I’m making this topic for those of us on here that are struggling with our addiction to sex/porn/mastrubation. While others are free to add and comment, I’m hoping this can be a place that we can turn to when we are feeling tempted to slip up, and need someplace to vent or find support.
I’m feeling tempted right now as I write this, that is why i’m doing this. I’m afraid if I don’t, I’ll just look up some porn and mess up my almost 2 day streak.
So, for anyone out there having a hard time of thing, and want someone to talk things out with, I’m here. I’ll be checking back at this frequently so as to stay strong.
To a large extent, I totally understand what you are saying and why you’re here, seeking support. Whilst I am an alcoholic, we are both pretty much in the same situation - that is, finding some way of taking away our “pain” and changing the way we feel. For me, alcohol used to do that; for you, it’s sex/porn.
Basically, I just wanted to say that you’re probably in the right place and be open-minded to the fact that addicts like us (whether its sex, drugs, alcohol, rock ‘n’ roll or whatever) need the support of others to deal with the feelings that our addictions create within us.
All we are seeking is someone else to understand how we feel, and help support us in our recovery. I can certainly identify with that.
Sorry if I made it sound like I felt like sex addiction is like a club lol.
I’m glad to hear from anyone. I just noticed that when I looked for a sex addict page i didn’t find one. So I thought I would make one so anyone else looking could find one
I’m glad there is a place we can turn to to find the strength of others to help when we are feeling weak.
Hi, no not at all just making a comparison… there are so many different addictions its not funny. We are all the same really we just have a different addiction.
It’s been a while that I’ve realized I had this addiction, but only recently that I’m taking steps to stop. Uplifting to see I’m not the only one,and good luck!
I know how that feels, I’m back on day one from yesterday. I somehow convince myself that I’ve gotten so far into relapsing that I might as well go through with it instead of turning back. Thankfully, I feel I came out of today stronger and wiser. I plan on using this app more frequently for inspiration, and to become stronger in detecting and blocking urges
Hi everyone. I’m Mario and I just signed up. I’m a 10 year porn and masturbation addict. I’m 26 btw. I’ve wasted thousands on it and it has literally made me numb to core. I want to kick this bad habit forever and START enjoying my life once and for all. I look forward to progressing with you guys.
I’m an alcoholic but that doesn’t mean to say I haven’t had other addictions aswell, I’v found in my recovery that i’v had plenty! Sex was an obsession of mine for a while and I realise now that my obsession and ‘need’ for sexual relationships/encounters was destructive to others and to myself. Even when I got sober from alcohol and had lost a long term relationship as a result of my drinking I was still seeking to full that void in my life and literally within a couple of days of leaving rehab I was having sex not thinking much of it thinking it was normal to want to have sex. I’v learnt now that I used sex as a way to fix my feelings, a distraction from dealing with my feelings and focusing on what I should have been focusing on and a form of control. It took months in my sobriety from alcohol and drugs to learn this about my relationship with sex and do what I needed to do which was to leave it alone and focus on myself but I got there, begrudgingly at first but I’m ok with it now
Hi
I’m on the same road.
Use the app every day. I like the inspirational quotes. Almost at 7 days free of the monster now. Just trying one day at a time. Sometimes one minute at a time. I’m determined to be free of it this time.
Getting up and about is the key.
If you work from home as I do, i recommend working from a library instead.
Stay busy!
I’m in a similar boat, my problem is with drinking but my BF’s sex addiction ( porn masturbations and prostitutes) was a big wake up call when it came to light. It also has me reviewing my own relationship with sex…as well as quitting drinking.
It’s sad to think that that may be the only / real reason why we were brought into each others lives but it’s better than the way we were living.
I’m 32 and have been using sex and porn compulsively to deal with emotional pain since I was in my teens. Not only has it lead me to extreme avoidance, but my body feels destroyed after a session. I quit drugs with the snap of a finger but sex is my real demon. I hope some day to have a healthy relationship to sex, but for now I need to cut it out and face my issues head on. No more opening a tab or going on the dating site when I feel depressed or tired.
I’ve noticed the pattern of how I lose all control. It can start with the most inocuous thing, like seeing an old bookmark or an auto complete on my browser. It seems like such a small thing to just check it out briefly (I tell myself just for a second). But it’s like spinning up a flywheel. The first action, though it seems the smallest, is actually the largest, because it overcomes the inertia and starts the flywheel spinning. Then the actions accumulate until the flywheel is spinning with enormous momentum and I can do nothing but watch helplessly as I destroy myself.
For me, a big part of this doing my best to clean my environment of triggers (re install OS, get rid of bookmarks, auto complete, etc), and also realizing deeply that the smallest initial action is actually the biggest thing. Also, not getting complacent when I feel great and have a lot of energy, as it’s always right after that when I have an emotional struggle that I turn to sex, and my energy that I built up is released destructively.
Yeah, same. Getting out of the house even just for a walk is very important. And having the courage to face the things that we’ve been using sex to avoid.
Hey Tim, welcome to the forum. There are a few lust addicts, myself included, that frequent this place. Sounds like you have experience kicking other habits, congrats on that. Did you recently realize you had a problem with sex or have you been working on recovery in this area for a while? Do you go to meetings?
I identify heavily with your flywheel analogy, that’s a good one. I also identify with what you said about emotional struggles driving to sex. I know that’s true for me. I’m in the process of moving across the country and the stress has been a real trigger for me. I also struggle with isolation as a trigger and saying goodbye to friends has been hard.
Thanks for the welcome. I’ve known it’s a problem for a while, maybe two years. Isolation and loneliness can be a trigger for me, too. I have friends but sometimes it’s hard to get out. I’ve tried to abstain many times, but never succeeded past a few weeks max. Often ending with a binge involving porn and seeking sex until I get it. It could be worse, but my body feels so twisted and awful for days after, and there are lots of longer term effects that hound me.
This time I’m going to make a point of trying to be more aware of my emotions, when I’m weak and suseptible especially. I’ll go out for a walk or call a friend or just get away from my phone and computer and lie down and try to process. I’m not currently in a support group. Hope this forum will help though.
Hey @Tim2. Just wanted to let you know that I am here also with very similar issues. I know this is hard but at least you recognize that it’s a problem and are looking for help and support.
Just know that you are not alone. I have found that changing routines and just keeping busy helps. Also if you can get to any SA meetings that might help you.
Thanks Ray. I read all of your thread yesterday and it helped a lot. I’ve always tried to hide this part of me, and it’s caused so many emotions to be bottled up. Just typing it out here and having people who are going through the same thing and are here for support feels great. I’ll be coming here daily and checking in whenever I feel the emotional precursors or cravings.
I’ve been crying a lot recently, which I never used to do before, and I think it’s a good thing. I’m processing and slowly opening up to myself. My clarity and willpower are stronger than before, and I’m optimistic. But of course it’s just when I’m feeling on top of the world that I let my guard down, so I know that I must always be vigilant; like Rome at the height of the empire, if I get complacent then inevitably the barbarians will come rushing back in.
☉:full_moon_with_face:
