Last night I went out to the bar and told myself it was for food only. As soon as I sat down a beer and shot was put right in front of me. I haven’t been to this place in months. It’s like cheers everywhere I go because, I do get remembered. To make a long story short that did not end well. Did not stop till late at night and had no idea how much I actually ended up drinking. Just was sucked into conversations and the social life again. That’s also part of the problem, I love the social aspect. I am currently at my lake house in rural PA so It’s not even much of a social place but I made it into one. I was doing so well and caved instantly. This shows the lack of control I really do have.
Control in this situation would be difficult for anyone recovering, myself included. Doesn’t sound like a healthy place to go just for food and now you know. It’s a new day and a new opportunity to try again. I’ve had many, many day ones and now I’m 27 days in, longest stretch ever. Stay busy on here, there’s a great support system. Wish you the best!
The very last time I drank, the same thing happened. Stay away from bars for now. It is just too hard. Don’t beat yourself up too much either. This is a process.
If you need excuses, Covid being the reason for take out is always valid.
I’m sorry this happen. But today is day 1 again. Stay strong, pray hard and fight like hell bud
Early sobriety stay away from drink that includes bars if you want to eat try macdonalds
On another note, watch out for brain trickery. The same thing can happen when you think to yourself, I can have just one.
Honestly, I personally realized that the last time that I set foot in a bar, I had already made the subconsious decision to drink.
Try not to beat yourself up. Think about what you have learned from this experience and how you can take that information to be more successful in the future. You are already on the right track again by coming here to talk about it and recognizing where you went wrong. Now you have the choice to make if you are going to go back to being sober or are you going to let this one night snowball out of control into days/weeks/months of drinking. Sounds like you’ve made the choice that you want to stay sober, and that is something to be proud of. Dust yourself off and keep fighting the good fight.
Why did you go to a bar? Wasn’t there any place else you could go for food? You posted about your concerns going to the lake house to begin with and then you deliberately put yourself in harms way. Sorry if that sounds harsh but It doesn’t make sense.
Hi Ryan, sorry to hear you relapsed. What’s your actual plan to get sober? Do you have a plan? It’s like wanting to go from place A to place B, without knowing if you’re walking, going by car, by bus or airplane. If you don’t have a plan, you’ll stay stuck in place A forever!
Why put yourself back in the mud after you were on dry ground. We have to really work on our sobriety sometimes if its what we need, wanting and hoping to be sober only gets us so far. Might try reaching out asking for support before you go into the places that are not the best for your recovery, you can make it just get more support to get you on your feet. You made it back here dont be afraid to ask for help when you need it.
One of the things I did when I finally quit drinking, I wrote a list of everything place I went to where I drank. That list became my personal banned from list. At first, I figured My social life was fucked. That list of establishments was a small percentage of places to go and eat.
Protect your sobriety, and a phenomenal life follows.
Hi how has the past week been for you ?
Thought id check in see how you are doing.
I struggle with similar issues. I love the social aspect of it. For that reason, I’ve made it a promise to myself that I won’t return to bars where the bartenders, owners, and regulars know me on a first name basis.
I have been on a long out of control spiral. I am hurting myself and other. I’m really trying but that voice in the back of my just has to much control.
Have you ever tried AA meetings ? Either face to face meetings or online meetings ?
I know taking that first step and those first couple of days are so hard.
Asking and accepting help is difficult at first but i can tell you from experience that asking health professionals and opening up to them is nothing bad like we can often imagine and its confidential, maybe this would be helpful to your recovery?
I had many years sober before this time around and i relapsed and carried on drinking heavier and heavier over 2 years, nothing good came of it.
You need to bounce back and start your new day 1, dont let the feelings of shame, guilt etc Keep you in a dark place and a downward spiral of drinking until you have nothing left to lose.
You are worth so much, make a plan and tell yourself when you wake up " i will not drink just for today" and do it one day at a time.
Find that strength and power inside you, its there you just have to pull it out.
Start your new fresh day 1 you have all of us here to support you or chat to at anytime we know how you feel and have experienced what your going through.
I know you can make this change and you must believe in yourself.
What do you think will help you to start your new day1?
What plan do you think will help you just get through your day1 ?
Hey Ryan, we’ve all been where you’re at but you got to want sobriety more than anything else. What are you willing to do to fight that voice? For me, it was detox, IOP and AA. Have you considered rehab? There comes a point when you have to ask for help. That is not a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength.
I need to talk to someone. I need to not be at the bar twice a day. And stop getting in fights. This past Friday was difficult. I can’t move, I went on a all day binge. Ended the night with a fight after starting drinking at 12 and the bar tender and manager holding me till 4 am to sleep for a few hours down stairs. I am surrounding myself with negativity. And I look worse every day. I have zero motivation. The only time I feel anything is drunk.
Sounds to me you got to get yourself to a meeting. ASAP. AA being the most obvious, although there’s others too. But I’m sure you need peer support. Now. Time to admit you can’t make it out alone. We’re here too for you. I am here. Break the cycle.
It is a cycle. I spend more time at the bar then home. It really is sad. As I sit there and go on a roller coaster ride of emotions. Happy, angry, sad. I am happy that I feel social. Angry at myself when I realize what I’m doing. Then sad because I see it in the eyes of the ones I love that I am hurting them.