Work has been really stressful. Long days, late hours, busy, unorganized, stressful, and the money hasn’t been that great.
There are a lot of sheisty things happening that don’t sit well with me and it’s been adding up. Tonight I got in a bad mood and I told my manager I was unhappy and discussed everything. The problem is he was on board with everything I said, but the owner is the issue. I appreciate him hearing me out and honestly there needs to be a serious meeting with the owner.
I really care about everyone at my job and that is really rare. Aside from all the behind the scene bullshit, I actually enjoy my job and I believe in the potential of that company growing but I just really have to keep my serenity in check and try to put more of an effort into working on myself in my free time so I won’t allow work to affect me as much.
I really just needed to rant that because being a sober bartender is wild. In the best and worst ways.
I can totally understand this. My job is a huge huge frustration to me. For instance, I can’t handle in inefficientcies when improvement is so easily within reach, especially when it concerns my time or my pocket book.
Sobriety has shown me that I have to do what I can to cause change in the place and then I have to be able to let it go. I can’t change other people or places. Once I have said my piece, that is it. If I can’t shake it, I have to look at why I can’t shake it.
Is it selfcentered fear, ego, or by accepting it am I being a door mat and letting the unacceptable become acceptable. If it is the first two, I have work to do. If it’s the third, I have to then look to what I can change, which comes slowly sometimes. Then I have to have the courage to change.