I’m sober, but still miserable. Wondering what the point is…I’ve cut off my old life to be sober and now sit or sleep the hours of the day away directionless. Is this what it is supposed to be like?
12 Likes
i went to meetings made new sober friends filled my days ,joined a gym filled my days , wish you well . nothing happens if you do nothing
15 Likes
When I got sober, I was afraid the days were going to be like that - gray, drab, endless. Then a couple of things happened. First, after a few weeks, the alcohol completely left my system and the acute and post-acute withdrawal phase passed. My body felt strange without booze, and reacting to life sober started to become tolerable, even natural feeling. Second, I started intense work, in individual counseling and in AA, on myself and my sobriety. And, of course, my favorite topic is me! It was the start of feeling hope, and I was genuinely interested in who I had become under booze and how I got there.
Blessings on your house 
as you begin your journey today.
15 Likes
Congrats on becoming sober Finley. And welcome to Talking Sober. Being sober will not solve our problems but it is the first condition to work on a better life. And yes, a better life, a good life takes work. That goes for all people.
In active addiction I hung around, waiting for something from outside to make me feel better. Drugs and alcohol in particular. But it didn’t work, or only for a short while. All that did was anesthetize me. And when I woke up I was hungover and in need of more anesthetic. A vicious circle.
To get out of that circle the first step is stopping using and drinking. Which you done, so that’s great! Now the next step is to start working on your journey of recovery. What are you gonna do to make your life better? What does your life need? I can’t say that for you, but one thing I do know is that I couldn’t do it alone.
The opposite of addiction is connection. Connection to other people, to my sober peers first, and now I’m working on connection to other people as well. It’s work but it’s a work of love. To yourself in the first place. Wishing you all success.
19 Likes
congratulations on your sobriety. I’ve been sober for 5 months it was very hard at first, its hard now but i know this is the best thing i could have ever done. Just continue to push forward. Its worth it.
7 Likes
Ive cut alot of people off since i got sober and it is difficult, i deal with loneliness too but i feel like the its better than the alternative…sobriety doesnt automatically fix everything but it gives you the opportunity to craft a healthy and addiction free life for yourself…theres no time limit on this so take time to get to know yourself again…what makes you happy etc and go about enriching your life…afterall life is what you make it
9 Likes
Well perhaps you should read up here a bit. Get some ideas, put in some work to enjoy sobriety.
Sobriety as is life will be you get what you put into it. Do nothing, well you know.
Welcome to the forum, just joining isn’t the gig here. Getting involved and learning from others is what makes it great.
Best of 
7 Likes
Thanks all. I appreciate all of your comments. Some of your words struck a chord, which is a good thing. I’m going to make connections a priority, because I am definitely isolating and wallowing. I’m also dealing with depression and an eating disorder. It feels reassuring to know that there are people out there who can relate. Thanks for the welcome and be well!
15 Likes
That part is up to you. Using was an escape, something to do. Your brain is adjusting too. Things seem enjoyable when our neurochemistry allows for.
The secret is that life is just life. I tried so hard to have a grand purpose but you’ve got to enjoy sunsets and fresh air and it’s nowhere as exciting as using but it’s so much more peaceful.
Technology does this to us too. A lot of us have problems sitting with our thoughts for any extended period.
1 Like
I feel the same way but i know it is my body adjusting to this new thing called no alcohol. The cloudy days are only temporary until our body heals. I too have cried constantly, been in bed 2 days straight. Today i decided to get up and i cleaned my house and took my dogs on a walk. It wasnt as fun as being drunk but fuck it felt so much better! Keep going. It sucks now but it wont forever.
3 Likes
Welcome to TS 
Lots of good sharings already. What still helps me is taking it ODAAT. Every babystep counts. Some days it’s many, some days I’m grateful my greatest achievement was running the dishwasher. Keep going and focus on what you CAN do - then do it, one by one. Breaking down tasks in smaller tasks is an everyday gamechanger for me … yes, because every small task counts
Life is lifey, be kind to yourself when depression & addiction voices try to talk you down. It will pass.
6 Likes
Thank you so much for your words and the flower. This really helped me and I agree about this lifey thing we call life!!
1 Like
How are you doing today @Finley68 ? It’s the weekend and sometimes it can be a hard time so I wanna give you a shoutout 
2 Likes
I think the sense of feeling directionless is a common experience… But also now a wonderful opportunity to think what would u like to do with your time?
I found reading helped… Listening to vinyl records again was a blessing… And just giving my self time to process getting rid of the alcohol from my body but then also the time to almost grieve it all too? The future is bright. U just need to be bold and explore it in a different way
1 Like
How nice to wake up to this message. Thank you. Ups and downs on the weekend. So far so good because I have my first cup of coffee of the day and my chihuahua babies on my lap. It’s literally hour by hour with me. The sun is shining in through the window. I’m trying to keep everyone’s wise words forefront in my mind. Today is day 61. How are you?
5 Likes
Awww, doggo love and coffee 
best way to start the weekend!
taking it minute by minute is a fine ODAAT. just keep going, congrats on 61 days. around milestones there can occur triggers and irritations, you can look up milestone maladie as keyword if you are interested. maybe some of this hit you a bit too.
I’m fine, thanks for asking. Like we joked about on the friday thread: lame nerdy sober weekend ahead. that’s wonderful, lame, boring & nerdy is the new cool 
Friday Thread #3 - #1265 by Steve14
Have a good read around here, lotsa information, good shares and distraction. as you drink coffee maybe have a look at the coffee thread(s), I liked it very much. the daily check in thread is always busy and you are welcome to share gratitude on the gratitude thread if you like.
wish you an ok-ish sober weekend!
4 Likes