It’s been since February and no, I don’t want to get back together with him at all. This is purely an AA “making amends” thing and it seems almost everyone agrees I don’t need to do this with him, but I am an obsessive thinker and I think I am mostly angry at myself for not letting go of the shame that I have for not seeing him for what he was at the time. I feel like a fool.
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Maybe write a letter out to him but just keep it or burn it. I think if you get it out it may help.
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Ah! Great idea! Thank you.
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Your not a fool ,your trying and I respect you for wanting to make amends but in this case it’s really not needed .I get the obsessive thinking I have to be careful not to fall into that trap and from experience the more clean time the less obsessive thinking we have,all the best💙
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Thank you, best to you too!
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Ive been sponsoring for a few years now and i care about the guys i sponsor , and yea maybe write a letter send it might help
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Most people don’t care I find, especially here in L.A. People are phonies and too wrapped up in their own lives here.
Nah, I like Donna’s idea of writing a letter and burning it, never sending it. I don’t want to ever see or speak to the jerk again. Wouldn’t want him to get the wrong idea.
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I’ve met some really cool young AA people from socal at a YPAA conference. They are very active in the program and very tight. Maybe look for some Young people meetings. You might have better luck there
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Haha, no. I’m old, not young. I’m also a conservative. But thanks for thinking I might fit in with young liberal people.
That guys is a jerk you do not need him and he does not deserve you. I understand your situation; all my ex’s did drugs and drank and brought me down with them. Made me feel like I was the problem/issue. Really just sucked the life out of me and over the years my addiction grew worse. I realized that even though I had a significant other I still felt lonely and disconnected to the ones I truly love (friends, family, ect). I fell into this love indoesed coma that became all about drugs. because I felt lonely I would use more. You have the ability to keep going and you will. There is a fight in us addicts that is very unique once we figure out things out. Good things do take time; sometimes a lot of time. It is not over with your love life. You will not be alone forever. » and you will find someone that truly cares for you and wants the best for you. I know, it’s a lonely time right now with Covid. I am also newly sober when the COVID hit and it seems there are less sober things to do. The world is kinda depressing overall and this pandemic doesn’t help. Look into your support system and don’t be afraid to ask for help. You can stay strong. We all can recover. 
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Thanks for posting for the first time here on my thread and thanks for your encouragement. I hope you’re right about things passing. I’m not an optimistic person, that’s another problem I have and alcohol made that worse.
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Keep us posted on your journey wish you well
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Political affiliation has no bearing in AA. I found that as a young person I actually felt more comfortable with the old timers in AA. Generally 30-40 years older than me. However, I made sure to look for similarities rather than differences. I get out of AA what I’m willing to put in to it. Early on I learned that having a positive mindset was everything.
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I appreciate your suggestion and insight. Best wishes to you.