Binge eating recovery daily check in thread (Part 2)

[Misokatsu]

I was tired and head aching from my first day back at work, and was really contemplating getting something sweet from the convenience store. But I had some mints, got home, drank some coffee and waited until dinner time.

[Sissychris39]

Thank you

[tailee17]

[CATMANCAM]

@Sissychris39 you are not a failure, 30 days is amazing! Just keep going and you will get back on track again
@Aleyadaisey happy birthday!

70 days no takeaways.
66 days no ice cream.
9 days no sugar.
4 days no crisps, no binge-eating.

The usual (for me) days 4-7 cravings have started and are pretty intense. I’ll get through this.

🩵

[acromouse]

@Misokatsu Good job on breaking the habit.
@Aleyadaisey Happy Birthday!
@Sissychris39 Don’t be hard on yourself. Be kind to yourself. Look back onto what led to the relapse. What were you in need of? We usually relapse way before we actually binge.
@CATMANCAM Congrats on not listening to the cravings and finding different ways of dealing with discomfort.

301 sugar
165 UPF
39 gluten
39 dairy

[Jana1988]

Very happy birthday @Aleyadaisey Wishing you all the very best!

[Jana1988]

Hi everyone

Having nice 4 days without binging! @CATMANCAM we have synchronized counter

I listened another episode of the podcast I mentioned before, called ‘How To Defeat Your Cravings’ and made some notes.

Hope you don’t mind me sharing, I’m finding these interesting and helpful.

I wrote down more and less what have been said on the podcast, but it’s not quoting as I changed the words and sentences to make it easier to remember for me.

This one explains how I felt the other day, when I discovered that I don’t have to act on my cravings. It’s a host on the podcast talking to the guy who does the podcast and explaining how his perspective changed after reading the podcaster’s book:

• The voice which was telling me to binge, to give in the cravings, wasn’t me. I used to think that the voice was me and that there was nothing I can do. Almost like playing a tag of war (not sure if I got the name of the game correctly) against this incredible powerful oponent - much bigger and stronger than I. I was struggling with that for so many years and I was trying to get strong enough to win the tag of war. And then you’re telling me to drop the rope.

Here, the podcaster talks and explains stuff about creating rules in eating:

• It was the dialogue in my head constantly going “Maybe you should do this, maybe you should do that…”, and I couldn’t really recognise when there was a thought in my head justifying indulgence. I was distracted from doing the practical things that would make a difference (as opposed to mental work).
  It turned out that we have the right to organise our thoughts in a way that we want and by drawing clear lines like saying “I won’t eat chocolate on week days” I was suddenly able to clearly distinguish the thoughts that encouraged me to stay with my plan. It became this vehicle for being able to know what was the constructive and what was the destructive thought about food and it let me stop changing my mind about rules which I am going to follow when I just made it really clear.
  This one helps me personally a lot, I always thought there should be no rules in eating, as well as tagging food as good or bad. But having small clear rules which are also achievable helps me to recognise which thoughts are Ed.

• When introducing the eating rules, it’s better to start with setting up a lower bar and have rather smaller goals, so we don’t loose motivation, because too big at once or unrealistic goals don’t last. One simple rule which is being achieved over longer period of time will help us with self-confidence, trust in the process and will point us to the right direction. It has a positive effect.
  → Don’t be afraid to draw a stric line by using words “Never”, or “Always”. It helps to stick with the rule. (It doesn’t need to be “I will never eat chocolate again.” - unrealistic huge goal. It can be “I will never eat chocolate again after 8pm.” - Smaller achievable goal.)

This makes me think about your “relaps” and "feeling like a failure @Sissychris39 :

• You need to recognise that this is a process and it’s not like a straight line walking down the side of the mountain, because if you remember that, you won’t think that there’s something wrong with you when you have this sudden increase in intensity of your cravings again. Instead you can be prepared to overcome it;
  → When you experience cravings, go and do something to distract you (e.g. walk), the cravings should pass in 10-15mins (it works for me)
  → Remember that you have to do this work only once, over a period of months, but the benefit is that for rest of your life you won’t have to be tortured by cravings anymore
  → It is important, especially at the beginning, to regularly and reliably eat healthy nutrition levels every day. If you’re in desire of weight loss, maybe don’t think about it just yet. It’s better to adapt the “good” eating habits first and then build up from there.

• Experiencing sudden cravings looks like if people are getting a case of screws so they can say “Oh screw it up, I’ll start tomorrow.” Such irrational thoughts help us not to feel guilty when we’re doing something we didn’t want to do at a first place. There’s the same irrationally created state of emergency in our brain when it just feels like we’re not having everything we need right now, and some urgent action is required*(eating/binging)*. So more you can plan to take care of everything, more you can breathe and be able to recognise that you have everything you need right now.

• Cravings have the most power when these survival cells in the brain are most active. They can put aside any rational thinking;
  → It’s good to understand what cravings are from this physiological view, because then we can better asses why feel like we feel. We can take a step back from it and see the cravings as an amazing action created by our brain to persuade us to be leas discriminative in food choices. We can be above it and look at it and feel appreciation and amazement rather than this inner struggle.

[Sissychris39]

Omg, thank you so much

[Aleyadaisey]

@acromouse
@tailee17
@Jana1988
@CATMANCAM
Thank you all so much!

[Sissychris39]

Day 1
No binge eating

[Aleyadaisey]

Day 1376 : No binge today.

[Jana1988]

Good morning
Day 5 no binging

Today meditation was concentrated on body’s sensations as well as on breath. I want to experiment today and be more aware of these and see how I feel from inside out before any actions.

[acromouse]

@Jana1988 Thank you for writing up your insights from the podcast. I find them very helpful as they make me rethink assumptions I have that I realise are not serving me. And a great streak you’ve got going on there!
@Sissychris39 Good to see you back on track.

302 sugar
166 UPF
40 gluten
40 dairy

[CATMANCAM]

@acromouse thank you congrats on 40 days no gluten or dairy
@Jana1988 we do

71 days no takeaways.
67 days no ice cream.
10 days no sugar.
5 days no crisps, no binge-eating.

Cravings were not so bad yesterday, and I fell asleep by 8pm so no meds induced appetite.

🩵

[Jana1988]

I had a bit of chocolate today after dinner. Ok, when I say a bit, I mean almost a half But, I didn’t have full half, which makes me a better person hahaha

Firstly, I didn’t have anything sweet for 5 days straight and man, the first few bites were so disgustingly sweet! (I don’t even know why I ate more of it )

Secondly, it bloated me almost instantly and now I feel discomfort in my tummy. It’s like pregnant swollen (I didn’t feel like this for last 5 days). That proves what I thought for long time - that my body doesn’t like chocolate. I don’t know, maybe I am intolerant, I just know I don’t feel well at all after it…

Thirdly and absolutely unreasonably I want more ??? Yeah, I have now cravings for biscuits in the cupboard which I know that also make me always feel bad. My mind goes places like “You can go chocolate clean from tomorrow.”, or “It won’t matter, you already feel anyway, so what’s the difference if you have couple of biscuits (read a package).” …
Well, I am wiser than that and I know it’s bloody Ed.
I set up a rule “One sweet a day.” and the rule has been met today. Other excuses are Ed - not me. I don’t want to be where he’s trying to get me. Playing the tape forward, I’d feel disappointed tomorrow if I’d wake up realising that I ate biscuits. I am also thinking about their taste and how it feels to eat them and there’s no real pleasure in that image either. I usually end up eating this stuff headlessly anyway

I am not having the biscuits and anything else tonigh and I’m going to check in tomorrow and have 6 days without binging!!!

[Aleyadaisey]

Day 1377 : No binge today.

[acromouse]

@CATMANCAM Glad to hear you got to sleep early and was not pestered by cravings. Do you know which meds trigger those cravings? And is there an option to take them at another time of the day so that the craving period comes later when you are more likely to be asleep?
@Jana1988 Really good to be part your journey here, how you are discovering your patterns and having a new perspective on experiences around food.

303 sugar
167 UPF
41 gluten
41 dairy

I ate more then necessary yesterday, felt stuffed, whined a bit about it at home, and felt like a normal person who just overate once.

[Jana1988]

Day 6 no binging

Habits are really a thing. It is not easy, because when the brain wants something I must be really present and able to use my rational thinking to overcome it. I hope it will indeed get easier, because sometimes I wonder if there will be moments when I’ll just act on impulse because my rational brain won’t be at home

It is a hard work to get it right, to change these habits which don’t serve me. I must keep on mind instantly why I am doing this, who I am becoming, who I want to be today, how I want to feel today and in the future.

With every successful day, I love the process. When failed, not as much. Let’s not to fail again

[CATMANCAM]

@acromouse it’s atleast 2 of them, but it’s the meds that help me sleep so I take them 2hrs before my planned sleep time. It’s just that I’ve always suffered with insomnia so they dont always work. I think my addict has something to do with it too, making me stay up late researching random stuff and going out to buy strawberries when I should be trying to sleep.

72 days no takeaways.
68 days no ice cream.
11 days no sugar.
6 days no crisps, no binge-eating.

It was another late night last night. My inner rebel didn’t want to go to sleep early.

I have still been eating strawberries and mango every day, sometimes multiple times a day, but I allowed this for myself until I’d achieved a week without bingeing, so today is the last day.

I’m ready for peace from addictive behaviours.

🩵

[acromouse]

It will get easier, I can assure you of that. When I started this journey I declined every invitation where trigger foods would be in my face, and I had to make a conscious and deliberate effort not to reach for them, as my brain was sure this was the good stuff.
Now I have retrained my brain and when I see something sweet my brain automatically goes “this is bad, this is poison, I don’t want it” and I feel rather disgusted or just neutral. Even when I have a hormonally induced craving for junk food the retrained part of my brain is quite sure that it does not want that at all. It just does not recognize this as food anymore.
What obviously helps is not buying this stuff. If I want my brain to consider something not edible, not buying it reinforces this idea.
Hang in there, it will get easier with time.