Sounds like a good day. My whole perception of alcohol changed Right around the 100 day mark. Keep up the good work. I’m so grateful to be sober and free of alcohol.
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Thanks for the post. I have been drinking for 40 years. On and off, I am a vet and we partied hard. We worked hard also. I used to just drink on game days or at the bar. Became a firefighter and the same thing. We played hard and worked just as hard. Saving lives and in the heat was a rush, so we celebrated alot.
I got married at 34. Went a few years without any alcohol. I dont go to bars ect. Started drinking again while working in the garage. That moved to my office downstairs, and on the way home from work Id have one.
Im on day 24. I drink to much and the filter comes off. Then I dont remember what I said. And Ive said the wrong things to the ones I Love the most.
I was not a daily drinker, have no withdrawl symptoms, or cravings. Other than my liver trying to readjust im good, I need support and someone to vent with.
I am not good with labels and have been to a few AA meetings. Its not sticking yet. Im reading the big book as of now, along with other support.
I also use AlAnon resources, as my father was an excessive drinker. He is clean 10+ years I believe.
My wife has been sleeping on the couch or in the camper since day 1.
No discussion, solutions, or resolutions as of yet.
Keep up the work and stay sober.
I am an excessive drinker. If this AA group doesnt stick, Ill see if the VA has one. Support is there in many forms, just find one you relate to and stay with it.
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Just wanted to say that I love reading this thread . Seeing your progress from beginning until now is amazing. Keep it up!!!
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I also tried on my own. I went a year and a half without a drink. And then for no reason at all I picked up that first glass of wine and started drinking everyday. I have learned through AA that sober is not the same as recovery. Doing this thing alone, further isolation and hiding, is just being dry. Alone I could not uncover what causes my drinking. Identifying the cause for my drinking and other character flaws is where true freedom is found. Not easy, but nothing worthwhile is easy. I too didn’t want to share, didn’t want to go, didn’t want to admit. By some higher power I found courage and strength to walk in…… and all my fears were instantly diffused. Only love and acceptance were felt when I walked through the door… you got this! I believe in you! If it could happen for me, it can happen for you!
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Welcome to Talking Sober, friend. There is a thread on here full of great ideas folks have used to get sober and stay sober. Have a look!
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Thanks i will ck this out
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Well i made it. Im sober. 145days. Attending my first wedding and reception since getting sober. I love love and ceremony was wonderful. But damn they had the longest cocktail hour ever! I was doing fine but after dinner when people started two fisting it got tougher. I took breaks, called my sponsor, talked to my hubby. But it got tough and i cried like three times before i had to tap out at 9pm. It was too much. I cried because i was angry that it bothered me sooo much. I wish it didnt bother me. But hey were back at the airbnb sober and thats a win.
Edit it doesnt feel like a win. I feel defeated because being around alcohol bothered me so much. I have 4.5 months but its become abundantly clear i still need to protect myself. Maybe it wont always be like that but im in my sobriety infancy.
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You did great. I had a family wedding this last May to go to… for my wife’s cousin. At that point, I had been sober for 16 months. As soon as the alcohol started flowing, it was very hard for me. My wife immediately senses something was wrong. She got up, got me a tonic water with lime, and I drank those all night long. I ended up having a blast, and stayed sober through all of it. It takes time. I’m not sure I could have gone to an event with alcohol flowing at 4.5 months, like you did. I think you did great!
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What does the Big Book say “spiritual progress not perfection” “some slowly, some quickly “. I think you won! On many levels. Be gentle with yourself. I still can’t go to a sushi bar. All I see is Saki. Whatever it takes to stay sober. And you did that! Yeah for you!!!
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You did it @Cjp! You made it through sober and that’s a huge win. Keep doing what you’re doing and it will get easier.
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You made it though! The fact that it was hard means that it is worth the effort. You fought that demon, used your toolbox effectively and laid a sober head on a pillow. I’m proud of you @Cjp. 
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Thanks @TrustyBird after some reflection i think my “im not good enough” voice was at play because im not “further along” but i fucking did it sober and im proud of that
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My “I’m not good enough” pipes in too now and again. I hate that. Maybe we defeat that little jerk by realizing he lives in all of us.
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I too went to my first sober wedding last September at exactly 4.5 months sober. Even with all the personal progress I thought I had made up to that point through AA and working the steps with my sponsor, it was still incredibly overwhelming. I also had to ask my fiancé if we could leave a little early because it got too overwhelming.
Tonight I’m going to my 5th wedding since getting sober, and I still get a little anxious before them even at almost a year and a half sober.
Be patient with yourself. That first wedding is the hardest. Like all things we learn to do sober the first time is the hardest. I’ve found for me that each one gets a little easier and I’m paying less attention to all the drinking around me.
Big congrats on getting through that first one sober!!
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5 months free today! It seems like forever and not that long at the same time. Im feeling good about sobriety and i want more. Looking forward to getting my chip monday!
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I’m pretty much the same, I used to drink daily but for the past two years have only drank weekends, but when I drink I drink! Can’t control the amount, just keep going until I fall asleep. I haven’t got to the point where I’ll say I’m an alcoholic but I do admit to having a drink problem, I too have found it daunting stopping forever which is why I spent two years limiting it to weekends, but those two days still impact negatively on my life so now I’m ready for a life without it. Baby steps 
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Technically worked thru steps 6 and seven with my sponsor but i feel like theres more i need to do. Idk i feel like my connection with my higher power is weak rn and idk how to grow that connection.
I’ve identified my character defects, in no particular order:
Perfectionism
Self-pity
Fear*
Self centeredness
Jealousy
Lack of confidence
Lying
Laziness
Controlling*
Thinking negatively
Impatient
*fear and controlling thoughts run hand in hand. If i can have those removed asap thad be great. Thanks lol
My assets:
Open-minded
Respectful
To the point
Caring of others
Supportive
Outgoing
Loving
Thoughtful
Realistic goals
Biggest false belief and negative self talk “I am not good enough”
I guess i need to pray to my higher power. Praying still feels weird. Like idk who/what i am praying to. I’ll practice
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Oh Google…how you are evil but i love you so much rn. So i had a super busy day and then got home, alone and feeling lonely. I said im gonna google.
Preface: im trying to grow spiritually. Im not one to follow an organized religion. I believe in energies and the universe and everything happens for a reason. So in AA when they say pray i struggle because i’ve been raised to know a christian god. But the universe doesnt have a face. Idk why im hung up on that. Maybe i just need to identify an image to pray to. Maybe it doesnt have to be a face.
I Explored other religions and beliefs in high school and college. Ive been claiming agnostic for years. But AA has renewed my curiousity in spirituality.
Anyways i google “how to have faith in the universe” and google didnt disappoint. I found a page that spoke of surrendering to the universe.
A couple excerpts that spoke to me:
Anyways come to find out this was a page for an empath in canada who wants $6000CAD for 6 months of sessions. Lol good thing im not manic or id book it right away.
Anyways, growing spiritually thanks to google
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At least half of my AA crew don’t see their higher power as Jesus or the Christian God, but we are ALL very spiritual. I really appreciate that about the organization.
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