Well done bud! Good to see you again!
Howdy folks, Iâve gone 6 months without alcohol. I have a new job. I havenât got any serious problems with people or life in general. And Iâm currently in a hospital. My gf is giving labor to our daughter 
Sobriety to all!
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I do that ALL the time! Reply to old threads. 
someone somewhere gives you gifts you thought you didnât deserve. My Sobriety medal is healthy and gorgeous
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My 7 month Sobriety ended shortly after my last post⌠1 Month later 25th July, I was walking out of the detox. My legs were wobbly and eyes half shut. Wrists in my pockets looking for a cornershop to buy a pack of cigarettes. A friend was willing to pick me up and drive me home, but he was coming a bit later. I noticed there is an alcohol shop on the corner of the same house I just had spent my night on IV and under sleeping pills. I walked in and asked if they sold cigarettes. Well they didnât⌠I bought 4 cans of beer, walked out and sat under a tree. Drank one and found another shop on Google maps, that was couple of minutes walk. Bought my fags and sat under the tree again to wait for my ride, had the second beer. Soon the car arrived and took me home witch is an hour and a half drive. Rode my bicycle to the local shop the same afternoon and got myself a six-pack. Promised myself that these are the last ones. Last ones for this stupor. Woke up next morning and been sober since.
This last drinking started when I was home alone one evening. When I found out I was alone, I figured, I should buy few beers and enjoy ME time. Next eve, I thought, since nothing bad happened and I slept well, went to work and felt happy, I shouldnât worry much and just keep the amount of alcohol on a six-pack. So every night I had my six beers. First malfunction was after the weekend, when I of course doubled my intake. But I survived, went to work and rewarded with six-pack after job. So after three weeks of playing this functional alcoholic I was tired. I was just so tired, pessimistic, sad, hopeless and I called in Monday morning, said I was not coming to work. I wasnât even that much hangover or that. Just wanted to quit. After couple of hours I drove out to the next city and got my car packed with beer. Next thing I know- I was in my familiar state. Drink till you fall down, wake up until you fall asleep and to it over and over again⌠until one moment nothing helps, headache, stomach pain etc get too hard to continue. So I went and asked my neighbour to drive me to the clinic.
7th of August I had disulfiram antabus implanted. I felt that it might help me be more disciplined, dose for 2 years.
But⌠even with this story, Im glad that I have had so many sober days this year. Its more than I had in my previous 20 years and it only September.
Every sober day is a day lived for life.
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Thanks for the update @Rosenberg.
This has been hard for you. Iâm sorry.
I love antibuse. If they made it for porn addicts, I would definitely be taking it.
How your baby doing?
My baby is great! Her smile makes all troubles go away. Really peaceful child.
She really brings out the sun, but also I worry about her. Probably because I care so much, and I see how tender she is, and I worry a lot for her well being.
I was driving my son back to her motherâs today, and my partner and baby came along for a ride. And I had some car issues, and I started to worry again. Its a 4h trip and right at the beginning something felt odd, pretty bad vibration, like one of the wheels wasnât balanced. So it started bothering me, after half an hour just like that the salon heater died. I feel its my responsibility to protect my girls, and I get irritated. (is it warm enough to breastfeed, hope it stops raining etc) Its no Florida here in Estonia. It raining and cold and windy. And windows get foggy and by 7pm itâs dark outside- even colder. Luckily we managed to be back home by sunset and it went well.
I mean if it had been only me in the car, I would have taken it much easier, but since they came along it was stressful. And they werenât supposed to come it was a last minute call she decided to join. So I was a bit mad at her, because if sheâd stayed home with the baby, Iâd have had easier drive
Itâs 78 days sober tonight. Been thinking about beer a lot lately. Like âyeah sure I will never ever not touch this crap in my whole life againâ, and after 5 minutes wondering how I could start binge drinking daily. Or planning a high salary office job, and then the motivation would be to buy myself a recreational vehicle, and black out alone for a month in some parkinglot.
So nothing stable. One day at the time.
154th day sober.
About a month ago went back to my AA group. Then joined another group that is 15min drive from my house. Meetings are held only once a week there thou.
I dont have too many carvings today, just sometimes random thoughts to start drinking right away, but I dont have any alcohol near me
I dont see the point to start drinking small quantities, I wouldnt enjoy that. I still like the idea of buying as much beer as would fit in my car and then black out for couple of weeks and end up in a hospital. Im absolutley not afraid of that. Kind of made peace in my mind that If this has to be done, it has to be done. I know it sounds super stupid, and I hope, when come back to this thread after few months I will understand also how my mind was lost here.
Ive decided to stay sober at least until my antabuse effect should wear off. The drugs were surgigally placed in my muscles with a doctors warning to stay off booze for 24 months. Personally I dont even belive they have any effect but who am i to question our medical sience
Maybe after 24 months sober I dont want to go back drinking, maybe⌠But today I feel comfortable that I dont have to drink, because I have decided to stay sober for some period.
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All you have to do is stay sober for one day at a time.
It doesnât sound like youâve fully surrendered to alcohol as youâre already planning a future drink. Hopefully it will come to you in time when your mental obsession will be removed
Get to meetings! Get a sponsor! And work the steps. It only works if you truly donât want to drink again though
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One year sober.
With tears in my eyes I receved one year chip tonight.
Realisation how my life has changed for the better in the last 12 months made me really emotional.
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What a beautiful journey!! So happy for you on your year!!! Such an accomplishment!!!
Thatâs wonderful! Congratulations! 
Outstanding!
Every night, I take my clothes off, tuck myself between the pillows and blanckets and reach my hand to my phone and open this app.
Daily routine.
Some nights I just browse meme thread, but usually surf thru New posts that catch my eye.
My sober time is almost half a thousand days now. And Im learning to live everyday.
I returned to my job I had to leave in 2013 because of my drinking, and I got my position back. They pay me well and company car is a big bonus for 240km/150miles drive everyday.
Some days I have lots of stress and I feel like I cant bare it anymore, but I have learned to calm myself down. I know all will pass, next day will be better. I have learned to talk to my higher power and ask for strenght and relief. I have learned to thank my HP. I have learned to notice the mercy I have receved.
I attend AA meetings as much as possible with the virus restrictions. But I feel my actions and decisions are in accordance with the 12 step program.
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I noticed that I havenât written here for a year.
Im an alcoholic that doesnt drink. I dont take it for granted, So I remind my self every day, that the foundation of me is me not picking up. I attend 2-3 AA meetings a week and these are the Best parts of my day. 2.5 years ago I used to think that my life was about to be over in a near future. I didnt think I had lived it wrong, I had lived it by best of my knowlidge. New friends in the room and the big book started to teach me something different and the world lost one unice bastard of an alcoholic, who could have drank more and more until his death on a skid-row, lyeing on his belly in the rain in a cold on a november night. Word death illustrates this situation too neatly.
Serenity⌠Its a currency I wouldnt exchange for anything, and I can say that I feel I have peacefulness. Im grateful for that.
And today Im thinking that I want to build a house. I have earned some money and I have invested it. I treated my self today with two choclate ice-creams.
That worked today, but I can build a house if i want. Cant I 
My life is not over jet. Im nearly half way thru, turning 40 soon.
But my life has changed, everything in it has changed.
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Loved seeing this post. Congrats on your sobriety! Things can only get better!
Great post! Inspiring!!
Thanks for sharing this! Just what I needed this morning 
This New thing that Im doing- not drinking has gone pretty far.
I didnt drink today and off to bed now, So if all goes as he wants, then Iâll have 4 digits under my belly tomorrow morning.
Thank you for a sober day!
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In hope to keep this thread pretty boring from now on, I checked in to mark that Iâm still on this sober journey and I have no desire to pick up a drink today Although I have been sober for nearly 3.5 years now. I doesnât matter. Important is to put my head on the pillow tonight sober.
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