Try to fill an empty hole

I sympathise. The “emptiness” seems to be always there. I also fill it with distractions.


I relate. I know that hole.

Today, my hole is caused by wanting to fix/change things that I have no direct control over. My struggles to accept that I cannot change or fix it makes my hole feel bigger. I can direct my thinking to magnify it, or find reasons to allow me to live with it the best I can.

When I magnify it, the problems multiply and become bigger. The hole can easily become so large that it feels like to only way to escape is to jump into it. I used to fill the hole with drugs and booze. In hindsight, I wasn’t filling the hole, I became a part of it. It feels comfortable for a while because I spent so much time in there, eventually it feels worse than before I jumped in and I have to desperately claw my way out again. Its never easy to get back out.

I’ve noticed a pattern in my recovery. I get frustrated with things I cannot control, things like the economy, the weather, politics, family, friends, co-workers. I make healthy adjustments and different problems happen. Unexpected problems. My level of acceptance gets smaller and my hole gets bigger.

My inner alcoholic loves this. It lives inside the hole and it misses me. It starts feeding me lies to trick me into joining it. Its smarter than me.

I have to stay focused. The path of recovery can get pretty narrow at times.


I’m just giving my answer like everyone else, not trying to debate or push it but the best thing I can tell you about that emptiness is that we are made to have God in our lives via the salvation Jesus bought us on the cross. The work is done and the only thing needed now is an application of faith. Jesus said before His last breath “it is finished.” Isaiah 55:He was bruised for our iniquities, the chastisement of our peace was upon Him, with his stripes we are healeded" It is finished. We don’t get the answers to everything but seeking God wholeheartedly will provide what we need. The Bible says that when a spirit leaves a person it roams around looking for a home and finding none returns to the previous inhabitant. Thus we need to be filled with the Holy Spirit which Jesus imparted to us. Many verses tell us the Holy Spirit give us power to overcome and to live a Holy Life. It doesn’t mean God demands perfect, He just requires our whole heart. Some of us suffer with these kind of feelings because of mental health and that’s something Jesus also wants to help us bear, we are not alone. Of there is a deep calling there is a deep to respond.


Sometimes people have a hard time ‘reading the room’. I don’t know if this US phrase translates well. What I mean is that while it is helpful to share your experience, it is also helpful to read a thread and understand the belief system of the original poster …and respect their belief system.

“You’re an interesting species. An interesting mix. You’re capable of such beautiful dreams, and such horrible nightmares. You feel so lost, so cut off, so alone, only you’re not. See, in all our searching, the only thing we’ve found that makes the emptiness bearable, is each other.”

~ Carl Sagan, Contact

Here we are…all together…trying to fill our emptiness with our shared experience. Some will fit more than others. :people_hugging: