Fantastic, Hazy.
You are doing great. It’s grit and determination at first, then it becomes second nature as you reap all the benefits and trying not to self-sabotage, Well done. 
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Had a full on day today…I missed 2 weeks of live lectures (only one hour a week,I do rest online) and it was good to step inside lecture hall again and had loads of positive response to being back from lecturer and other students (half my age)!!..done a lot of studying,brains about to burst, excel is quite a mammoth thing to learn for maths assignment due in a week…
Very tired, ,old thoughts came in earlier this evening but I attacked with “I’m an alcoholic”…and to be honest I have too much to lose by carrying on being a functional alcoholic…I am carving a new direction career wise and that means new direction without alcohol too.
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Another good day full on studying, disciplined and determined to keep on track with the course, so comes discipline to stay sober, I’ve made sure I’ve eaten at intervals so I don’t get erratic and shaky, which also is an excuse for alcohol to full the hunger hole and be numb quicker,.
I don’t crave being numb today. My face is looking a bit more like me, less swollen… alcohol takes what looks you have away for sure. Gonna get a few more hours in tonight , and get some good rest. 
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Fifth day nearly done with no alcohol, went on a lovely walk,we go on one most weekends, no hangover,no thinking the whole time of how shite I look and thinking constantly about when I will get the next batch of cans,I only thought just now that I didn’t think about it all day…good feeling,freedom again!.. been studying for few hours this morning… studying a bit this evening,
Looking forward to a Thai takeaway with 2/3 of my offspring, and my niece…girls night in…
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It was at the end of the post , it’s a link to another thread I wrote about 2 weeks ago when I’ve hit the 60 days of sobriety and how I did manage to stay sober for those first two months. You can click on this to read it :
Have a good day!
And @Hazy it’s good to see you here.
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Thank you Wcan- sorry i didn’t catch that in your post. I read the one you linked. Lots of good info - thank you for sharing! Your story really resonates with me 
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Had another day of freedom today…it is actually freedom, when I had thoughts of buying alcohol I retorted with ‘im an alcoholic, i won’t stop once I start.’…pet guinea pig died this morning in my arms, poor little thing,… it was old. Children and I had a little tear but dealt with it really well…lots of revision done today, got a mock exam tomorrow… really grateful for today and the freedom from alcohol. Anxiety isn’t there anymore,I’ve been pretty chill for me! (Total stress head usually)… thankyou universe!
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Well done Hazy!
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6 days 19hours…busy day studying again…and had a bit of time out to visit garden centre to see all the Xmas lights in stock,. lovely!..got baby bio for my houseplants too…!.. dinner done…trip to get tobacco and didn’t pick up… really grateful to be sober and not in the cycle that I knew tonight,that it would be more tomorrow then the next and the next… grateful to be sober and clear headed, dyed my hair… looking less swollen every day,even tho dark circles around eyes…must try to get to bed earlier.
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8 full 24 hours since last alcohol… usual busy study study,wanted to cry at all the tasks to be done in computer workshop by next Friday…took a deep breath and just doing at my own pace,not gonna get stressed about that,got an essay to write and maths assignment to get done… grateful I am sober. Thankyou universe… 
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Well done! And good for you for taking a step back and grounding yourself.
Thanks @anon12657779,I really appreciate your motivational replies:hugs:…thankyou for mentioning my tag name back a couple of weeks ago,it must of been put out in the universe and brought me back to TS!
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8 days and 23 hours,laughed and joked a lot today with the children, been pretty positive since 7.30am … Played a game with the two younger ones after school…aiming to give them my full attention when they are at home…turning radio down when they speak in the car…turning it up when a silly old dance tune comes on (Venga bus is coming 
)…!!
. Glad today is over,had some uncomfortable feelings like anxiety and thought it like a test to deal with them…so went out and bought new pots for my plants,bleach for the loo, chocolate bars,for me and my eldest, …thanks Universe for supporting me on today’s journey.
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The beginning of day 10, have a chemistry lecture at uni … looking forward to it,I need to revise a lot more …got an assignment to finish this afternoon and gotta take my eldest to the dentist for some fillings…she’s a bit anxious,she’s never had fillings before her ripe old age of 20 …it’s good waking up without a hangover,even though I’m pretty tired from brain work I think…I gotta start exercising again,I think it’s gonna help with energy and blow a few cobwebs away, even if it’s a few jumping jacks 
.
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Woken up at the usual time that my body seems to want to wake up now…about 6.30am…ivehad cup of tea, two cigarettes and s banana and vitamins, feeling a bit anxious, not sure why… .deep breaths…head is crammed full of what I should study and revise today…and also a little thought that’s saying have a day off…er no!.. gonna go on my PEMF mat shortly and see if it recalibrates me a little…it has been amazing for anxiety…I set it to 3hz when really anxious and it helps massively…mayb a need to get a box of bran flakes…!.. maybe getting anxious at going back to work this Saturday… cutting hair is so far from what I’ve been studying the last few months that I feel like an alien going back into work 
…sure it’ll be fine. It’ll be nice to chat and have a laugh with the people I work with. Bants!
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11 days and 20 minutes since last drink…wow,had a funny day today but kept busy, went to garden centre AGAIN! And bought new house plants and more soil …ate too many chocolate biscuits…just did anything I could that was positive,…did 2 loads of washing, submitted another assignment…felt good about it,thought about drinking to celebrate but the scales are tipped to sobriety and sticking to it today , thanks universe, another day sober 
and I got my box of bran flakes plus 2 bottles of hazelnut milk, a bottle of mango squash and a bottle of ribena squash…filling house up with nice drinks to go to when bored and need to fill 'the hole '!!!
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This fills me with joy Hazy. Look at all the positive actions.
Well done!
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12 days 11 hours…last client yesterday thoughts crept in of buying after work,old routine…was tired after work, drove past the old buying shop, obstacle 1 done, balancing thoughts in my head of me me me, drink drink drink…then a light bulb…maybe I should buy dinner for my 2 daughters at home cos they probably haven’t had dinner yet!..so marks and sparks at the bp is the next shop on way home…2 pizzas and 2 sides and chocolate eclairs…AND a MARS BAR for me to eat right away !…that sorted that out, got home free from booze, got to sleep free from alcohol and woke up free from alcohol … thanks universe, I’m feeling ya.
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Something I learnt is that often when we start to waver it’s just that we could do with an energy boost. Water or a snack is ideal for this.
Well done. I’m proud of you.
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