Partner resentment

I’m sober for 42 days this time. I’m coming out of the fog and loving being sober. I really believe this time is real. My main issue is my partner of 19 years can’t forgive me for all my drunken years. He won’t let go of it. He says he wants to make me pay for all the pain I’ve caused him. I don’t know how to move forward if he continu es to hold on to this resrntment.

I didn’t cheat or anything like that.

That’s great you decided to get sober and congrats on your days. Give him some (a lot) of time to come around that this is sticking for you. He stuck things out for 19 years, I’m sure you could give him sometime to forgive you? Show him change with actions, not words, every day. And soon (a while) he will stop waiting for things to get messy and start believing you and trusting you.


Our drinking effects people close to us and sometimes there is anger when you stop drinking , there is al anon for sober partners dont know if hed go meet other people whos partners have a drink problem wish you well


Too early in your recovery to worry about your amends. Just focus on you being sober first. The rest will play itself out. Years of betrayal or damage you caused will not melt away in 42 days… Be patient and work on what keeps you sober…


Has he ever heard of living in the moment? Tomoro is not promised so what is the point in holding grudges and exspesh dragging out the past with your parter. If your partner can’t get over what has been done then why are they with you? I wouldn’t put up with that at all its crap if u ask me.

Thank you I need a voice of reason. :blush:

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