Im doing good with intermittent fasting, 8 consecutive days. Still eating more sugar than I would like to eat. But that’s next step.
7 Likes
12 days no binge
Feeling super good today, because we had a cake today in the office. I somehow managed to get myself a reputation of a cake lover, so whenever there’s a cake in the office (and that’s quite often), everyone immediately think of me, sometimes people get a cake only to please me.
Whenever I wasn’t binging, being in the office on a “cake day” was one of my biggest fears as I never knew how to handle it. Sugar crash on these days was inevitable…
When my colleagues let me know there will be a cake today in the office my first thought was about eating a lots of it, as that is what I always did. Then I realised that it doesn’t need to be that way and that I have this rule of “one sweet thing a day” and I decided to stick with it. For the first time I was actually choosing which cake I perhaps want the most and I enjoyed its taste when I ate it. I never returned for another piece!! I am so happy about it.
I was fortunate because today the cake was at a different table where I couldn’t see from my desk. It surely helped, but I believe that I would be successful either way. I’m not scared of a next ‘cake day’ anymore.
8 Likes
79 days no takeaways.
75 days no ice cream.
18 days no sugar.
3 days no crisps, no binge-eating.
I fell asleep around 7pm and woke up at 2am, safe again. 
I bought something for dinner from the shop yesterday afternoon, along with fruit for this morning.
I do still want and need to stop going to the shop though, next month needs to be very different financially.
🩵
8 Likes
13 days no binge
I’d like to share some insights to one of the episodes from a podcast I am listening to. Just in case someone else would find it as well helpful
First, I’d like to say that for a long time I didn’t believe in having ‘rules’ in recovery, in fact, I thought it’s rather harmful as it meant restrictions. But this doctor’s therapy is based on ‘rules’ and I am glad I gave it a go, because this way does really work for me so far.
Episode: Matt didn’t break a single food rule for one full year
The guest:
Definition of food monster (the inner voice)
There’s me and there’s this ‘food monster’ - the destructive thought process. So I - me, the intelligent my intelect, my best thinking - I created my bright line food rules and any thought, any voice, anything saying that I should break these rules is a ‘food monster’. It’s coming from the bad guy, from the part of my brain that’s been high jacked by the ‘food like substance’ industry that wants me to eat and spend more more more. The ‘food monster’s’ voice sounds like mine, but because it’s telling me to break the rules, it’s clear that it’s the ‘food monster’, not me.
It doesn’t matter whether it sounds like it makes sense or not, anything that tells me to break my rules is a thing I’m not going to debate.
Two common sentences from ‘food monster’ when trying to persuade us to binge:
-
You can start again tomorrow.
→ If you make a mistake today, it’s going to make it harder tomorrow.
→ If you keep waiting till tomorrow it doesn’t really happen. There’s no real tomorrow, there’s always NOW.
→ No, food monster, why don’t YOU try to start over tomorrow! -
I will get you eventually, so you might as well give in now.
→ It’s always now, so if I don’t binge now, you won’t eventually get me. Tomorrow will still be now.
→ It’s always today and if I win today, it makes tomorrow easier and more likely, so today counts.
→ Even if I’m going to screw up tomorrow, even if you’re going to get me at some point, even if I eventually make a mistake - so what?! That doesn’t mean I should do it now. My computer is going to break eventually, but it doesn’t mean that I should break it right now.
→ Winning today matters -for my physical health, my mental health, and it gives me confidence, so even if from now until the day I die I can only win one day, I’m going to choose today.
Don’t debate with me if it’s possible. Let’s just do it first and then we can debate later.
You don’t even hit rock bottom. You make your rock bottom when you start climbing.
8 Likes
Day 1385 : No binge today. 
6 Likes
14 days (2 weeks) no binge today
This feels so good!!
So far, I’m doing and feeling well. During these two weeks I didn’t go through a big struggle which would have to be fight with willpower, which certainly helps, because from my experience I know that one runs out of willpower eventually. I am looking for a solution which ideally doesn’t involve using willpower. Of course there must be little bit involved, but it shouldn’t be torturing difficult, if you know what I mean.
I realised that having few simple rules to make clear my everyday eating goals helps me hugely to avoid inner fights between my conflicting thoughts. These simple rules at place are making the decision for me, and so there’s nothing to debate about. It would have to be breaking the rules, which is not an option.
So instead of exhaustingly fighting one thought for hours, it became a very short and easy process, like:
Ed: “Jana, you can have another sweet.”
Me: “No, thanks, I have a rule ONE SWEET A DAY. So it’s not happening.”
Then I think about what it is I really need?
Maybe I am hungry and need some nutritional food. Maybe I am tired and need some rest? Maybe I am bored? etc. There’s usually some uncomfortable feeling behind the craving.
And that’s it, I had an intrusive thought, I acknowledged it, I dismissed it, done.
So that’s the main difference in my recovery now as oppose to previous attempts.
I also eat more of proper food. When I don’t eat lots of chocolate, crisps and other junk I must eat something else instead, and that’s food rich in nutritions. It’s been “only” two weeks, but I can already taste the difference in food, mainly in fruits and vegetables. They’re sweeter and more tasty. The other day I realised that I was craving an orange 
That never happened before, I was never craving any fruit 
I am happy with my discoveries:
- Not every thought is necessarily ME.
- I don’t have to follow and action all my thoughts.
- Some thoughts are just passing by without the need of assigning to them a deep meaning.
8 Likes
@Jana1988 congrats on 2 weeks 
80 days no takeaways.
76 days no ice cream.
19 days no sugar.
4 days no crisps, no binge-eating.
I did not fall asleep until 3am this morning. I went to the shop last night and bought some more meals, plus all the fruit I usually buy in the mornings. I ate a meal, and after that I had the urge to eat more and more, but I didn’t, the fruit etc was still all there this morning. Relief.
🩵
8 Likes
@Jana1988 Mega-Congrats on two weeks! Yeah! And I absolutely think you are right about willpower. There are day-to-day-situations where willpower is needed. But it is like muscle. You can contract a muscle intensly for a short while, you can also train it to get stronger, but you cannot keep your muscle contracted all the time. Otherwise this would be a spasm. We can’t run on spasms.
Your journey looks like you are rocking it! And I also realized after a while of not eating junk: I actually prefer real food. When I am at some gathering where there is tons of junk, I usually bring my own food cause I really do not want to eat that crap. It usually tastes atrocious and never gives me satisfaction.
Keep rocking!
@CATMANCAM Glad to hear you are reaping the benefits of a binge free evening/night.
311 sugar
175 UPF
49 gluten
49 dairy
7 Likes
Day 1386 : No binge today.
@Jana1988 Yay! Congratulations on 2 weeks, keep it up! Your progress is amazing so far as well! 
5 Likes
@acromouse thank you and I’m gonna go ahead and say congrats on 50 days no gluten or dairy
81 days no takeaways.
77 days no ice cream.
20 days no sugar.
5 days no crisps, no binge-eating.
I fell asleep fairly early, I’d already been to the shop to get fruit for this morning at 16:30 yesterday, so when I woke up at 10pm, I did eat some strawberries and felt shame over it. I know this shame is irrational, but it was there.
I know it’s cliché, but in my head I’m allowing myself trips to the shop “for the rest of the month”, so today (I’ve been already) and tomorrow (I’ll go tomorrow rather than tonight I think).
🩵
6 Likes
@CATMANCAM You are definitely ahead of my time 
Thanks! Good to see you on day 5 binge-free.
312 sugar
176 UPF
50 gluten
50 dairy
There is some part of me that is radically against me eating mindfully. I suspect it is afraid of some kind of restriction. I’ll keep investigating.
8 Likes
Day 1387 : No binge today.
5 Likes
313 sugar
177 UPF
51 gluten
51 dairy
5 Likes
82 days no takeaways.
78 days no ice cream.
21 days no sugar.
6 days no crisps, no binge-eating.
In half a day it will be one week. I am so determined of this that I again bought a vape last night. I did try two really long meditations beforehand and I was hoping I’d fall asleep, but instead I was awake until 2am and woke at 4:20am. Because I was awake so late, I was also hungry, so I ate a meal at 1am, I know a meal is not a binge, but I still feel angry at myself over it.
I’ve just had my phonecall with the cessation nurse and she wasn’t horrible to me. I will also discuss in therapy today. I know I don’t want to vape, it’s definitely not the answer.
🩵
7 Likes
You can do this!!!
2 Likes
Day 1388 : No binge today.
4 Likes
17 days no binge
A day before yesterday I did a big bike ride (like every Sunday). These super active days are always the worst for me in terms of controlling myself in eating because I burn so many calories that I basically constantly hungry. I managed well but I had a small piece of chocolate in the evening and yesterday (perhaps to continue the bad habit) I gave in to cravings for something sweet in the evening again and had a handful of biscuits and an ice-cream. However, even though I broke my “1 sweet food a day” rule, I didn’t binge on the sweets and had for once reasonable amount 
I hope that today I will not experience such strong cravings and will be able to stay on my path following my rules. I’ll have to observe my urges and feelings next time when I do something energy demanding and see if I indeed can apot a pattern. Like that I’ll at least know how sport influences my eating and goals.
Wishing everyone to have a lovely start to the new month 
Happy 1st October!! 
5 Likes
83 days no takeaways.
79 days no ice cream.
22 days no sugar.
7 days no crisps, no binge-eating.
Today is the first day of not going to the shop to buy everything I’ve been buying everyday. It’s already difficult and I’m craving to vape, but I’m not going to. I don’t want that addiction back in my life.
🩵
4 Likes