Great job!
3 Likes
Love the kitty!
3 Likes
@Von100 the fact you are here and trying is a point of hope. this is no magic but we are no determined to fail. all my support and admiration for your fighter spirit
1 Like
Thanks, that is the plan! I have for a few years in row stated I don’t want to be drinking by Christmas this year. And I’m well on my way to that, drinking is a zero option for me and when the thought come, I will just have to fight it through. I can keep this going😀.
2 Likes
Wow, 25 days have past since my last drink(s) because it was never just one, it was more like one bottle.
I’m so happy to be here and being able to say, I have 25 days in of not slowly killing myself.
I actually feel like I’m living a life. I enjoy waking up hang over free (even if it is before the roosters 
get up),and going to bed early getting some much need rest. I think the puppies love it to because they get extra loves now and stead of passed out mom!
I’m so happy that I made a choice earlier this month to get away and deal with myself. It was the best thing I’ve done in a very long.
It give me the time to see that I did have it in me to stay sober!!! And search my own soul and see I truly wanted to stop drinking and I was able too. It give me time under my feet that I just was not willing to lose again. And helped me to be strong for when I got home. And the time to stop linking my sobering up, to the other half quitting or not.
I came home ten days sober and drinking firmly not option in my mind!!
I told Hubby, I was done with the drinking! And he could do, what he wanted to do. That he needed to him and I was going to do me! Though I did add, I don’t see how this continues works, if I’m sober and your not. ( and truly meant this and mean this. Not that I want to end us at all but …)
Well, I am happy to say, Hubby hit his two weeks yesterday. I’m happy for him!!! I wish all the best for him and hope for continue sobriety for him.
But I know that our sobriety is!!!, Each our OWN sobriety!! (Thank you to peeps that, said this to me, it truly was game changer in my mind) And I will always make sure to keep this in my mind.
I realize that I was not living a life at all!!!, drinking every night and definitely it was not fun and fact it was boring! Just sitting there night after night, pouring drinks down my pie hole until I would pass out.
Look back at my early journey and getting to these 25 DAYS!!!. It was not easy!! And 
wow! I have come so far. I’m proud of myself for getting here. It was definitely a battle to get here to this point. BUT I am so GLAD I’m here and excited for my 25 DAYS !!
I will keep my journey simple and continue working on staying sober one day at time, not thinking in forever terms. Only to have my everyday goal, as simple, as just to get my head on the pillow sober, at the end of the day!! (thank you for this advice it literally saved my life)
And I know that my alcohol demon 
brain 
is still there because it does poke at me from time to time ( and will always be there ). Sometimes just a little poke and sometimes a BIG strong 
poke!
But I will keep the fighting that fight and I will win!!! Over this stupid, killing, lying, alcoholic demon brain of mine!
As drinking is just not option for me anymore!!!
10 Likes
I love it too!
1 Like
I’m late to the party 
Congrats on 30 days!!
1 Like
@Von100 congrats! 
It’s amazing how you did it and managed 30 days, well done! Wish you all the best in recovery
1 Like
Made it through my first holiday sober! It has been a long time since I handed out candy to the little ones not being half lite. It was so very nice, can remember doing it and the big bonus waking up hang over free.
The demon alcohol brain has being strongly poking at me a lot the last couple days. But I will not let it win! Maybe it is reaching the 30 day milestone(which I have read it is a thing). But I will not give up and I’m going to get my 60days!!
I love being in the land of living!
Instead of just sitting around drinking my night away (LIFE) until I passed out and to wake through the night feeling like I was dying!! Because I was!!! And being 
sick, hangover all day and thinking I was dying all the time. Only to turn around in the afternoon and start the crazy train again.
That is no life at all. Alcohol is a lying demon !!!
10 Likes
Your story really resonated with me. The first post from you that I read was when you were having to hit that reset button. I made it 10 days and then in the past week I have reset three times. It fucking sucks. I just saw recent post from you that you made it 30 days. Congratulations. How did you do it? What were some of the top things that you changed in order to make it those 30 days? I’d love your feedback and help in my journey. It is a difficult one.
1 Like
Superb effort
Hi @Sdwc that’s a good question, a hard one to answer even after thinking about it. I hope this finds you one more day sober. Starting day 34 for me!
After many years with same comments Tomorrow we can start day one! I don’t want to be drinking by Christmas this year. Only to find myself drinking still,
.
I believe, I was truly dieing and would be lucky to see another year if I kept it up. Not that stopped me in the past.
So what was different this year, this day one!
I think, for one, I did deep down inside I really wanted it for myself. and in hangover 
morning, feeling desperate to stop. I went out online to found some kind help for myself, online AA as I’m definitely shy and was scared to go in person.
I came across this app and like the the day count feature. Thinking it would help movitive me, I download to my phone.
But then I started to poke around the app a little more and read @Cjp story which I saw a lot of myself in her story. And how she was able to get off the merry go around. This inspired me and give me hope for myself.
I started actively, filling my mind with alcoholism information. Come on here reading other stories of struggle and successes. This help, me to realize that the struggle is real and I’m not the only one.
I mean, I know wasn’t alone because I had my drinking buddy ( the hubby) but I saw that we weren’t the only couple out there doing the crazy train. Not I thought that we were.
I started, my own story journey on here, to share myself and have some thing to looked back on in a moment of weakness.
Which it has help me. Not the first couple times. But it definitely does now, as I don’t want to go back to crap.
I had quite a few stumble’s and resetting my clock the first month or so. But I really did want to get sober. I WANTED to Live.
(Me writing this just now reminds me that there were several nights, over this year in my drunken stupor that would started telling my hubby
“I’m dying, I’m serious if don’t stop now I’m going to die soon, I didn’t want to die. Its going to suck for you having to tell the grandkids I’m dead because Grammy couldn’t/wouldn’t stop drinking” )
I got away from my drinking buddy (on my day four which was the day, we would normally slip again if, we even made it that far. That and i was just still really pissed at him from the recent days events). So, off to the beach I went to gather myself, have some me time and do some serious life reflection.
And to keep my days going by myself. I was determined and wanted to get through day four. And if failed it would be all on me, and only me!! I did make through that night and I kept at it from there gaining more tools and knowledge about my alcoholic demon brain, to help me on my path to a better life.
And that was my last reset for me, and will be the last of my life.( and yes I know relapses happen and i will have to work on being sober every day)But, I can’t give myself one inch in my mind because that is how I tick. So again! Drinking is not an option anymore for me! I’m not losing my days!
So I realize as I wrote this it became more journal of my journey and trying to answer “how did I do it”
I think every ones journey is different and what works for you, in the ends worked for you. But I think there some common things that we all have done.
And if I made a list for myself of what it was that worked this time, it would be something like
-Pure determination/ can do this attitude
-Learning about alcoholism ( alcoholism literature, pod casts, AA
- seeking help( me it has been here)
-the understanding my sobriety is mine only
-not thinking in forever terms ( forever terms makes me want it more)
-just get my head to my pillow sober one night at time - giving my addiction a name/identity (Alcoholic Demon Brain )
- get day counter and the motivation of not losing time
- having the feeling of accountability
- earning milestone tokens
-being active in sober Community everyday that gets it
And the biggest one- Drinking Alcohol is NO LONGER a option (it is and will KILL me sooner then later)
2 Likes
I’m struggling today a lot! Shut up demon Brain! Did a puzzle for awhile, Drinking coffee, and reading around here but it just keeps poking! Ugh😩
3 Likes
Sorry to hear you struggling. A walk, music or just share more are suggestions. I am here!
2 Likes
Do you rather need distraction or staying with your feelings?
1 Like
I also tried
Start a project
Go back to skool for a short course to keep your mind studying not thinking
I had tears in my eyes as I was reading this. It sounds so much like my situation. Except the fighting part. We just sailed off into our own little orbits and forgot about each other.
My grandkids mean so very much to me and I gave up so much time with them so I could drink.
Now they are teenagers and I am trying to establish relationships and it’s not easy. You don’t want to let that happen to you!
I am feeding my mind daily with positive reinforcement of all the reasons to not have to reset.
I love Annie Grace’s books!
1 Like