I have, very recently, decided to take control of my sobriety. I have never tried to get sober before but I’m at the point where if I don’t try, I’m afraid where my life is headed…or not headed. I can’t think of one good thing in my life right now even though I’m sure there are many. It just feels very lonely and I’m really done being sad. I’m not where I thought nor wanted to be in my life. I am just looking for any support I can find at this point to help me get through this.
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You’re in the right place. This whole forum is just that: Sharing, listening, responding. There are posts that are serious, mundane, humorous, amongst others.
Read a lot, post often. I am glad you’re here.
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Thank you so much!
Welcome 
I am in a very similar boat and want to take control of my life. Alcohol has set me back in so many stages of my life, and has only hurt the people that love me. I also have epilepsy so that being known just shows how little control I have over this addiction. It’s like I know I risk killing myself but still drink everyday. Multiple times a day.
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I always heard people say take it day by day and I finally feel like I’ve hit that point - To take it day by day. The days may feel longer but I know I’d rather deal with a long day of me being alive and trying than to give in to what makes me hate myself.
I have to fall out of the habits and schedules I have created. Going to the bar every day after work for a few hours is not good as well as going back later at night after dinner. So I’m hoping this app can distract me as those times come and I can take it day by day.
I do the exact same thing. I am working from home right now so all I want to do is get out of my apartment after. It also doesn’t help I live above a bar and my friend also bartends there. Thankfully my lease is up soon so I can find a place without a bar connected haha
I just feel like the only thing that makes me happy is going out and socializing which leads to too many drinks. I wish I could stop myself after a couple but one turns into two, turns into me closing down the bar.
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Welcome Kasey!
It’s hard when we open our eyes and see our substance use is just a hollow… blah. What is it? For me I realized my addiction was just a huge waste of time and energy.
Then we start to ask, “What else could I do with this energy and time?”
We start by learning a bit from others with similar questions. (Hang out here on Talking Sober - lots of good stuff to read here!) In addition to TS, there’s loads of good podcasts and books:
Resources for our recovery
Then when we start to feel a little more like taking charge, maybe step a little further into our lives, we might say, “No, I don’t want this taking my life and energy any more” and then we decide we need a community - we need people to help us find our way, sober.
When we do that, we need a community. For some people, that’s here on TS. For some, it’s at groups (there are many sobriety groups; see some online ones here: Online meeting resources - in-person ones are listed here: Resources for our recovery) - it’s about finding people who understand and support your journey to get clear and clean, and to grow in a new direction.
Welcome Kasey! Keep reading, keep listening, keep sharing, keep learning. You’re doing a good thing 
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Same. I work construction in Manhattan so it comes with the life style and I get out at 2 and drink at-least till 5. Just to start back up at 730 at night after dinner and a shower. I really have created a abusive schedule.
I had this idea in my head that instead of going to the bar, to send myself to the movies or something to distract me. I haven’t made it to in person meetings yet but I feel I’m getting closer to being brave enough to go. I just know I’ll break down crying
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The path you just described is exactly how I’ve been feeling. It’s nice to know that someone and many others understand the feelings of navigating this sobriety especially at the beginning of my journey. Thank you for all of the things you mentioned here. It does help reduce my anxiety
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Glad to hear it Kasey. Substance use is basically about isolating ourselves. We develop a relationship with a substance that replaces our relationships with people. And that leaves us hollow.
Keep reaching out and keep connecting. Do what you need to do to stay present and clean. The voice of the substance will whisper in your ear; it’s lying to you. Keep reaching out and sharing - you will find it helps you rediscover yourself, and it fills in everything you’ve lost.
You’re a good person and you deserve a safe, sober life where you can be your full self.
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I have a rule I like to use that helps me: you’re allowed to do anything that’s safe and legal, to keep yourself sober.
You can watch Netflix for 12 hours. No problem!
You can eat pizza for 3 days.
You can cancel plans.
You can change plans.
You can spend hours on Talking Sober.
You can take 3-hour walks listening to angry music.
Any activity you want, as long as it’s legal and safe and sober.
That’s true freedom right?
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I can definitely get on board with this. Especially the pizza idea 
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Checking in daily helps so much. Everyone has a story and a struggle. No judgements… we are all here for personal growth, sobriety, and becoming the best version of ourselves. One day at a time…
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The good thing is that it seems like you are drinking after work only, not during the day during work. My addiction progressed so that I was pretty much drinking from when I woke up til bedtime. Didn’t start out that way. There are many sobriety based online and in-person meetings after work during the witching hours. People cry in these meetings all the time. Finding other sober people to connect to is the single best tool I have that has kept me sober for 10.5 months. I have local sober friends that I see IRL and online friends from all over the world. Connection is key. Addiction is isolation, as Matt said. Welcome to TS!
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Try a meeting might help wish you well