Thank you @anon84416494 for your sharing. I can totally relate to it. I’ve been sober for 11 days only, and have a lot of questions, fear in my head, but your words lifted me, strengthened me, gave me hope.
All the Best, 
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We share experience, strength and hope, not opinion. And all we have to offer is a program of recovery, certainly not cures for modern ills.
There’s probably something available from GSO on this, I believe there is a “safety card”. https://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/f-211_SafetyCardforAAGroups.pdf
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Jeez. 
I think I need to look at this …it’s difficult to teach my children about asking for things …it’s a difficult one… Me, expecting others to contribute (in the house)…it’s pretty massive thing this week for me and I been taking it out on myself but I can’t figure out what I’m supposed to do, be like,or be a nag (no)…or just tolerate that I’m getting asked to do things for my kids and I’m just doing them for peace 
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There was a point during my use, not sure when, where I told myself I was going to moderate my heroin use. My plan was use just enough to stay off sick and if I could do that then I could live a normal productive life. That was the plan at least, but I doubt I ever even made it one day like that.
I was so desperate to keep using that I honestly thought that a little bit of heroin would be okay. I mean if I’m not getting high am I even an addict? Kinda just like, if I don’t get drunk it’s not a relapse, or I only smoke pot everyday after work, it can’t be bad right?
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Day 5
If i dont pick up, its a good day. I made it back to my home group in AA and picked up a 1 day coin, no shame but i felt shame for myself. I should be further along
I got a sponcer
I call him every night
I would like to sit down with him as soon as possible which i hope is Tuesday or be4 but it looks like the next time i get to see him is Tuesday
I would like to write down why and how my alcoholic mind works and expariances that led me back to sobriery even after constant relapses.
In AA i got some tough love.
Just dont pick up sums it all up
Dont pick up
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I had that same plan with pills. It never worked. I too thought if I could just take enough to avoid getting sick, I’d be a “normal” person and just go on living life. I made numerous attempts but failed every time within the first few hours of waking up.
Now I’m looking back and saying wtf was I thinking?! My true addict mind honestly thought it was possible. My clean sober mind realizes that was the dumbest plan.
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I found that keeping a daily journal for the first year or so of my sobriety really helped clarify things for me. You can search the web for “aa step study questions” to find some prompts you can use to get started.
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Heyy I started the worksheet : )))
Thank you for letting me know I could find the work online
Step one is a rough one
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Avoiding drinking situations, “distracting” yourself, being a better person, these are not plans for sobriety. They are denial mechanisms and I hope they don’t kill you or someone else.
Building sobriety by working on sobriety is what works. End of story.
Now I’ll wait at least 30 minutes, then write a reply to a guy who has gotta stop drinking because the consequences are embarrassing.
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Hobbies are fun things I get to have as a result of my sobriety. Sobriety is not something I’ve gained as a result of my hobbies. My first 5-6 months were intensely focused on sobriety. Meetings, IOP, one one counseling. Once I started working I made sure to always have a meeting right after work. That hard work, and continued practice of my program of choice, have given me a greater degree of freedom than I ever thought possible
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Wouldn’t it be a fucking novelty if we asked for help before we relapsed instead of after. Strangely enough I don’t need you to tell me how you feel, I know exactly how you feel, you need to hear how I feel and what I do to stay that way.
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I never asked for help before my relapse because I didn’t want anyone to talk me out of it.
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too true mate, plus sometimes it happens so quick I didn’t know until it was too late but you get the point.
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I need to do that. Reach out before consuming. There’s just too much of a spiraling gateway. I start with harmless, which progresses to questionable, to risky, to just all out not giving an F.
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Have things felt better at home for you @Hazy? I get caught in that place as well within my position in my family. I try to not let it get to my head in either direction, like I try to not feel woe is me and also try not to be on a high horse either. Tough tight rope to walk as a parent sometimes.
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Hi… yes things are all good thanks, life moves on very quickly when I’m clean!, Can’t even remember that person or situation that wrote that post!, Thanks for checking in…over 5months now, have had a sponsor for all those months and keep in contact a couple of times a week, reading step 3 out later, haven’t done many meetings for last 2 months but felt like hopping on one this morning. 
. Hope you have a lovely day 
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It’s like expecting a broken bone can set itself.
If something is wrong with how I think about something, how can I expect the answers exist in my own thinking.
I didn’t get this for a very long time. But once I did, I found sobriety for the first time.
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Listen. Read. Learn. No need to talk much. No need to ask much. Be open. Give up. Accept. Be patient. I had to learn I don’t own the truth. Still learning and the more I learn the less I know. I do know alone I’m lost.
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my Mrs, 30 years smoking weed and tobacco and just stopped, she couldn’t even tell me how long she’s been quit for. I’m not trying to be clever it just emphasises the fact that she really is special 
to me anyway. If I lived with me I would need a spliff tbf. 
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This is a repeat of a few other of my posts, but it’s worth repeating.
Alcohol is not the problem. My relationship with alcohol (and drugs) is the problem. Alcohol has not caused anything in my life that I have not invited it in to do. A bottle of beer has never once jumped down my throat. I knowingly put it there, and therefore, I knowingly accepted the consequences, whatever they may be.
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