NoFap - A cry for help

SoberTime has to be the best addiction recovery app available in the Google App Store.
I have been using it for the past year to keep track of my Nofap and Paleo Diet streaks.

But today I create an account regardless of knowing it is unlikely to help. But I am desperate.

I am a 21 year old male, and have been doing NoFap since 2017. I’ve watched the Youtube videos, read the guides and the E-books, tried the methods, and who knows what else. And I still, after 4 year, cannot quit this filth.

I know its killing me, I know its rotting my brain, but I don’t seem to care. Everyday I lose further control over this addiction. This quarantine bullshit hasn’t helped none. It took away all prospects of finding a woman, and I had enough of those.
The worst about this is that I have all the tools in the world to quit, but I don’t want to fight anymore. I know my triggers (overeating, procratination, staying up late) and yet I always find myself in those situations repeatedly.
I don’t believe in my future best self anymore, I can’t make myself care.
I can’t shame myself, or remind myself of the things PMO did to me. Journaling is a futile exercise, the words written don’t have any weight. The passion is fleeting, no matter how many times I read and remind myself of the consequences, I’m always back to it.

If anyone has any advice or strategies that i perhaps haven’t heard of, your input is most appreciated.
Anything at all, I’ll take anything. Any little or weird thing that did it for you, that helped you quit.

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Addiction is a problem, but it isn’t the main problem; addiction is the coping mechanism covering the main problem. Maybe look into what the underlying issues are? That way, the need to cope will be less and abstaining will be easier. Have you tried a twelve-step program? They are very effective and help find out what the underlying issues are.

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Thx :pray: @Cold I have invited you to a message thread we have where you will find many who face a similar challenge, and you will be able to read about things that have helped us.

You are not alone in your struggle. It is possible to overcome it. Porn - like drugs - is a hyperstimulus that lies to us, that tells us we can hide and avoid life. But - like drugs - it ends, and then we are back in real life, and we have to live life on life’s terms.

We have to learn to live life sober. I’m addition to the people on the thread I’ve invited you to, there are valuable resources here:

Don’t ever give up brother. You are a good person who deserves a safe, sober life where you can be your full self. :innocent:

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What is the 12 Step program?

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12 steps is a pattern many groups and people use in recovery. It’s a sequence of steps that takes you from your internal (psychological) recovery & healing work to your external (social, relational) recovery & community / connection work (healing is about connecting in healthy ways with yourself and with others). There’s a good description here - scroll down to the Frequently Asked Questions, and “What is 12 step” is the second one there:

https://p-a.online/

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So the idea is to read the Alcoholics Anonymous’s book and apply the content (12 step program) to PMO?

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@Cold in the earliest post by Matt he has several 12 step groups, they all have their own “big book” and other associated literature, SLAA is the group i attend. Read about some of the different groups and find one that best fits you and attend a meeting, if you’re not comfortable with in person meetings or none are available where you are online meetings are available just about anytime of day.

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No, we have our own book on 12 Step recovery from sex addiction. I recommend attending an SAA meeting. Saa-recovery.org/meetings

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how do i join a particular topic? (newbie).
i am interested in anything that has to do with NoFap, PMO Recovery, getting away from gay porn.
do i join a specific conversation??
thanks