Wow! Powerful! Thanks for sharing
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I’m a little late to reading your latest update because I got so busy I couldn’t log on much yesterday but man, good for you. I hope you’re incredible proud of yourself.
Thank you for sharing all of the ups and downs, your story and your determination really is an inspiration. I can’t wait for you to reach that one year mark!
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Thanks as always for sharing
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Thanks! Sober sailor brotherhood! 
!
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This is my fathers boat “deeahks” it means “lady of the bay” this is what we use for long lining and crab when we have them in our UNA
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Nice! Shes a beauty! A few more days and I’ll be back on the coast where I belong!
Gonna crab my 2nd season on her. We have some cod to catch when I get home, not sure how much is left. She has a permit that allows 25,000, plus whatever open access gives us. Usually 1500ish pounds every two months.
She has a nearshore permit for rockfish, cabezon, and ling cod. With all the permits, we get alot of ling cod per month.
She fishes halibut, salmon, and tuna too.
We are a smaller boat port. We use a crane to launch everytime we go out. That limits the size of boats here. It also eliminates the dangerous bars to cross for us.
Shes a 36 footer.
Im excited to get back out there!
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Nice! She looks like a tank! My boat is a 38 foot also. Its been different learning the Deeahks. Shes a 62 ft beast. Maneuvers a little different then I’m used to. I wish you luck and safety on your upcoming fisheries. And welcome back to the ocean!
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Thank you! Wishing a safe and bountiful season to you too!
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Tonights my last night in slc.
I had anxiety this morning. I still had their computers. I knew I needed to make something happen, but wasnt sure how.
I knew my boys finished school at 2:30. So I waited. I struggled with anxiety, felt guilty for leaving without this being resolved.
I struggled with my anger, and i did my best to not feed into it.
I packed to distract myself. I felt good about getting out of here. I was still feeling guilty.
I distracted myself with memes, and recovery threads. I feel I have things of value to share again. It helped.
At 2:30 I texted both of them. I heard back from my youngest pretty quickly. I decided i should call their aunt before I made plans.
So I did. She didnt answer, so I asked my youngest for the address. He teted back that his aunt said she would call me.
I felt like I was getting blown off again. My anxiety was off the charts.
An hour went by. Then two, then she texted me, and asked me if I could make it before dinner, i said I’m on my way.
I loaded up the computers and headed over. I thought maybe I was getting invited to dinner, but when I got there they told me I had thirty minutes. Whuch I thought was incredibly lame.
But I rolled with it, watched the time while having a nice visit with my boys.
Then I decided to cut my visit with them a little short so I could talk to their aunt.
I was awesome. I leveled the field. I told them about their mom, and how she is still doing things that arent legal. And how i dont want to leave anything I buy over there because Of the unsavory characters that go there and that she has never taken care of anything I jave bought ever and that I worry about the swat team trashing everything because she is doing things that she could get raided for.
I told them i didnt want to share time with her and that I want my own time next year.
I didnt have to get into any specifics about what their mother has been up to. They nodded like they already knew and understood.
I thanked her for keeping them safe. I commended her for their manners and told her how much I appreciated it.
We hugged. It was a genuine, sincere hug. I never imagined that could happen. I made it happen!
I feel like we are starting on level ground again.
I feel so much better about being honest about their mother. I got put on the spot to keep a terrible secret, and it has caused me huge anxiety, because I havent been able to find any solution when I think about it.
So I have lets go of all that toxic sludge ive been carrying. My side of the street is clean. As long as I show up and do the next right thing, the relationship I want to be able to have will happen.
Im going home with a clean conscience.
I didnt let my anger ruin this like I have in the past. Im ready to leave it where it belongs. In the past.
Recovery has given me so many rewards!
I still have work to do. I still have things to fix This one was the biggest. I will tackle the rest. I have confidence in that now.
This will be the first holiday season I wont be suffering because I miss my kids in a long time!
Ive decided to forgive their mom again. I had picked up my anger again after forgiving her at the beginning of this Shes sick. I hope she finds her way back to recovery. Our boys love her.
Coming here this summer put alot of things into perpective. I grew up here. I had a very traumatic childhood here.i have alot of bad memories here, and I never want to live here again or spend six months here. I wont have to.
I still have good friends here. I love some people, but not the place. I escaped.
Tomorrow, im escaping again!
338 days since my final relapse.
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Thank you so much for sharing this. It is really profound and deep. Thank you
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Congratulations on so many fucking things here man. What a great gift to give to yourself. I am so happy for you. And you know you can’t do shit like this if your not sober. What a blessing for your kids. You are amazing. And your calm and patience is incredible.
And 338 freakin day:+1:
Have a nice trip home.
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Safe travels, Jason!
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Have a good trip back to Oreo 
Looking forward to reading your next installment on here 
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I love it when we trust the process and it works out.
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I have had many anxiety attacks as I have walked through this and found myself thinking everything is going to be all right when they happen.
I clung onto that when you said that in the beginning of this journey.
Thank you!
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This place has saved my ass walking through this!
Thank you!
Im off to the airport!
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Safe travels!
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Hope you had a safe flight!
I am so glad you got to clear the air a little before you left. That must have been a huge weight lifted for you. 
Ignoring the ex things, what a great time you had with those kids! They are going to remember this and hold on to it.
You should feel so proud and SO strong after the last couple of months. 
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My last sunrise far away from the ocean. Im excited about tonights sunset. Feeling pretty high on life today!
Didnt leave on probation, and i didnt assault anyone!
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