I’m so sorry to hear this Olivia
My condolences
My condolences, remember the good times and smiles together
Wow, I haven’t been updating my thread in ages, it seems!
I’m currently on day 7. Yes, I relapsed with MO. I didn’t go to porn but it still wasn’t ok. My husband forgave me and I’ve been looking into why this happened.
Self hatred and self sabotage. I had other issues going on that I had not dealt with that day. I went in with a clear decision. I wanted the gratification. That’s scary. I don’t count relapse as a part of recovery, BUT if processed and evaluated it can be a valuable lesson. I certainly learnt things.
You and i have talked about this. Needing the gratification, seeking a ‘release.’ knowing that the shame/guilt will come flooding in once were down. Self Hatred/Sabotage have plagued me my entire life. It’s a constant/daily battle to stay self away and communicate your needs. I’m happy that you told your hubby about your setback. I used to do that for years. But ive been hiding my issues for years which has only reinforced my self-hatred, which in turn pushes me to needing a ‘release’ which pushes me to P. The feedback loop of what we tell ourselves is killing us. And yet, i’m happy that you hit 7 days. I’ve learned to treat TS like a journal entry. I’ve journaled enough on my own and i need feedback from my fellow TS folk. You have a great day!
1m 10d
Still here, still truckin. I got a permanent job in the store I’ve been working in as a temp for the last 18 months. Hours could be better but I can always take on extra shifts, so I’m not complaining. After a good long streak I’m having trouble sleeping again so I need to make adjustments. I hope I’ll bounce back to my regular rhythm quickly. First snow and freezing temps mean that winter is coming. It’s ok, tho, as long as it’s not horizontal sleet LOL.
Congratulations on the job!!! Horizontal sleet = ouchy to the face!!!
How are my fellow pmo addicts holding up?