No meeting and need to share

Need a place to share, let’s put the kettle on.

Anything any subject.
We’re hear to listen.

8 Likes

my name is Paul and I’m an alcoholic, since my last share so much pain has left me, I now realise how much I need other people around me who understand, my Mrs is against everything I do, she says just don’t buy a drink if you don’t want one, but I do want one, they will never get it. I still consider picking up, even this virus is a trigger bc if I’m going to die I might as well enjoy it while I can. I’ve had 3 days off work and I’m frightened to go back as I work in a care home and worry about infection. It’s true ignorance is bliss bc none of this bothered me until I started to investigate it. Im so proud of all of you for what you are doing for yourselves, I’m glad you are here for me, that’s it, thank you.

23 Likes

Hi. I’m Kelly and a grateful alcholic.
I had to have a staff meeting with all my staff to go over company protocols for COVID. Just home now. Friday evening here. I am drained. But I won’t drink. Gotta keep the mind busy. Yeah @Dolse71 I have to agree you are right. This virus is more than I can handle right now. But I guess never a good time for pandemic.
Going crash. Have a soda water. Watch netflix. Check in here.

9 Likes

Thanks for the share Pauly.
Hi my name’s Geoff, I’m a alcoholic!
I do feel for you buddy. I know you have been struggling lately.
I had a bit of a day yesterday. First time I’ve actually really felt like drinking for a while to be fair.
I wouldn’t have, I know, because I don’t drink.
I surrendered completely to the fact that I have a bad relationship with alcohol very early in my journey. This allowed me to start rebuilding my sober life early.
I reach 500 days on Sunday. A fact that 18 months ago, I would have found extremely hard to comprehend.
I would have laughed. In fact I did laugh in my wife’s face on the 31 Oct 2018. She asked me to try sober November with her.
Guess my Higher Power had other ideas. Because I didn’t end up doing it for her, but for me.
My confidence in my sobriety is 100%
I have no worries that I may falter. This will not happen, because the only thing that can make me drink is myself.
And I don’t drink.
Anyway, I don’t want to say too much because I was going to do a 500 day share on the What’s it like before and now thread.
But basically guys, you can do it.
Just don’t listen to the negative voices. Either the one in your head or the external ones belonging to family and friends. None of them matter, because we are doing this for ourselves.
Thanks for letting me share this @Dolse71.
:kissing_heart:

17 Likes

Thanks for sharing Kelly. ( Didn’t know your name was Kelly🤣)
I know it’s worrying, this virus thing. But really, all we can do is the same as we do in life. Keep ourside of the street clean, ( literally :rofl:) and be vigilant. My main concern is that I don’t carry it to elderly relatives or other vulnerable people.
My eldest has a compromised immune system. She has been told to isolate. She is at home in her student digs.
Just remember, if we drink because of this, we are no good to anyone.
It’s no excuse to panic.

10 Likes

Absolutely and I think drinking would also wreck are immune system making us more septic to it. This virus actually kind of makes me want to drink less, bc I know it’s going to weaken my immune system more, so my plans are to eat healthy, and keep exerciseing so that hopefully I can beat it If something does happen.

7 Likes

I think what scares me is seeing me as the person I am supposed to be without alcohol. Last few times of being sober there was a moment of panic of sorts; like I’m someone I just met and don’t know anything about her.

11 Likes

Hi my name is Natalie and I’m a addict. I’ve had a crap year so far with depression and anxiety and my broken wrist. But I have used my 12 steps programme of recovery and it works ! I never thought I’d be clean i always thought I’d die a junkie I used to pray every day to not wake up I thought my kids was better off without me . Being clean is the best gift I’ve ever given myself and my family even in the past few months of depression I don’t want drugs all I’ve prayed for is to stay clean and deal with what comes my way. I finally see light through the darkness and I couldn’t of done it without my ts family when I couldn’t get to meetings I would read this app and have true friend’s message me it’s lovely to be honest and tell the truth I’m not well please bare with me … now I’m feeling better i want to help as many people as I can in recovery or fighting depression it’s time to give back what u wonderful people have given me . Hope everyone has a blessed day x

17 Likes

I can totally relate to this Donna. :hugs:
I’ve come to terms with the fact that this is just another aspect within this new chapter of my life :woman_shrugging:t3::+1::kissing_heart:

6 Likes

spend some quality time with this new friend and get to know her bc she knows a lot more than you do.

3 Likes

don’t care about the old version but I definitely like the new you.

2 Likes

image

… not sure why I’m up a chimney :thinking::kissing_heart:

8 Likes

Gabe here. And I am a REAL Alcoholic.

I like what you just said about a bad relationship with alcohol and surrendering to that.

I can’t drink like a normal person. Period. I have proven that with every experiment there is. That along with countless studies tell me that I will ALWAYS be this way when it comes to alcohol. This is a progressive disease. It doesn’t go away.

That is why I completely surrendered that fight. Reason tells me that I can’t drink successfully. So today if I chose to drink, I will be abandoning Reason. I will be abandoning logic and common sense. Because I know it won’t be different this time. That has been proven.

Thanks for letting me share

16 Likes

I know I havent been posting here a lot but this is nice bc I’m missing my normal morning meeting bc theres no school(superintendent day, not the virus…YET). I’ll be able to make the evening one where I’ll get my 4 month coin(I like that it’s the only meeting that doesn’t skip from 3mo to 6mo) so I’m looking forward to that.

I guess the reason I haven’t been posting is bc things have been going pretty good for me lately. I’m kind of trying to get away from being on my phone all the time and actually getting out and enjoying life. I finished my 4th and 5th steps, which truly made such a difference in my outlook on life. I finally got out of my workout slump and have been hitting the gym every day(even tho every muscle in my body is exhausted, I know I have to keep moving). Work is slightly picking up again(back to full time after Easter). The only thing that has been bothering me is my bf who still drinks everyday. But it doesn’t make me want to drink, it’s just hard to talk with him sometimes when he does. Hes way too into the news, especially the virus bc he has asthma, and that’s all he ever talks about. And when it comes to my problems I can’t go to him for help. Like @Dolse71 said, they will never understand. I pray one day he will so he can feel the freedom to live one day at a time and not worry too far in the future of ‘what ifs’.

I hope everyone is doing well. I do still read here at least once a day but I’ve gotten to the point where I’m just ready to rebuild and live the life I should be. Which doesn’t include as much screen time. If I ever disappear from here from time to time, assume I’m doing good, bc if I start going downhill I’ll come right back to what saved me in the first place. I’ll never forget how amazing you all are. I would have never been able to do this without you :green_heart:

14 Likes

I will say here Gabe that you were one of the people I listened to 498 days ago.
I listened and took it in because it seemed to be working for you.
Great share buddy.

2 Likes

Thanks man.
Even the village crazy person can be right every now and again. :wink:

4 Likes

Go live your life to the max, isn’t that the whole point. Proud of you. :grin:

3 Likes

Hi, yep Paul again and I’m still an alcoholic. Today I was going to go buy some beer after work and drink it before my Mrs got home and then wash it down with AF lager to hide the smell.
20 years together and never was a secret drinker but now the shame of it drives me to these thoughts, had to phone my sponsor and tell him my thoughts and that’s a first. This app is priceless for an immediate distraction and a long bath with that Peter crouch podcast helped a bit. Don’t know how 126 days can mentally disappear all because of a few drinks and now I gotta totally rewire myself again from scratch. I’m not convinced I won’t drink again and that’s a thought I’m not happy about, I’m taking it one day at a time once again. it’s all I’ve got. thank you.

5 Likes

Yep. My (and most other) group has suspended meetings due to CV. We keep sober and I get drunk! I need my family support which is AA members. I really love sobriety. Never did I believe that it was possible. Life still happens but I am trying to let go of resentments faster, develop more faith and courage and being more honest. I know that it is easier to stay sober than to get sober. My higher power has blessed me with soberity one fay at a time for 4 years.
Thanks for letting me share.Charisse

5 Likes

I found out last night that 2 of the meetings I go to, at the same location, every week are suspended indefinitely bc of CV. Maybe I will be on here a little more often again. My other option to do during the day is the YMCA but who knows how long that’ll stay available. My daughters bday party is supposed to be there on 4/11 and I’m starting to worry that might not happen. They canceled the St. Patrick’s day parade 20 miles from my house(not that I’ve ever gone to it). Parties at my job are canceling bc relatives cant travel. Stores are selling out of toilet paper, diapers, formula, wipes, soap. Some nearby schools have closed. I haven’t been worried about the disease. But I’m starting to worry about what is happening around me. My man has been following the news about it for a month before it made it to the US. I was already sick of hearing about it from him before I heard any other person mention it. Ugh. I’m the type of person that has to get out of the house every day. Idk what I’ll do if more places start closing. I need to buy cat food tomorrow.

@Dolse71, keep at it. You’ve always been an inspiration to me. I have 123 days and you’re responses and posts helped me through some tough times. I know your woman still drinks and I fully understand what it’s like to try and be sober living with it. And getting used to being sober with someone who’s only known the monster inside. I feel like I’m in a completely different relationship now. It fucking sucks sometimes. Anyways, you made it that far, you can do it again man. One day at a time :hourglass_flowing_sand:

4 Likes