Wow, times are crazy, days are crazy, I’m crazy, your all crazy good, this whole sobriety journey is definitely crazy. The world could end tommorow and I could make it all about me.
Just when I thought I knew it all im still totally oblivious to one simple fact, I cannot, must not and should not believe I can DRINK.
One more go. Be safe.
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another long day working, no drinking though today so that’s good, it was getting to easy to drink for a while they’re so glad to be busy. be strong and be safe.
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Stay the course Paul. One day at a time friend. Sleep well. 
another mixed day of emotions, the virus might last months but my body won’t if I don’t stop picking up. At least I feel like I took back some control for my self. I will get back to where I was, I will expect no less. Times are changing but I will only concentrate on what I know I can change, and that’s me.
Back to step 1,i am powerless, I must accept this bc I can’t keep fighting what I can’t beat.
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that’s a sober day done, back to baby steps but some of the most important. Keeping positive, mindfulness and meditation. Night.
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Every sober day is a win. 
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day 2 done. Why do I love the feeling of being sober and every now and again think it’s better drunk, maybe 100s of years ago when I was young and it was fun. There’s no fun being a lonely secret, bottle hiding lieing drinker. 3 people down in my section at work so busy times ahead and the power keeps going out at home.
Wish I had more positives but what ya gonna do, just crack on with it. Be strong.
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The easiest day 3 of sobriety I’ve ever had, only once did it enter my head and it was only a thought not a nagging suggestion. Be strong.
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Why does time go so quick the older you get. My days consist of waiting to go to bed.
It’s like bloody Xmas in my house she bought loads of food to stockpile and I keep eating everything, she reckons she doesn’t want to have to survive with me.
Well I fooled her bc I’ve only just been surviving myself for 30+ years being an alcoholic, so I would say I’m just the man you need in a life threatening crisis, I’ve not even blinked in 3 decades and I’ve seen some scenes.
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day done, UK on lock down, I’m going to have to give up smoking again now, interesting bc I was gonna wait until I had a few more sober days behind me. I’ve learnt from experience that I’m not good at giving up both at the same time, gets a bit messy.
Thank god I don’t drink bc from the mind of an alcoholic that would definitely be seen as an essential journey. Be strong out there be safe and be sane.
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Hopefully this lock down will help us to beat this bastard virus. Like yours my work is considered essential so I’m happy that I won’t be going stir crazy stuck in the house. I wonder how many people will be attested for flouting the new rules. One good thing is that drug dealers will have to stop driving their drugs around to customers. Be safe at work pal. 
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Well I gotta walk to work, walk home, walk dog for daily exercise and walk to the shop. I may need a disguise.
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I wake up to day 7 so positive start to the day. I’m so glad I don’t drink bc the old me would be going nuts with everything that’s going on. My strength feels like a snowball rolling down a hill, the further I go the bigger it gets.
Do ya wanna build a snowman 
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OK so that 1st week is out the way again. Not gonna get complacent bc I had them thoughts again today. Why can’t my mind just be happy as it is, why no matter how many times you know you hate it something just tells you to have one. It’s like having two me’s inside me and I’m always trying to stick up for the good guy…
Off licence are now classed as an essential shop, yep if you want to make some money keep the alcoholics spending, trust me there’s was always money for beer.
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Hey, you forgot to say goodnight. Now I’m not gonna be able to sleep. 
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sorry I’ll try harder in the future just had nothing to report.
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Goodnight from New Zealand 
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I want to live in New Zealand. its got a good worldly vibe going on.
It’s fairly chill I suppose but it has its issues like anywhere else. I love the natural beauty here.
One of my favourite YouTube channels is from a guy in NZ, Scott brown carpentry. I was considering moving there for a little while.
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