Hi Sonya, I’m glad to hear you’re doing ok so far. I need my redhead clan to be ok 
Seriously though, good for you seeking recovery. You’re a good person who got lost in an addiction. So many of us have been there before. You’re still a good person, and you belong, and you matter, and you deserve a safe, sober life, where you can be your full self.
Stick around, keep reading and learning. There are so many wise souls here, and many have been down the same path you’ve been on. This thread is one of my faves to share with people in early sobriety because it’s got so many good resources, including recovery programs, and memoirs about recovery:
Resources for our recovery
Never, ever stop trying. Never, ever give up. It takes effort and persistence and a godammit-I will-not-give-in-or-give-up mentality, but I promise you it is worth it. Take care Sonya and never stop believing in yourself! 