11:30pm here
much love to you all
goodnight
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Very nice and well put. First time Iāve seen your serious side. I was waiting for a punch line 
Wishing you another sober day tomorrow.
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wow all of you really impressed me today
all of this communication
sobriety and recoveryā¦ wow
calling it a early day
goodnight
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I had to ask someone the other day whether these are the thoughts of a mad person or someone getting depressed but Iāve been googling if homeless people can claim benefit from the government bc everything in life is just mad, work colleagues are bonkers, Laura is literally insane sometimes and wouldnāt it be nice just to be left alone and become a hermit sitting watching the sea all day or walking around with all the time in the world with no stress and no one telling you what to do and when. Iāve done it before so TBH the only thing putting me off is the weather in the winter. Just thinking out loud but the fact Iāve considered it enough to Google it makes me think it might happen bc first we think it then we do it. Be strong be grateful.
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Well im still not homeless 
decided I would have nowhere to charge my phone. So going through a bit of a low phase at the moment nothing to bad but canāt be deliriously happy forever and thatās OK I know that. brief thought of drink today soon passed though as the memories of the last relapse are still fresh. I think Iām at that stage in recovery when you find other people a bit annoying and want to change just more than being sober. I am sober though and thatās the main thing. Be strong be grateful.
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During one of my daughterās recent meltdowns, she said she was moving out and was going to live on the streets. She starts packing up her phone, laptop, 4 game systems but no clothes. I said āthereās no outlets on the street to charge all that stuff youāre takingā. Then she gets even more pissed off, unpacks her stuff and says āI guess I have no choice but to stay.ā The only thing on her mind was electronics, not food, shelter, clothes or water. 
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and you all continue to teach, amaze, and supporte
much love to you all
goodnight
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Got nothing to say that I havenāt already said before so tuff luck you lot but just for people new to this crazy dance itās not all gonna be great and itās not always gonna feel like itās worth it but take each emotion in your stride bc another one will be along shortly and with a little bit of practice and a little bit of time you get to decide how you want to feel, there is a chemical imbalance going on in your body and once it all levels out you will figure out your place in life and you will find itās a hell of a lot better than where you were. So take a front row seat hold on tight and enjoy the ride, be strong be grateful and Iāll meet you on the other side.
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Day out in nature appreciating the little things in life, sun on your back and wind in your hair, actually too hot and no breeze but Iāll take what I can get. Went to the pub again for a soft drink with the other half, Iām in control but definitely have to keep my wits about me bc a quick shandy felt like a good idea for a few minutes but it would never end there and it would never end well. Its nice that itās not a taboo subject though and Laura can still have a summer time drink, sheās one of the lucky ones just one pint and itās over. Did notice all of the blokes huge beer guts hanging over there shorts though so thought I would breath in a bit and show off Anyway be strong and as ever Be grateful.
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Do you know what youāve really gotta want to be sober for yourself bc TBH I do do it for me but I kinda hope that other people will benefit ie, the Mrs, but she never seems happy these days. The more sober I get and the more I do things it all just seems an inconvenience to her bc sheās happy just sitting there in the same old stoned state and to top it off she told me she wants to stop smoking but does nothing about it. We canāt just sit there wanting life to bend to our will, it owes us nothing and we owe it everything bc without it we ARE nothing. So go out there and work for what you want, health, wealth happiness itās up to you but donāt look back in 20 years time and say I couldāve or I shouldāve. The time is NOWā¦ Be strong be grateful be active.
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Iām going to bed sober knowing that I got through another dayā¦
Remember to be kind to yourselfā¦
3 weeks ago today I tried to take my lifeā¦
Open your eyes and see the beauty around you.
I accept Iām an addict but I know I have a good heart x
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Lovely to read this.
Well that was out of the blue but here I am again and here I go again. @Bomdhil I always admire your commitment to keep coming back and keep trying but I reckon I must have got a bronze medal myself by now. Never give in. Be strong and even when you canāt be strong there is always a reason to be grateful.
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I give you credit for always coming back and never giving up. I thought about you when I saw this quote.
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oh Iāll never stop trying, Iām drinking a hell of a lot less than I used to. The alternative is death.
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Iāve had to steal that for future reference
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So I wouldnāt say I was feeling down but that relapse did take away a bit of my mojo. Thoughts of drinking and smoking did cross my mind today but I canāt go down that road so soon and so easily. Stay focused and let one night of fun stay one night of fun and not years of misery trying to get back what I lost. Be strong be grateful.
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Sober today, made more correct decisions than usual bc I could have drank a few times today so rather than just sit there feeling sorry for myself I got off my arse and did anything that distracted me. The thoughts were not for long but they were there and Iām expecting it so soon after a slip up so Iām staying strong and going to bed grateful as ever.
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Woo hoo! Iām so proud of you for staying strong. Keeping you in my prayers for another sober day tomorrow.
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