I’m struggling with aftermath depression. I’m 1 day sober. I had a bad night on Friday. I decided not to drink anymore, and I know that’s step one, but I’m haunted by my own actions. I feel worthless. I want to hide and sleep all day.
When will I stop hating myself? How long does this feeling last?
I’m too tired to shower. I haven’t brushed my hair or teeth all weekend. I’m thirsty, but the idea of drinking water exhausts me. I feel sick. I keep crying out of nowhere.
Welcome @Spidergirl85
Looks like you got some great suggestions so far.
It is just natural we all feel guilty about our past. But when we sober up we become something else. Not our past. We cannot change the past. But we can build a hell of a future. Just one day at a time. Feel what you’re feeling. If you got to be a bum all day. Then do it. Just don’t drink today. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. I was pretty useless my first day sober. And you know what? It past.
Here’s a couple of useful threads to look at.
Read around when your up to it. Join in when you feel comfortable.
Lots of great people around here for support.
It’s too hard to do it alone. We all need support.
Start by doing the little things to keep your mind off of drinking. Do things that will just make yah feel better off overall. Get up from your bed, take a shower, then start cleaning up your living area. Listen to some music on YouTube or motivational things (I never get tired of listening to these things). You improve your surroundings (clean area) and you’ll feel a bit better.
I noticed that you have 85 at the end of your name. I was born in 1985 myself and I’m telling you from my own experience that it’s never too late to start all over again, my friend. I have a lot to say about people from our generation but that’s not important now. What’s important is that you start understanding Yourself now and to start that you have to continue with this sobriety you’ve chosen to do.
For now I say take solace knowing the best thing you can do is not drink today. It’s totally understandable to feel this way, lord knows I did too.
Sober we need worry less about doing any more damage, and we’re clear headed again to take whatever happens head on. So keep it up!
As the physical stuff levels out you might also really like a program of recovery. It can do wonders for going after what’s really gnawing at us. A way of living life on life’s terms, free of drink.
Sometimes we drink too self medicate. Work closely with your doctor during your journey. The first layer to unpeel may be the alcoholism. The other layers could be depression and issues related to that. You’ll want to get to the core, eventually. But one step at a time Focus on you and self care right now.
