Hi guys
When im hurting i remind myself of the life i was living when i s tting high
I new hear been clean and sober for 150days. Iām coming off a 15yr drug habit that included crack smack pot pills shrooms lsd ketamine juice and anything else I could get my hands on (Iām Australian sorry if my lingo trips a bit ) Iām 27 years old I have 2 kids to two de facto Iām best friends with my eldest daughters mum but Iām running really rough ATM due to my youngest daughters mum and I have just split about 4 weeks ago. we were both heavy users but have been battling sobriety together but the love and support has dropped since the split. She no longer feels that she can love me the same way that I her and she believes I deserve better all Iāve been doing for the past year is trying to better my self for the sake of my children and our family. I can not just forget the things we have been through together, the good and the bad . I can not move on as she feels thatās what I should do . I have no interest in moving on anytime soon, Iām getting my head right before attempting to think about that. Tho she has already began living the life that she wants while I struggle mentally ATM I have a terrible pokies addiction and am very lonely as I battle bipolar and depression. I just donāt have the ear to lean on or have the distractions of being in a relationship anymore which leaves me very bored and depressed at times so to fill in time I gamble. I win most times but for the fact that I go there to fill in time I donāt leave I canāt leave I just play and play until all the winnings is back in there or the place closes. It is becoming very overwhelming at times when I do get made to leave or have no money left I start hating myself and feel as if Iām doing these sorts of things and my family is falling apart yet again. Even after the huge change Iāve made in myself Iām still loosing things in life I would of lost in active addiction. Which makes me think at times why Iām even clean or why am I even bothering to stick around in this world. And as I beat myself up about that sort of shit every day I feel myself heading closer and closer to one bad decision whether it be using a substance or ending my life if I do one the other follows anyway. I really donāt know ATM , sorry for the random rant in this. Just really needed to get some of that off my chest . Sick of sitting in silence,
I have been clean for 17 months now clean from everything my addiction started with my cancer and continued for the next 7 years I was doing anything to get high everything except prostituionā¦ It feels amazing to be ran I feel like a new person still after 17 months Iām still doing it days by day week by week month by month and even seconds by seconds!!! It always helps to have as many support systems as possible so me downloading this gives me a whole lot of support systems it goes both ways if anyone needs me I am here always 24/7!! Lots of love and support from Toledo, Ohio USA!!! Stay strongā¦
Day 68 never thought I would ever be clean
I have family issues while Iām trying to quite alcoholā¦how can I avoid the urges with all this pressure?
Thanking God for my clean time and the courage to change. Tomorrow I will be clean for 60 days, the longest Iāve been clean and sober in 20 years. I am so great full. Stay strong fellow addicts. 
So Iām 24days sober and my fiance is trying to get clean alsoā¦but we detox diffā¦he is have trouble doing it himself and he needs rehabā¦I have a 6yr old boy that has an awesome life who is clueless and innocent to it allā¦saying daddy will be going all way work for 21daysā¦heās never been in rehab before we always detox ed ourselves but this time itās just harder for himā¦I kno he needs to go but Iām so scared too. We have gone 1 day without talking in 10.5 yrs. We havenāt spent more than 3 days away from each other in 10.5 yrs. We are very much in love and each otherās best friendā¦so saying all that Iām terrified to be alone esp only 24 days cleanā¦making it work with one pay ck work schedule my sonās school schedule and making sure someone can be with my son when Iām notā¦just stressing!! I have GOOD friends who are down to helpā¦but itās not the same as having my fiance aroundā¦I kno heās going for good reason just still sucksā¦I feel like a peice of me will be missing while heās away!
I fall back I was upvto 9 days in beyond drunk I failed again
Checking in ! Start my 4th sober dayand plan to go ahead! Have an amazing sober day! Just for todayš
Today is good I have the choice today. I never thought being sober 11 months and 22 days was ever going to happen.
Thanks to the developers for such an awesome app. Iāve just joined a moment ago, and am a few hours from completing my fifth day. 
first day is big! working on 20 dys here. 
Hi
Hi
Anxiety is piling onā¦almost 26 days clean and just got the call for a bed a rehab for my fiance. So I will be on my own for the first time in 10.5 yrs and I have a 6yr old and a full time job. Nervous as fuck but anxious bc this is such a big change and it will be worth it in the long haul. I love my Michael and I kno he can get thisā¦stay positive! Wish me luck!
Question about loved one:
my sister never has money though she has a good job and few bills. She drinks and smokes weed but I suspect something more because of the lack of money and once I found her on the floor in the bathroom but she wasnāt drunk. Sometimes when she āsleepsā she holds a cell phone in midair. Also once I found a small clear baggy too small for pot. What could it be? What should I look for? She maintains a full time job at a bank
Itās Friday night and I made it to day 6 after a relapse last weekend. Spent today being as productive as I could and ate a big ice cream sandwich afterwards. Feeling good and sending everyone good vibesā¤
H Iām new