@CATMANCAM I hope the oats and your appointment at the ed clinic will help you @Bomdhil Chocolates are extremely difficult to ressist. @Jana1988 Big win on the grapes vs sweets
Tummy bug still there. I ate more yesterday as I was feeling better and Iām hungry. Now the symptoms have worsened. I hope this settles soon.
Had a sugar eating dream. The first one I remember since starting my abstinence. In the end of the dream I realised the food was infested with some kind of bugs and I had to throw it away. Weird stuff a mind can come up with.
So Iāve got two weeks of no overeating courtesy of my tummy bug Honestly I still feel nausea and some pain once in a while but I am feeling good otherwise so I assume this just takes some more time.
Apart from the fact that this tummy thing brought my counters up, it has helped me to explore the difference between overeating and feeling full after a meal where I ate a lot cause I was/am hungry. I already in these past months discovered a difference between bingeing and overeating.
Now feeling very full can be consequence of overeating where I am using food as a coping strategy. But I can also feel full cause I ate late. I can feel full cause I have gone for quite some time with reduced food like now during this illness. I can also feel full cause Iāve gone hungry for a while and now I want to make up for that.
So I feel like there are some nuances here I want to explore. This is not a black/white show.
@Jana1988 congrats on choosing the healthy option @acromouse thank you that dream sounds horrifying! congrats on 2 weeks no overeating/binge
4 days no takeaways.
0 days for everything else.
Checking-in with yesterdayās numbersā¦
Depression. Shame. Canāt find much more to say than that right now. Not feeling well, my diabetes is not under control, there is glucose in my urine, and I havenāt even eaten that much sugar, awaiting a phonecall from my doctor today.
5 days no takeaways.
1 day no sugar, no crisps, no binge-eating.
Still waiting for my doctorās phonecall. I decided to take an extra tablet of my diabetes medication earlier and my urine is now testing clear from glucose.
Iāve spent the whole day catching-up here.
I should go out for a walk but Iāve just got no energy, plus it will be even less likely that Iād have signal when a doctor does call.
Iāve got the urge to binge, of course I have, but I know I donāt want to, so it is meditation time.
@Bomdhil Congrats on your day without chocolate! @CATMANCAM Hold on there friend. Remind yourself that life can and will be different. I know itās hard. When Iām in a mood I canāt imagine it to change. We are ridiculous creatures like that.
I guess I am past pms time as I am feeling much less obsessed with sugary or heavy food. My husband did a Costco trip, so there is tempting food in the house, but have been eating it normally so far. I wish I could bottle this ability to moderate that I have sometimes so I could bust it out when I am struggling.
@acromouse yes, impermanence. I am reading a book called Wabi-Sabi at the moment, and it speaks a lot about this. Thank you @Misokatsu thank you. Iām glad to read that you are doing well atm
6 days no takeaways.
2 days no sugar, no crisps, no binge-eating
Iāve been awake since 23:30 last night. It is now 18:50 on Saturday evening where I am. I have a migraine and feel dizzy and nauseous, even worse when I stand up, my vision is also blurry. I havenāt been for my walk this week so far. Being hard on myself about that, because I was doing well for a beat. Stopping even for a day sends me right back off track.
I checked the ingredients of the āoatsā and it is 100% gluten-free oat flour. Iām mixing it in a bowl with cold water, then microwaving for 90 seconds, then stirring loads because it just turns into one big clump. Itās edible but I think I also should mix it up a bit and have some of my meal replacement products to ensure Iām getting enough vitamins and minerals. So far, I havenāt managed to persuade myself to opt for them though, I also donāt have many left. I might pick up some multi-vitamins from the supermarket on Monday.
Itās craving time again, so Iāll do some meditations then catch-up on the main thread if my eyes will focus for it.
FFS, idk what happens but sometimes a craving is so strong itās almost like I dissociate and before I know it Iāve ordered something. Then, while Iām waiting for it, my logical mind becomes aware and doesnāt want it, I try to cancel it but it never lets me, I think of the weight-gain consequence, and how I feel afterwards (right now).
I really hate this. I thought the oats were going to keep me safe from myself, and now I feel like Iāve got 50kg of oat flour in my spare room for nothing.
@Misokatsu Hormonal changes during the cycle have a great impact on my cravings as well. At the beginning of my cycle I eat far less, am satisfied far earlier and donāt crave stuff. Towards the end this turns completely: lots of cravings, especially in the afternoon, and a deep need for high calorie foods. Itās a bit of a minefield. @CATMANCAM Keep on trying friend. This is a long process. We are here for you. @Bomdhil Keep up the streak.
Ah guys, needing a little love today. Just like some of youse have recently described, had a little black out binge earlier on chocolate and crisps before I even knew what happened. Itās been a while since I slipped up like that.
Iām having a stressful/challenging weekend socially emotionally and work wise plus my upping my carbs in general throwing things off a bit. Caught myself and will just go on w the day like normal. But yeah, it happens.
Honestly I still feel nausea and some pain once in a while but I am feeling good otherwise so I assume this just takes some more time.
congrats on 2 weeks no overeating/binge 
overload
I thought the oats were going to keep me safe from myself, and now I feel like Iāve got 50kg of oat flour in my spare room for nothing.
. Day 2 no binging
so nice of you!