i guess im making this post just to be seen by people who are going through the same thing.
anyways, i hit the one week mark of being sober off of alcohol and cocaine, but i threw both down the drain last night. it’s not much but i was really proud of myself. i had no reason to do so, i just wanted to. and now im feeling the onset of regret. i made it to a week and just threw it away, for literally nothing. i had a handle on it but i let it slip away just like that… i dont know. just sucks. disappointed in myself once again. trying to give myself grace but this was dumb.
truly hitting that reset button made my heart hurt…
here’s to another week hopefully i can get through.
Hi @withered sorry to hear about your relapse. It sucks being on the addiction treadmill. It sounds like you want to get off. That’s a good place to start
For me, accountability with people other than myself has been big. I am a member of a sobriety group and it has helped me a lot to be accountable to people who know the sober journey and who have been through the same challenges. There’s a list of groups (and good books and podcasts too) here: Resources for our recovery
Welcome to the community and I’m glad you took the time to reach out / post. That one week is impressive work and it is not lost. You can get back on the sober track and work on stacking up the days again. Don’t let the shame or regret eat at you. Br proud that you are back trying to get sober.
This is a wonderful space to interact with fellow members dealing with the same struggles.
Welcome, Alex. Don’t beat yourself up over your relapse, learn from it. Your sobriety means something to you.
This is a fantastic, friendly community, where you will find a lot of support. We are all in the same boat. Some of us are new to sobriety, while others have been sober for years. I encourage you to visit the site often, read around in the different threads, and check in daily (at least) in the beginning.
You can do this, but you don’t have to do it alone.
That was last night, that’s not today, and doesn’t have to be today, or tomorrow, and so on. Figure out your triggers, and try and avoid them. A week is a great accomplishment, and getting sober is different for everyone. Look at the relapse as a learning/teaching moment for yourself, grow from there. Sounds like you really do want this, but got sucked back in.
When I got sober off drugs, ( I’m still working on the. Alcohol at day 7 right now) I had to walk away from everyone, the whole drug scene. Cut out almost everyone that had anything to do with it, out of my life, and distanced myself from others for quite a while. That was 20 years ago this past November, haven’t touched heroin since. Have I had a couple slips over those 20 years, with other substances? Absolutely I have, but I chose the next day not to do it again and make it a habit.
It gets easier as more time passes. After 20 years I think the hardest thing, is when I run into people I used to party with, and nothing’s really changed for them, still using, in and out of jail and rehab, living on the streets,how they look weathered, drugged out, sometimes they don’t even know me, recognize me, cars still parked outside the same bar, at the same time, everyday… and I thank God for the night I decided enough was enough. You can do this.
