Your husband sounds so much like mine at the beginning of my sobriety journey. He did not get it and wanted to be supportive and thought he was, but he wasn’t. And I really didn’t know for a long while what exactly I needed from him re support. Like what was mine and what was his, you know?
We started out as drinking and drug buddies about 27 years ago, so I get all that.
I could write on this forever…instead I will share some old threads that maybe will give you some stuff to think about. Always happy to discuss via PM as well if you’re interested. Anyway…take a look here and see if anything resonates…