103 is awesome! Keep living Life!
Loving that typoā¦
āOtters storiesā at AA meetings.
Those otters. Always boasting about the fish they ate and how good they are at swimming.
And they never help with the washing up after meetings. 
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Lmaoā¦ I wrote other Polish instead of other people in a reply to someone else yesterday too!! New phone!! Or was it those pesky otters again??? Who knows? 
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I donāt know if I ever felt a āsober highā but it was nice to get to a point where my next drink wasnāt tje only thing I thought about or looked forward to. I just fell off the wagon after 133 days, and in that time the only thing I looked forward to was my next cig. I donāt recommend trading one vice for another. ā¦I concurā¦It is not always amazing.
Well said!
Day 9 is still something to be proud of. You canāt use lack of support as an excuse. Are you attending any type of meetings? Do you have a sponser? Those people will be your support and this group seems like a support. You are emotional because you are starting to feel things again, emotions that you were numb to and put aside by drinking. Ypur happiness will be soon to follow. There is nothing to gain from picking up again except your old ways and that dark rabbit hole. Stay positive and focused.
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Your almost thereā¦ and I love to see this.
My experience, strength and hope comes from attending for that exact reasonā¦ FEAR!
At around day 11, I noticed them asking for volunteers to go conduct Thursday night meetings at the rehab hospital.
What better way to cling to fear, than to see that level of pain. So I immediately want to get involved with that.
The AA member warned me, that it sometimes is not a good idea for a newcomer to go. People there can be nonresponsive, and it can feel like a waste of time. But we do what we do, we go, we carry the message, and we HOPE to reach somebody.
I did not care about any of that. I needed that reminder of the ugliness.
After my 3 time about day 35ā¦ Alan walks into our Friday night meeting, and announced that he was not impressed with any AA groupās during his rehab time, and had pretty much decided it was a waste.
But Michael, Dominique and Chris showed up last night and he felt like maybe he should at least check it out.
It was at that moment ā¦ my pain, fear and worry, my obsession was removed.
I donāt attend AA anymore to keep myself sober. I attend AA because me staying involved could possibly pass along this great gift that I received.
I want the hand of AA always available to the one still sufferingā¦ for that I am responsible.
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You are in day 9. Very early. Iām in day 20 and I still have cravings but I feel so much better. Just stick with it !
for me it took time I have just over 9 months and I have good and bad days but most are good. I had never had more than a couple months clean in over 20 years of drug abuse. I am so much happier than ever before because I have integrity now and I can look myself in mirror and not see a piece of shit anymore. I pray everyday and ask God for peace in my heart thatās all I ever truly wanted. best of luck on your journey I believe in you. also my addiction was meth and heroin if I can do it I know you can do it and have happiness and peace in your heart
I just had this conversation with my sponsor yesterday. I said "I donāt know where I got the idea that life was supposed to feel good all the time. Thatās why I got high, because I knew that at least once a day I was going to feel good even if it was just for a few minutes and even if shit was going to be even worse when I came down. But it seems ānormalā people live their lives knowing instinctively that thereās going to be days that donāt feel good and they are ok with that and they push through them. But my sobriety came with the harsh reality that lifeās going to kick my ass some days and I canāt just run off and use so I can feel ābetterā. I have to just deal with it. Damn that sucks. " Lol some days all I can think is this shit sucks. But when I finally get to a point where I can look back and be proud of myself , thatās the day Iām working towards.
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I am in AA and your comment reminded me of one the promises. I will never forget this young guy in a meeting one day said how he didnāt get how so many were so happy and amazed with the program. An old timer spoke up and saidā¦Youāre not halfway through. I laughed. Some of you in the program will get the jokeā¦lol. Not sure if you are in a program but, no matter your pathā¦I pray you have a wonderful journey. Best wishes.
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I feel you. Iām on day 6 and questioning how to have fun again without alcohol. That in itself is a scary thought, that I donāt know how to just enjoy life and have fun without alcohol?? Itās one of the reasons why Iām here because thatās not normal. Yes Iām craving and I feel bored and anxious but knowing Iām not going to do anything stupid tonight because Iām drunk is a really good feeling. I think we have to think of it as āre-wiringā our brain. Our brain has been accustomed to recognizing fun as alcohol and now we have to give our brain time to recognize how to have fun without the alcohol.
Haha 
Oh dang I wish it was all roses and rainbows!! I personally did not experience that right off the bat and honestly there are still many tough days. I just got 90 days after a one day slip right before my 6 month chip. Each day, however, I become more aware of how I really feel and on those bad days I am able to use some of the tools I have learned through this program. During active addiction (drinking) I never took time to notice my emotions if I even had them lol. I drank no matter what happy, sad, excited, bored, tiredā¦ the list goes on.
Those tears you are crying is proof that the cloud is lifting just a little. Stick with it and the light will shine through. When people say this is a simple program they are right in that the formalities are simple, but the emotional rollercoaster is quite hell for all of us at the beginning.
Love and strength sent your way,
Ashauna
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A supportive friend of mine just sent this to me. I think it is a very accurate description of our journey, and worthy of sharing.
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So I have no idea what a sober high is. I go from absolutely incredibly depressed to happy in a day. All in the same day. Its confusing and I hate it. I feel like Iām bipolar. Which isnāt a great feeling.
Then Iāll be fine and think it was all in my head.
I hope someday though, when Iām day 6792, it will be amazing. Cuz today was confusingā¦
Why did you quit? Write those reasons down. Did you quit for yourself or someone else? I tried to quit smoking weed a bunch of times and was unsuccessful because I wasnāt doing it for me. You have support here. The only one who is hello g you that you canāt is yourself!
Day 9 and youāre doing great. I was about to give up in my second week too. But, I held on to it. Itās not easy if you ask me. But itās definitely worth it. It gets better as days pass by. Withdrawal symptoms are at the peaks in the second week. Thatās what my doctor told me. As soon as you reach day 14, youāll start to notice the good feeling and itās totally worth it. You can try rewarding yourself for being sober each day. Just a small treat. It could be a cupcake or a pair of jeans that you always wanted to buy. Believe me, life is gonna be so much better being sober. Keep yourself busy. Find a new hobby. Talk to people. Youāll start to crawl soon. Then limp and walk. Finally youāll be able to run. Good luck and stay motivated. We are all sailing the same boat here. Youāre not alone!
Soberity is amazing. Your past, or your regrets, or trama is what sucks. And if you have these issues itās not trama anonymous, its alcoholics anonymous and you will likely need outside help
Damn.
I have to relate to some extent. There are definitely moments in life where being sober isnāt amazing. Afterall, if it was all rainbows and unicorns, we wouldnāt need AA, other support groups and this forumā¦for example.