What can you do when you feel helpless and sad over current events; standing with Uvalde

When bad things happen to good people, there is a natural tendency to feel overwhelmed, sad and helpless… …

If you are feeling “helpless” and want to do “something”, giving a blood donation will always be beneficial in your community.

Until they say, ‘we have too much, please stop coming’, they are in need.
Google “where do I give blood” to find out where to go or look through the Red Cross website.

Doing for others can help you feel like you are doing something, when otherwise you feel like you want to do something, but you do not know how or what.

Most important, keep your sobriety safe and know that is a gift you have given yourself which is precious and something for you to always protect. Giving it up in the face of adversity gives the bad stuff more power so please don’t do that.

Take care all. We get through. Together.
Standing with Uvalde


All I can say is that we’ve been here before. We’re here CONSTANTLY. At a gas station last night, someone asked me “if I had heard about the shooting”. I hadn’t yet, and my response was “which one?”

That alone speaks volumes.

Perhaps the most frustrating thing is that jack shit will change. I won’t pretend I know the answer. It’s a complex issue requiring not only action from legislators who’d rather sit on their hands and protect their own interests, but we also require a massive cultural shift in this country.

There will be thoughts and prayers, a bit of bickering between parties, and then nothing - and we’ll do it all again next week. Power and money is more important than American lives, the lives of American children.

And it fucking disgusts me.

If this is too political or toeing the line too much, I don’t care. Flag it.


There will be more bullshit “thoughts and prayers” You’re right about needing a culture shift though… we seem to be fundamentally broken somehow, too much hate and division, not enough unity and love.


Apathy is part of the problem. Thank you for contributing such a shining example.


Someone DID this. It’s not a natural desaster or act of God. It’s got a socio-cultural context, many levels of it. It’s part of the same world we are also part of and that shapes us, so it’s related to us. The person who commited this crime is equally part of this world.
Action is called for. If it’s not happening, this is also a fact of this world. Doesn’t make it the right or natural attitude.


Not just gun-related violence, but the amount of violence and aggression here in general is a symptom of much larger issues.


My husband and I were pretty shocked about this yesterday. He took a walk with our 10 year old when he got home and just listened to all her stories and let her talk about whatever she wanted.
The realization that those things can be gone by the hand of someone who themselves either couldn’t get the help they needed or was just malice filled and so took wrath out on INNOCENT LIVES is very real, very close at heart lately.

Hell, even in our small town here in Alaska there was a very real fucking bomb threat just over two months ago at my daughter’s elementary school. IN RURAL ALASKA. Thankfully she was out with me that day but what about her friends? Their families? The teachers?

The 18 year old shooter who did this yesterday literally just bought a gun over the counter and I think that’s wild and I think America needs to stop its circle jerk obsession with weaponry ownership and and we need to have our fire power taken away significantly.
I am not going to argue with any Q anon koolaid drinkers who go on about “waah weakened as a country because of that”.

American public is so goddamned polarized over GUNS. we all know the ‘after a school shooting’ song and dance by heart now. We’re so far from redemptive action. Politicians burn us down. People dying in the streets bc of that. We’re an angry child with a gun as a country and it needs to full stop.

Also. Maybe the NRA fueled goons could stop strategically turning the argument immediately to the shooter’s mental health instead of looking at the ease of access every layperson has to weaponry.
The only time that group of people cares about mental health is when it’s threatening to take their gun rights away.

Flag if you want i don’t apologize


@mamador I’m distraught and somehow made it through yesterday’s news without resorting to alcohol by some miracle. I’m a mom of a 10-year-old daughter too. Standing with you in rage and horror, and agree with all.


I’m still trying to process 2008 which was a huge contributing factor to me justifying my relapse in 2011.

It’s easy to focus on all the horrible things that happen in this crazy world. It’s easy to get a huge case of the fuck Its and think I might as well get loaded and stay loaded.

It’s one thing after another.

I’ve been struggling with anxiety over global and local events for a few months. It was getting worse.

It made me isolate. The more I isolated the less I wanted to interact with anyone.

I forced myself to get out and get active in AA which has lead to opportunities to be of service to others.

It’s been a game changer for my anxiety.

I wasn’t feeling like drinking, but I was feeling overwhelmed with fear.

I’ve been working on recovery harder than I had been. The results are good.

I’m powerless over global issues. I’m mostly powerless over local issues. I can donate blood and be of service in that way. Great idea @Alisa

I do what I can to be of service to others. That’s not limited to being of service in AA. It is extremely helpful for me.

It’s hard to detach from all the insanity. I care about humanity. I care about the earth. It’s hard not to to care so much that I lose myself in the process.

I’m grateful that my recovery tools work for anything.


This was a horrible event with some still processing and close to it. The feelings of helplessness can be real.

That said, a reminder per our Guidelines that this is not a forum for debating matters of policy.

Let’s all do our best to offer our support and stay focused on unity and recovery.


For my part I know that sober, I can bring peace. I can stay in a place of light despite darkness. A reminder to be guided by a spirit of love and alleviate suffering.


I wrote a little bit on the check in thread, but when it comes to dealing with helpless feelings (which I was absolutely mired in yesterday) here are my thoughts:

(I’m) overwhelmed and having a hard time not picturing what people must be going through right now. My mind turns to the pain people must be feeling all around the world in different situations, war time, death, loss, pain, pain, pain. I’ve turned off the news today and just have to practice some grounding. Find my gratitude. Touch some earth. Let the rain that’s falling today land on my face. Cuddle with my dog and my husband. Text my loved ones. Lean into the ways I’m contributing to my community and see how else I can have an impact. Most of all, for me to have any positive impact I will not drink to numb. I will continue to see the importance of feeling the full range of emotions and will use the ways I know to cope with the challenging ones so that I can appreciate joy and love and contentment in their turn.


Me, too Jason. I have been so despondent and really digging the ditch of “my life has no purpose.” I did drink through a lot of it.

The one thing I can say is that I know drinking through it or at it doesn’t make it better but it does make me more despondent. I am glad you directed your energy toward something productive for your sobriety and for your community.

I am climbing out of that fog because I do have power. I have a voice and a vote and two beautiful kids that are here with me today. Wasting that is not ok. My life is a gift and I don’t want to take it for granted.


It is a gift! You are worth it.

I sometimes struggle with feeling worth it. Helping others helps that too.


The world is such a dark place right now. In general, it seems (talking about the public I serve) people have given up caring. I struggle to get out of bed. The tragedy that happened felt like a ton of bricks on my sould, and another reason to hide under the covers.

What has kept me going? 1) faith that one day, something will happen and will bring us back together. 2) small acts of kindness…I am just 1 man, I have no illusion that I can have any pact on the history we are living in. However, I have taken on a challenge to myself to help 3 random people I do not know. I bought a meal for a mother who hadnt eaten, gas for a guy who only had 2 bucks, ect, ect ect. I say this not for a pat on the back…simply as a suggestion as a way to find some good in this world.


Always I am reminded we can make a difference in our own little corner of the world. Smile at someone. Pick up trash on your walk. Leave some food at the local food pantry. Volunteer for an hour walking a shelter dog or cleaning cat boxes. Come here and offer a listening ear. Kindness is always needed.


from “The Pocket Pema Chodron” by Pema Chödrön -

“OUR personal attempts to live humanely in this world are never wasted. Choosing to cultivate love rather than anger just might be what it takes to save the planet from extinction.”


@SassyRocks @Thirdmonkey Such important viewpoints. As I transition from mostly sad to more and more angry this really helps to be reminded of. Thank you.


I personally don’t understand why you responded to his/her response this way. What he/she said is the truth. and just because some people try to excuse their own apathy by pointing out apathy where it’s not, is quite frankly sad.

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I’m guessing you read this post, the one directly following. It tells you what you need to know. And ignoring the fact that we could be intervening and saying it’s just another atrocity we have no power over is part of the problem.