I am in day two. The voice in the back of my head keeps telling me that I’m not an addict, I don’t drink every day, I’ve turned down drinks before, but in reality I fit every category of the C.A.G.E. assessment for addiction. I used to work in a rehab and even back then I struggled with alcohol but I felt wrong calling myself an addict. Not because I thought me better than the woman in recovery but because I felt like it minimized their journey to think of myself in any way like them. I did that for years with my other mental health issues, always the “I’m fine, because others are going through more” and I guess that really signifies my self image doesn’t it? I’m rambling at this point, but I don’t really have anyone to talk to besides friends and loved ones who i feel embarrassed to talk to.
Don’t be embarrassed with us, we know how you feel and what your going through. Also try not to compare yourself to others bc the important thing is that you see the improvements in you. But first we have to take a look at our shortcomings and be honest with ourselves so that we can work on them on a daily basis. It’s progress not perfection and you’ve made the most important decision your ever going to make, The decision to change. 
We’re here for you!
Welcome, Brittany, I’m happy you decided to reach out here. I compared myself to others for many years, to feed my denial. I worked in rehab and addiction research settings and always found someone worse off than me to justify coming into work hungover on a regular basis.
It’s going to be okay to talk about the crazy in your head, and the way the addiction pushes us around, getting us to do things, think things, react to things, feel things that we would not otherwise do, think, or feel. You’re an alcoholic or addict if you say you are, independent of anyone else’s judgement.
This is a great place to get and stay sober, I hope you stick around. Here are a couple of great topics to get you started::
and
Blessings on your house 
as you begin your journey.
Thank you for both of those, they gave me some great starting points. The only option I’m familiar with is rehab but I want to try without first. I’m starting to reach a point where I question if I’m nauseous because of just how much I drank when I last drank or if its nerves from what I’m about to undertake. I’m scared but finding this app so early gives me some peace. Everyone has been wonderful already and really make me feel like I’m not making a mountain out of a mole hill like I worry I am.