Hello! My name is Kattie. I am a mother of 4, and I am 32 years old. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about 7 years now and I was addicted to alcohol all of those years. In total, I’d say I’d been drinking from about 2015-2023. Almost 10 years. Over time, it progressed. When I was pregnant of course I’d quit but I’d eventually just get right back to it. My behavior when I was drinking was disruptive, and catastrophic. It was mean, and angry. I turned into a person I just didn’t recognize. I’d become suicidal, doing things like jumping off a moving golf cart and I’ve even slit my wrist. I would become aggressive. Attacking anyone that would upset me. Especially my boyfriend. This addiction has even put me in jail. There was a time or 2 that I quit. Without being pregnant, just on my own. But eventually I’d make the excuse oh just on Fridays. Then on the weekends. Well Monday was okay too, and then it just turned into everyday. Everyday. Black out drunk. Waking up still drunk and just doing it all over again. In the beginning of this year I’d quit. For awhile actually. And then once again I fell right back into the same bed habits. Something happened, that was a HUGE wakeup call and I decided to once again quit. I’m still really early on in my recovery, but I’ve surrounded myself with new people from the church I’ve began attending. I also attend celebrate recovery. This last mess up was pretty big and I know I have so many haters waiting and watching. Hoping I’ll fail. I refuse. I can’t. My kids deserve so much more. I deserve so much more. On the upside I have been on a weightloss journey. I was 299 and now 160. That’s really kept my mind of drinking. Healthy habits, eating good, and working out.
Thank you all for listening 
I’m excited to have found this app.
This is a great place! Congratulations on reaching the point of wanting change. I’ve personally found that working on improving my physical fitness and maintaining my weight is a key to my overall mental wellbeing and critical to my sobriety. Hang in there, you’ve got this.
Welcome here Kattie, glad you found us 
Good to hear you managed to change your life for the better. It’s not easy I know.
I’m a mother of 3 and drank between every pregnacy as well. Quit for a few years now with the help of this app.
I hope it helps you as much.
Take your time to feel comfy here, it’s a good place!
See you around 
Wow Kattie your story resonates ALOT with me, i too was a different person when drunk…the total opposite to who i really am…sober me literally wont hurt a fly, drunk me was hurtful, nasty, even violent at times…
Big warm welcome from me, this is a non judgemental safe place for us all to talk to fellow addicts, we all understand here, heres my full story i wrote when i hit my 1 year sober, hope it helps you…
Hiya Kattie,
Welcome 
Your story sounds like you’ve been through the wringer many times. Alcohol is a bitch isn’t it? You say that lots of people are expecting you to fuck up and fail - I’ve got the exact same monkeys on my back at the moment. Something I’ve done recently is cut out everyone who holds these expectations of me - I just don’t need the pressure from people who don’t know me well enough to even have my phone number.
Sounds like you have plenty more drinks in you.
How many recovery’s do you have left? Is this it? I know for a fact that if I drink again, it’ll be 6 litres of Jack and I won’t stop til it kills me. This is my last recovery. Is it yours?
Amazing starlight
Welcome Kattie
I’m so glad you found us.
This sober app, community, forum, whatever, has been instrumental in my recovery. Being active on here has kept me sober.
We don’t have to live like that anymore.
Have a good read around join in when you’re comfortable. Ask questions and keep an open mind. We were all new once and we’re all happy to help.
Welcome, Katie and thanks for sharing your story. Glad you are here!
Welcome!! I was similar, I just kept getting worse and more blackouts and stupid shit. It can take time to change old habits, patterns, beliefs, but you are totally worth it. I know a few people whose weight loss made the drinking and blackouts way worse. It is a sad side effect unfortunately for some. Glad you are here.
I hope it is my last recovery.
Make it your last recovery and it will be, you might not have another left
Welcome Katie 
Thank you for sharing your story.
Can you just write whatever you want on here like a journal or ? What do you write ?
I check in sober in the check in treat. I do not know how put the link here so I will tag you in it so you can check it out. There is also a journal function here, but I do not use that one myself.
Thanks for sharing n welcom to talking sober where you will find some friends and can come here and lay your mess on the table without judgment. Continue on your journey ODAAT.