I think I felt crazy mostly because of the talking out loud lol but I do that anyways 
the hubs is always like are your talking to me or yourself
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Today started so good. Got my jeep serviced, got the hubs work clothes washed, cleaned and the list goes on. I got bored… I got whiskey 
but I had 1 drink and poured the rest down the sink. I don’t feel like I’ve failed per say but I definitely need to learn to control these weak moments. It’s like once my mind is made up there is no logic that will change it. I wasn’t going to tell the hubs cause well I’m disappointed and feel so weak minded but we don’t lie. So I told him what happened because I may have an addiction but I don’t lie. Tomorrow is a new day and I’m going to try and find some AA meetings. I really need some in person because I’m already so isolated with working from home. I just know what I’m doing apparently isn’t working.
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Hey @Runningfree! Sorry you are going thru a rough time. Isolation and WFH has truly made being/staying sober a challenge for me. Lots of zoom meetings of different support varieties out there. I miss in person as well. Hang in there and glad you are here.
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Thank you for taking a minute to respond. I know I’m not alone but at the same time feel so alone. I may look into zoom as a last resort because I know some in person would be best for my mental Heath (whole nother can of worms)
I’m not sure how to put what I’m feeling into words. I had a pretty shitty day. The hubs was in a bad mood which put me in a bad mood and work was stressful. I’m sober but in a pretty crap mood. Maybe tomorrow will be better.
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I hear you Jenn. It’s been tough 
See if you cab find some local meetings that are operating. AA (www.AA.org is one option; there are others as well:
Resources for our recovery
I’m sure you’ll find what you need. Search, search, search, keep looking, never stop trying - you will find what you need.
You’re a good person who’s gotten lost. It happened by accident and you didn’t intend for this to happen. You’re not alone: this problem has happened to many thousands of people before you. It doesn’t make you a bad person, or a failure. It makes you a person who’s a little lost and is looking to find her way home.
You will find your way home Jenn. Never give up and never stop searching. You’ll find what you need 
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Today I was suppose to go to a group fitness class to try and meet some people but before I left the house I checked their Facebook page and the class was cancelled. I did a virtual workout and hung with the hubs and then took a nap. Overall it was a ok day. Back to 3 days no drinking so that’s good.
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Awesome Jenn! Happy to hear it sister. Time at home is a blessing
This past weekend was a blur of sleep. I’ve been working so much I didn’t know what to do with 2 days off lol I did get some cleaning and cooking done but that’s it. Today I was back to work (remotely) and got a 3.5 mile run in then made dinner and picked up. I actually prefer days that I work. It’s like when I’m off work I have no motivation to do anything. Hope everyone is well
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I know the feeling! Glad you made it through sober Jenn. That’s something. That’s a good something
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Hello there, I can relate to feeling like a roller coaster, which is why I chose to declare “stop the ride!” I wanted off. As much as my husband- who is truly my favorite person in the world- pleaded with me to stop drinking so much, I’d say yes, I’m sorry, I will! Why couldn’t I just do it for him? Because it doesn’t work that way. I believe something has to click. Keep focusing on the things and people that make your life worth living. And find more of that.
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I enjoyed therapy.
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I have enjoyed parts of it. I actually like the thoughts that make me reflect on myself
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My why is multi faceted because yes I am quitting for myself and for my health but I’m also quitting to save my marriage. He has asked before and I have said no. He has pleaded and asked if I love booze more than him. I’m not sure what changed but he finally convinced me to quit but I’m not just doing it for him. He was just the first step.
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Its hard digging in sometimes but totally worth it…
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Today was a good day. The hubs replaced some
Blinds I’ve been wanting since we got our house and they look so good. I appreciate when he gets his hunny dos done lol I worked a double so no time for anything else which is fine by me cause I didn’t have anything else to do.
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That’s awesome about those blinds! Any photos?
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I need an opinion of sorts. I know there are plenty of ways to approach issues. I’m looking for a different one. Issue: husband does not pick up after himself. Scenario: I pick up, do dishes and so forth. Go to bed and wake up to snack packages and soda cans and dirty dishes. You get the point.
I have already talked to the hubs and told him how it makes me feel when he does this. He works long shifts (12-16hrs) and I’m not asking him to clean. I’m only asking for him to pick up after himself. I just am not sure how to communicate “be an adult and pick up your shit. I’m not your maid”
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Sorry I just saw that. I took a halfway picture
we went from the white to the oak grey.
Today was a pretty good day. Was able to go the group fitness class today and met some ladies. I still haven’t found an in person AA meeting but I might just need to do some zoom meetings. I’m rounding out day 7. So that’s nice. I also did a few things at the house. Days off from work I get so bleh. Watched Tower Heist and it was a pretty good movie
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Oh no! Trouble at home 
Seriously though I can imagine how annoying that must be. It’s this little thing, every day, and it grinds away.
I decided to marry someone who is a bit of a pack rat (not terrible but also not always cleaning) and so we kind of fit into each other’s imperfections
This type of thing is so common though in relationships. It’s weird because it’s things that are in the big picture so minor. Like earlier today I was trying to work and I was so irritated at the noises my wife makes while she eats. It sounds silly but it was all I could hear while I was trying to get things done, and I just wanted to turn around and say, didn’t anyone teach you table manners?
At the same time though there are so many things she contributes at home too. Ultimately I look at it in that perspective: I married the whole person.
I’m not sure if this is helpful or not. Sorry about that 
I wish I had a process or something that could help. I hope it helps anyway just to know that you’re not alone
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