by this info. my side hurts even after periods of 6 months of being sober and 2 times ago i almost had a year… i will research what you sent … i believe what your talking about
@Bluekoolaid man i was worried about you when i saw you checking in less. Im sorry your addiction reared its ugly head but YOU CAN DO THIS. Find some sobriety resources. Check out sober living. Do whatever possible to keep the distance between you and these poisons. You’re a beautiful soul and you deserve some self love and grace. Hell i forgot if you tried mtgs before but its a whole new chance to see what sober tools will free you from the insanity of using.
Meditate in nature, find a job at a plant store?, do at least a 10min walk in the sunshine. There are many ways you can connect to mother nature and feed your soul. I hope to see you putting in the work one day at a time
thank you for the positive words. im sorry i went back to these pills and vodka but i was asking for it. im happy to be eating again and i feel a little better. so far today i had 2 bowls of ramen and a couple cans of tuna… my body needed this. i have enough food for maybe a week and im trying to be happy about that,. i will try to get some sunshine like you talked about… i remember being on here less and less and i feel that helped me go back to the pills and drinking … i got lost on not taking a part in my recovery … so i payed for that . thanks for reaching out and im so grateful for the motivation you give me … thank you