I’m at 45 days. I feel so incredibly positive. This is after a lifetime of depression and sadness. My depression isn’t from alcohol but it was certainly exacerbated by it. Some things have really helped and I wanted share them in case they could help others.
I decided to quit drinking. Obviously the decision was the most important thing. I never said how long I’d quit I just knew it was causing issue. At 45 days it’s still a struggle and I still find myself trying to make excuses but I try to keep remembering how happy I am right now.
I’m surrounding myself with people who support me. I am reaching out to my select few friends I know will not judge me but support me in every way. Find a few good people. I’m not cutting out the others forever but I’m creating a distance that’s comfortable for me.
I started taking vitamins. I’ve always struggled with PMDD once a month and it causes such a depression it sometimes can take weeks to get out of, or I can’t. I’ve spent hours laid up in bed with sadness and so much money on alcohol to try and fall asleep and hide it. I started taking some vitamins that I think are helping. I’m sure everyone benefits from things differently but I’d say if your struggling from something it might help to read up on what might help you personally. For PMDD I’m talking Vitex Fruit (I think that’s the name) as well as multi vitamin, calcium(because I can’t drink milk), turmeric, vitamin e(healthy skin), biotin(strong happy/nails), and magnesium(healthy mind). The other thing that’s extremely helpful when I cannot sleep is called phenebuit and it literally makes me have the best sleep of my life. I wake up happy and rested. I don’t take it daily, only as needed but it’s been amazing for me. Everyone doesn’t have the same reaction as my boyfriend has tried it and doesn’t feel anything at all from it where I will fall asleep almost working half hour without fail.
I’m going to therapy and have found someone I absolutely trust and enjoy talking to. I started before sobriety. He explains mental health to me in a scientific way and that really resonates with me. It is honestly party of why I decided to stop drinking, because my brain cannot hear if I’m using alcohol to numb memories. Working through therapy and sobriety in conjunction is fantastic.
I’m sure there’s more but for now these have really helped me. (There might me writing errors because I’m not going to reread and edit this)
Thanks! This is a really helpful list. Your story seems very similar to mine. Depression, drinking, etc. Exercise really does help me, gives me structure and a feeling of accomplishment.
I was running a lot for the last two years. I took a break after 2 marathons and 2 half’s. I went too hard. I try to focus on one thing at a time. I quit smoking 3 years ago and told myself not to worry about weight, after 6 months of smoke free success I started a biggest loser contest at work. I started jogging, I could only go .25 miles at a time then walk. I remember how proud I was at two miles. I ate healthy for three months and won $300 at our office pool. I kept going, I started a low carb/ no sugar diet. I lost 75 lbs. I wanted to focus on keeping it off. It’s been two years. Now my focus is sobriety, one thing at a time, one day at a time and those small changes have made such a huge distance in the last three years of my life. Now I’m a healthy sober non smoker and I never thought any of those things was possible. I’m starting back to exercise tomorrow. I’m excited and ready. This time focus isn’t on weight but on muscle tone. One small thing at a time will inevitably lead me exactly where I’ve always wanted to be. I cannot even believe the person I am right now, I absolutely never ever ever thought this life was possible.
Wow! Thats amazing! And encouraging! Really like “i cant believe the person i am now…” For me, walking thru the door and participating is the biggest step. It truly helps, really does build up a foundation that I can keep building on. For me, structured action is where its at. Keep up the good work and happy to hear you are enjoying your journey.
I’m not cutting out the others forever but I’m creating a distance that’s comfortable for me.
This is so important. As someone who used alcohol and pills to try and exert perfect control over my reactions to things, I came to see the world and other people through a black and white lens. I thought I would have to cut so many people out because I didn’t know how to establish healthy boundaries. But it doesn’t have to be that way!
Indeed! I should add 1 more class a week. The routine helps me along w the accountability. It gives me self esteem, pride and energy and a sense of belonging. Plus I like kicking and punching and sweating to get some of the excess energy out.
That’s awesome. I enjoy walking/jogging and I also teach several ballet classes during the week (I’ve danced my whole life). Struggling a bit again this afternoon, used to watching football this time of year with a beverage in hand. Going to go for another walk here in a few minutes.
Classes are a huge help to me. Im sure your students look up to you. Staying active is a big help. I hear you on the beverage in hand. Its so habitual to have one. Ive been figeting w my AA chip in my pocket when I start getting squirrely. Enjoy your walk and be proud of where you are at and the decisions you are making. Reach out here if you are struggling. Im on Day 10 btw.
If I’m somewhere or doing something id normally be drinking doing I try to bring beverages to hold or even a water jug to refill so I can drink something. They sell glass 6 packs of root beer, Ginger ale, Coke, Ginger beer, etc they are expensive but not as much as alcoholism. Good luck!!! Keep up the awesome work!!!
Thanks! Tomorrow at 9:00 am will be the beginning of day 4 which is actually pretty big for me. Hoping and praying to just keep pushing through knowing that it will not always be this hard.
Many of the alcoholics I’d be around are family so I certainly don’t want to cut them out. I think setting boundaries is an extremely important thing to learn how to be comfortable doing. Those who truly love you will understand. I also haven’t really told many people that I’m actively trying not to drink so in reality the issue hasn’t come up much, I just say no thanks if offered a drink and have tried not to put myself in a situation where I’d be around the peer pressure alcoholic’s, although it’s happened several times and I’ve just said no thanks and left it at that.
Day 4 tomorrow!! Thats awesome…for me, I know having structured support is important. Its also important for me to be kind and forgiving to myself. Do you have a support plan?
Being on here has helped. Staying busy has helped. My mom and boyfriend are very supportive as well. But yes, I just don’t want to fail again. Have to keep strong and allow myself to be scared, angry, and upset at times I know. When did things begin to get better for you?
Awesome! You know what and who will help you, thats big. For me, when I was truly honest w myself, the clouds began to part. I told people how I was feeling, which was horrible/lost/confused/depressed/anxious. I have finally accepted that alcohol contributes to those empty feelings and that my life can improve if I avoid drinking. I want to feel better bc I know i have so much more to offer. Ive also done a lot of thinking but for me, its action that truly helps. Classes, communicating honestly, counseling, exercise, groups, AA. Just taking my disease seriously and trying to truly heal and treat the roots. I can drink a beer and be fine but eventually I will be passed out on the bathroom floor, etc. My future is very dark if I drink and bright if I dont. I want to live and honor who I really am.
