@Rado I can definitely see your p.o.v. and you definitely aren’t the problem. It’s the people (men and maybe women) who are trying to take advantage of people who are in a vulnerable position. Personally, I know I’m super good looking so I didn’t use a photo of myself bc it would be distracting lol.
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Reminds me of that old country song
"Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble
When you’re perfect in every way
I can’t wait to look in the mirror
Cause I get better looking each day
To know me is to love me
I must be a hell of a man
Oh Lord It’s hard to be humble,
But I’m doing the best that I can"
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Well said @Rosey and well done for speaking out about it.
I have 3 older sisters and a bit like @Yoda-Stevie said I always think how they would feel if someone was inappropriate towards them in the way I have seen some comments written here.
This should be a safe space.
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@Yoda-Stevie I was hoping my sarcasm was evident in the utter ridiculousness of my statement, but ya never know haha. I like to use humor as a tool in my recovery, but I will admit that humility is something I continue to work on. I’m definitely not perfect there, but I’m trying. I was a much bigger of an a-hole when I was using.
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I caught the humor, and thought I’d join in. That song used to crack me up.
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I’ve had a few personal messages that have made me a little uncomfortable. I messaged @Steve92 about it not to flag the person or do anything but just to have a record in case others were experiencing the same thing. It can’t hurt to let Steve know about your messages too…just in case it is the same person. It is through holding it in and thinking that it’s no big deal that it can blow up to be a HUGE deal.
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Thanks, Rosey for bringing this to light and helping to keep this place what it is intended to be- a place for us to share and feel safe in our recovery. I have seen some posts from @Steve92 addressing some jerks and I really appreciate it. So many forums on the web are just seedy, and Sober Time is not; thanks to everyone who just won’t stand for it. When I started using this forum I invited hubby to check it out, just so he could see what type of peeps were on here and that it WAS NOT some kind of hook up spot. I never have to worry if I leave my app open and him or the kids read the threads, and so happy to see that everybody is on the same page.
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A very, very wise thing to do. I have told my wife that she’s welcome to read my posts and PM’s anytime. I refer to everyone here as my “sober friends”, as in when I am laughing, she’ll ask, “what’s funny?” and I’ll say “one of my sober friends wrote x…” or when I am bummed, it’s “one of my sober friends is having a really hard time, life is trying to take their lunch money”
I also reassure her to let her know that I am glad she said “yes” to me when she did, because the ““VIP LIne” for Club Stevie only had one lady standing in it…You!”
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I agree. While it is encouraged to reach out and connect to people (duh - it’s a forum), it’s definitely not okay to bother people who don’t want to be bothered. If you get messages like these, just tell them off politely. If they carry on - flag it and we’ll take care of it.
I think the nature of this forum will sometimes cause people to be too nice, which is then taken advantage of. Most of these cases are when a person messages another by asking about sobriety and so forth. The receiver will nice and supportive, that’s why they’re here, but the sender will basically turn it into a pickup session.
It’s a pretty uncomfortable situation for the moderator and the receiver, and I can only imagine it to be embarrassing for the sender.
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Everyone thinks Our own Little Dicky is smoking hawt
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Squirtle is cool, not hot. Change your profile pic to Charmander 
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Yeah guys quit hitting on me…I know I’m a successful feline, but it’s inappropriate…
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I wish I was hot - it’s minus 9 outside and 15 on my couch - luckily I have 2 trusty hot water bottles (1 up my jumper) and 4 pairs of socks on (2 chunky knit).
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Im sure this will continue. I dont know if it had been made clear in the guidelines for newbies. But it should be made CLEAR there this isnt sober tinder… It always seems to be new comers. Guys keep thinkin with the wrong widdle head and are simple… smh …lol
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Yeah I have to back you on this one too. For me like I’m assuming many others this is a fight for my life and in early sobriety this is taking all my energy and all my focus the last thing I need to be worrying about is another relationship especially with the outcome being predictable if I don’t change
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Very well said and very important to state
We are all addicts in one form or another.
Anger is my addiction
I do not want to cause anyone to stumble in their addiction. Neither do I want them in my addiction.
13 years sober from alcohol. I don’t want any new addictions, thank you very much.
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I’m not new to this app but I am to the chat rooms. I joined this app because I don’t have a lot of support for my sobriety outside of here. I’m glad I have all of you to turn to if I’m feeling down. It’s upsetting that tete are people out there being inappropriate. I’d say remove term from the page but then we are pushing away someone in need of help. Let’s just all be adults people
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I agree. Relationships can be addictions too!!
I don’t. Can you explain it?