The urge to act out with pmo was weighing heavily on me lastnight after I woke up midway through an action movie and saw that I was aroused. The intial thoughts were to just give in and see it through to completion but the sober side of me knew what would take place if I had gone through it. I struggled for what seemed like forever but may have only been a few minutes before I decided to reach out to someone. I know after speaking to my sponsor that these waves of urges, feelings and thoughts will come at a moments notice and not care about me. The obsession and addiction want to rule and dictate how I should go through life but I no longer want to give in to those temptations. TFLMS
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Philip,
Have you read Easy Peasy yet?
I have not. I’ll check it out. Thank you
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I definitely played a game of chicken and tempted fate last night. I got to searching and scrolling online looking at fitness models and then trying to find any old pics I may have in my archives just to feel some form of connection. I’d say I think it’d be comparable to finding hidden bottlea in your house, lining them up and juat staring at them until you decoded to eother drink or put them back. I didnt act out with pmo but it felt like teetering and maybe sloght edging. I wanted to bring this to light as a reminder that those lustful feelings and thoughts do tend to creep in. I recognize that is not a postove behavior that will lead to me keeping my recovery.
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