I wanted to ask what benefits people have experienced from quitting PMO. I am planning to quit PM but I still want to have sex. Do you think its possible? Thanks for the advice.
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Beast, you are on the other side my friend. A place I could hardly imagine some years ago. Congratulations on 6 weeks and keep going strong.
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No guilt in serious relationship is #1 for me, I cannot do this to my wife or set this example for my son
Sexual appetite normalizes/fetishes disappear. This was huge for me because I thought I was a creep until I realized it was all basically a weird hallucination. Or I’m just getting old.
No erectile dysfunction
No more nightmares/terrors? Basically sleeping improved 1000%
Not distracted when doing important things that are hard like reading/studying - never have to stop to do that (like it’s going to help) and then just get really tired and fall asleep
No search history deleting/paranoia
No getting caught/sneaking
More time
More motivation for self improvement
More dopamine for other things (I think, not sure but I suspect it gets wasted on pmo)
That’s for me, not sure if other people have had other benefits. Edit, added one.
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I think that there have to be boundaries to it. I don’t necessarily want to put my values off on you, but I feel that if you’re not married then engaging in sex only may not be advantageous in cutting off pornography and masturbation, and even then you want to have some sort of boundaries with your spouse that protect the integrity of your sex life.
As far as benefits….
- Guilt-free
- Clarity
- Increased focus, creativity
- You don’t feel PMO is something you have to do for comfort, fulfillment or relief.
- Lots of energy
Welcome! I am so thankful for the strong community of sobriety from PMO on this forum. I am still trying to get into it more myself. I particularly have really enjoying using the daily check in thread to just get my thoughts out of my head for the day! Keep going!
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To your question is it ok to have sex while quitting PM…
It depends. Are you single or in a relationship? If you have a SO that you’re intimate with, then you need to have conversations. There are no textbook answers. If you’re single, I would recommend you take a break from sex for a while. It’s really easy to swap an addiction from one to another - like if you gave up PM you could end up finding your fix elsewhere. That’s why finding help/programme and working on the reasons why you’re addicted is so important and really the only way to break the cycle.
It’s been about six months since you last posted on this thread. How’s it been? Has something changed?
There are literally no downsides to not doing it.
I’m close to my 60 days as well! You may still experience withdrawal as well as temptation, but the goal is to keep going one moment at a time!
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Congrats on your progress. I’m not sure if bloating is a withdrawal symptom of PMO. Could be a number of things. If it affects your breathing, maybe consult your health care provider. All the best to you.
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Hello everyone if there’s anyone available to help me start this journey and work my way through it that would be a big help I have had a wake up call recently and would really like to give up this horrible stuff before I let it take control of my life any further I have been really depressed over it recently and have not been feeling like myself and just really need some people going through the same thing to help me through this thank you and please don’t be shy to reply to me I could really use the help I’m 25 btw
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I feel just overwhelmed by feelings of self discuss and hatred because I have just let this thing run on for so long and get out of control it’s starting to effect me mentally and I hate that and really just want to stop it now and become a better person for myself and feel like it’s okay not to hate myself for being this way and I just want a change
I know thanks but I just feel so disgusted with everything I have seen online and I can’t stand feeling this way anymore and I just don’t know how I’m every gonna stop feeling this deep hatred and despair in my chest
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It feels like I’ll never get past this but I really want to try and make myself feel better again and it’s nice to see other people be supportive
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Welcome to the forum. I’m sorry you struggle with this. You are a brave person to to admit you have a problem. That’s the starting point for recovery. Humility and brutal honesty.
This forum is a venue for peer support, to share life and to cheer others on. If you’re looking for one-on-one mentorship then I would suggest some form of therapy or a recovery programme. When I started my recovery I read, read and read around this forum and that was very helpful. It was so relieving to be around people who are addicts too. I learnt a lot.
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I really think I should this addiction has led me to some dark places and I’m finally ready to make a change and stop feeling this way do you have any recommendations for therapy and things or websites or places I could go to that specializes in this sort of thing
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I didn’t think that was a problem, it’s not hurting anyone
Hi…
I wanted to encourage you about your recovery process and inner healing….
You’re off to a greasy start! You’ve admitted that you have a problem and that problem has caused you to feel less than what and who you are meant to be and that you need help in overcoming! That’s usually the hardest part, but it is at this point that the problem ( the addiction) loses power.
There is a certain freedom in knowing that our addiction doesn’t have to control our lives, and there is great power to overcome our addiction in community and accountability. Being in community and accountability requires you to be H.O.T…. Humble (and Honest) Open and Transparent… and a certain amount of faith, trust and grace… Because when you’ve decided to pursue recovery and freedom, your addiction will fight to keep its hold, but ultimately YOU choose the kind of life you want to live…
Please know that you will be tempted! But there a way of escape!
Please be mindful that the tools and tricks that keep us in addiction may form, but they DON’T have to prosper!
Please know that this journey will not be easy, there will be bumps and cuts and scrapes, but the freedom of sobriety is SO WORTH IT!
Please know that you have a village here walking it out right beside you!!! So forgive yourself, receive forgiveness and let’s walk it out.
You are loved and treasured and valued…
Grace and Peace to you….
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Thank you so much you started making me tear up but the hardest part for me through this whole thing is gonna be the forgiveness Im still not in the right state of mind for that and it’s hard to imagine ever getting there because I just feel so disgusted with myself ATM and it’s really starting to show recently with how I am around other people and I feel really awful about it and everyone’s constantly asking me if I’m okay and I I’m can’t just come out and tell them what’s eating alive inside so I have to just say no I’m fine and I feel like it just makes it hurt me more inside