Welcome Samuel! 
Mental illness / mental health and addiction go together soooooo often. So often. It’s one of the greatest problems in the world today. Millions of lives torn apart because addiction is something we discovered by accident - usually we discovered it when we were young and found it numbed us, “relieved” us - but eventually we realize it has buried us.
The good news is there’s something you can do. I would do two things:
- Connect with a recovery program and stick with it: Resources for our recovery or Online meeting resources
- Find mental health resources in your country.
Where do you live? We may be able to find some links.