I’ve been sober for a little over a month now. The first 30 days wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I had my moments, but overall it wasn’t bad. It was the 30 day mark that something just switched in my brain. I’m angry all the time, and all I can think about is how much I absolutely hate this. I feel like every second is one second closer to completely losing it. Anyone else experience this? Everyone i know who’s gotten sober says they feel a million times better and happier. Why am I not feeling that?
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Sounds like a dry drunk. This is when you put down the drink but don’t replace it with anything in your life. I would suggest AA. If I didn’t go to AA I’d be one miserable sober person, or more likely I’d be dead
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How much did you spend drinking? And what are you doing now to fill in the void?
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I know exactly how u feel…it really sucks
I went through how your feeling upto the 30 days now I feel less like that and it is mainly because I replaced alcohol with sugary foods, doing a CBT and program and scheduling in stuff to do with my time, which I have a lot of lately because I quit my job to concentrate on my recovery, you need to find a healthy outlet and going to some sort of meeting or program will definitely help with your mindset
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I remember hitting a rough patch around 30 days - then again around 60 and again around 90. I’ve heard other folks say the same. For me, I think each milestone was a moment of “Oh my God - am I really doing this? Am I really going to go through life without alcohol?” With that came some sadness and resentment that I couldn’t just be like everyone else. Why can’t I drink like a normal person?!?
As I got a little further along in my program, I saw my life changing due to sobriety. As it turned out, it wasn’t about just removing alcohol from my life. I had some huge emotional, mental and spiritual work to do. When my four month marker came, it honestly didn’t feel any different from any other day. I had gone from being angry that I could not drink to being thankful for my new way of life. For me, that mental shift was huge. Is every day great now. Absolutely not - but I get to deal with challenges like a sane person, not someone who numbs to escape them.
That’s just my two cents. It does get easier with time.
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I remember hitting a rough patch around 30 days - then again around 60 and again around 90. I’ve heard other folks say the same. For me, I think each milestone was a moment of “Oh my God - am I really doing this? Am I really going to go through life without alcohol?” With that came some sadness and resentment that I couldn’t just be like everyone else. Why can’t I drink like a normal person?!?
As I got a little further along in my program, I saw my life changing due to sobriety. As it turned out, it wasn’t about just removing alcohol from my life. I had some huge emotional, mental and spiritual work to do. When my four month marker came, it honestly didn’t feel any different from any other day. I had gone from being angry that I could not drink to being thankful for my new way of life. For me, that mental shift was huge. Is every day great now? Absolutely not - but I get to deal with challenges like a sane person, not someone who numbs to escape them.
That’s just my two cents. It does get easier with time.
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I’ve been here MANY times and it’s NORMAL depending on how long you’ve been accustom to drinking. When we drink, we pretty much press pause on our coping skills and emotional development. I know it sounds harsh, but reality often is. These are simply GROWING PAINS that are to be embraced not taken for granted. Sobriety and abstinence is just as much (if not more so) psychological than physical. It will test every fiber of your being and take you to the depths of your soul and to the brink of insanity trying to decode and make sense of it all… but at the same time, if you can stick to it and get to the ROOT of your triggers and work through WHY you drink, sobriety can be the light that guides you to the heaven of your internal being. There will be days where you’ll question everything and nothing seems right only to be followed by feelings of joy and accomplishment as you prove to yourself that your stronger than your own limiting beliefs.
To grow muscles, they must first be exercised and the same is true with sobriety. We need to exercise patience, self control, and endurance if we are to win the prize of being reborn into ‘recovery’. Take it easy, go at your own pace, and check in continually to keep inspired and motivated!
This is a LONG DISTANCE race not a fast sprint. There are bound to be moments where you want to give up and spike your gatorade with vodka but DON’T DO IT! You have to much to gain by success!
Train hard by what you feed your mind and body. Think happy and positive thoughts of a sober future. Alcohol will give you nothing and take your everything. Let those days be behind you and stretch forward with goals of abundance in view! Also, try to incorporate B vitamins (get B shots if you can) into your diet/routine. Drinking depletes us of these vital nutrients that are essential to keeping us happy, healthy, and determined to succeed. You must feed your body and spirit for your soul to take flight and soar among the stars! #TrueStoryBro
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That’s exactly where I was before my last, long relapse. There’s some really good advice above.
This time I’m feeling a lot better after five weeks in. I listened this time to all these great people. It was really important to work through WHY I drank, why that didn’t work, admit I wasn’t going to do it on my own, start tackling the things that used to knock me down, and hopefully soon, keep building beyond that. Frankly, it’s been emotionally difficult as I’d been pretty good at ignoring how I felt about things. But it’s also been liberating.
I realized I needed a full attitude adjustment or I’d just fall back into the same cycle. That’s what all the recovery programs are really about. Lots of great insights on them around the forum if you’re curious.
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I’ve replaced the drinking itself with mountain dew. But I’ve been using drawing and guitar to occupy myself as much as possible.
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As in how much money? And mainly I’ve been playing guitar, drawing or watching TV to fill the void.
No, how much time did you spend drinking? And although those are great activities, it sounds a little isolating.
Oh, I spent a lot of time drinking. Basically whenever I wasnt working or sleeping I had a beer in my hands. And yeah they probably are, but I’m not much of a people person. Being around groups of people makes me uncomfortable and anxious so I just kinda keep to myself most of the time
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That’s how I am! 
I’ve definitely had to fill up my evenings differently since giving up alcohol. I’m extremely introverted, so time to myself is wanted and embraced.
Maybe ameeting might help meet new sober friends get phone numbers ,for me they def made the journey in recovery easier wish you well
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I meant the spiritual void. I suggest you try a meeting bc guitars and mountain dew can’t talk you out of a relapse.
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Thank God someone else gets it.
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Music can and has actually. People underestimate its strength.
I don’t know what you’re interests are, but I’ve been watching documentaries and reading!
I use music for my meditation. It’s but a part of my larger recovery.
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