My heart sinks when i relapse. Even if it was just for 1 day. The guilt is overwealming. Does anyone have any tips?
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Analyse what happened. What made you relapse? What made you crave before relapsing? What triggered you? What can you do different so not to relapse next time you face the same triggers? Etcetera. Learn something from this episode. That way it won’t be all for nought. One tip: next time come here before you use. We might talk you out of it, or beter said, you might get out of the idea of using by being here. Success.
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Use the guilt etc to realise that it is much easier to just push your way through a craving and not use in the first place. Dealing with the craving is easier than dealing with relapse guilt.
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One of our long time forum members did a series of topics on relapsing. I’ll link one of them below and you can find the others by clicking on his profile. Each one is worth reading.
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Why do you relapse? Something isnt working?
For me, getting sober went fart past “just not drinking”. I had to figure out the whys.
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What feelings are you drinking/using at to deal with/ignore/repress/increase/decrease etc ?
You gotta engage with yourself. Relapse does not just happen out of the blue. Connect the dots.
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All relapses, slips, trips & whatever we want to call them are fortunately in the past. When we do not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it, we begin to heal and can move forward.
Beating yourself up on your past isn’t helping shit, instead maybe use it as a way to help others like us.
Getting out of my own head was key to becoming happy and free of the mental obsession.
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Cocaine stays in the urine for up to two weeks. You haven’t even had a chance to fully metabolize the drug, dependent on your quantity of use. There is a reason so many people falter in the first few days, you can feel the drug/alcohol leaving the body and your body will scream for a dopamine hit.
In my brain, I don’t consider it a relapse until after that two weeks. Before that, every day without drugs and alcohol counts but it’s still your system. When I fall before that, I don’t even consider myself “sober.” To each their own.
It happened. You can no longer change it. Get up. Dust off. Recommit. Add something that’s going to address that dopamine issue. This was posted before, try to substitute some of these things for your DOC. And ditch the dealer’s number, block, forget, avoid.
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Guilt is like the pain we get when we cut ourselves. It is meant to signal that something is wrong and needs attending to in order to heal what is causing the pain. We’re not meant to hold on to that feeling, just as we’re not meant to hold onto the pain of a cut. Use the guilt to look at what happened from all sides. What went wrong? What led up to the relapse? What emotions, people, places, events, etc., influenced you? How can you make changes to avoid those in the future?
Examine, inquire, plan, then let go. You already stumbled. That won’t change, but you can change the future. I know that this is easier said than done, but finding a way to make this work for you over time will likely be very helpful as your emotional state and your thoughts inform your future actions.
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Other than what has already been said, I just wanted to add; don’t stop trying 
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Have you decided if sobriety is what you want for yourself?
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