I’m just gonna spill my guts. So here goes.
Up until some time in 2018 I was sober. I was sober for 4 years. It was good and I was proud.
I wish I could remember exactly what happened to make that change. I know that I was able to stay sober because I never allowed myself to be in situations where there was danger. And I was 100% up front about it.
The last five months or so have been especially bad. I’ve been drinking pretty much every night. I’m sitting here with a pounding headache right now, hot and cold, bloated, can’t sleep. For what? I don’t feel any better.
I’m certainly not the best version of myself.
I had a surgery a week ago I should be recovering from and instead I’ve spent the last two days drunk.
I want it back. Finally. I finally want it back. I want to care about myself again. I want to be the best version of myself again. For me, for my family, for my dogs.
We can’t go backward, but we certainly can move forward, one little bit at a time, and that’s what I’m going to do today.
I’m scared, but I know I can.
Thanks for listening.