Checking in day 279.95
Had a nice day. Went to Wayside and had a counselling session which is always nice. Got to see my picture in the newspaper with some friends and staff which is kinda cool whenever something like that happens, it’s a rare opportunity in my experience, and for a great cause of raising money and awareness for addiction support. Hard to believe that I’ve gone from homeless addict, broken in body, mind and spirit, to where I am now. Its been a hard road to travel but its it’s getting better and that’s what it’s all about. Gives me hope and I want to be able to spread that as much as I can. I’m going to keep doing what I can so that means, pray, attend meetings do the readings, work the 12 steps, volunteer and love yourself, family and friends. I did all those things today and God willing I’ll do them tomorrow.
God bless you all. 
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Checking in day 4. Thankful to be sober and present walking this path with everyone here. Having such a supportive community is a true blessing 
Life continues to be very stressful both personal and professional. I considered cutting back on meetings but I need them. I don’t know if it’s the meetings I need or the people at the meetings. I’m nervous to let up on recovery while going through some pretty tough shit even though I haven’t had any urges.
Reading each and every post on this thread gives me strength every single day. Thank you all for being here and allowing me to be a part of your lives.
Way to go Lisa!! That is a really cool even number. Seems like a lot of us are stressed around here. I heard you can can blame it on the planets. For me and probably a lot of people it’s the upcoming election. And then there’s also a pandemic. I can’t believe we are all as sober as we are. Keep rockin it. I will too. So glad your here.
Thank you Eric! You’re right, it’s probably a little bit of everything. Hopefully, next month, we’ll all start feeling better.
I hate to be a Debbie Downer but I’m thinking spring 
We can do it!!
@Jennajen Welcome back. I’m so sorry you’re struggling right now. I hope that having the blood work done will help reveal something they can help with.
@Olivia I love that picture! So much snow!
@Rockstar24777 I know it’s hard to confront people, but you’re right about the boundaries. The interesting thing about setting boundaries is that once you do, and once people realize you won’t be pushed past them, then they’ll generally respect that. Your time is money, and if it’s something you do for money then you should be paid for it if you’re putting a lot of time and effort into it. You’re not messing your entire brand new life up. Don’t worry. Sometimes there are ups and sometimes there are downs, but that’s normal. Just ride the wave of life until it goes back up again. It always does.
@Brella You’re doing good! Four days is four more than you had before. I’m glad you have such a supportive SO.
@CATMANCAM I know the desire to just stop something so you can start a new life, but with benzos it really is best to taper. I’m not berating you, but just wanted to say this out of concern for your well being. However, if you’re feeling okay, then you can try to just stay off it. However, it is quite likely that the panic attacks may come back. It sounds like you were being given them for a legitimate reason in that aspect. My personal thought is that it is your body. You get to decide. But you should be aware of possible risks. Also while physical withdrawal generally lasts a couple weeks, there can be a longer lasting emotional component. Do some research, and sure you can talk to your doctor if you think it’s in your best interest, but in the end it should be your choice and since you seem to be doing well, I’d say just go with it.
@Zoozoospetals Congrats on your one week! You’re doing great! Keep it up!
@Lisa07 400 days!! Very very nice! Good job! That’s amazing! 
A year well earned, hats off to you! Congrats on this achievement and thanks for letting us share in your journey and for cheering and inspiring us on ours. You are an asset to this thread. 
Blessings and sobriety!
My deepest condolences on your loss. May her soul rest in peace!
Blessings and sobriety dear!
So true! I struggle for time now. Wtf was I doing drinking? It is a thief of time, not just the drinking, the hangover, the obsessive thoughts…
91 days no booze. Day four no pills. Didn’t “collect my refill” yesterday so none in the house and no chance of any pills in the house for the next week. Abstinence feels so much easy than attempts at moderation. Moderation seems to lead into a maze of possibilities and options and exhausting decisions; abstinence leads to a stop sign where no more thinking is required. Ok, so it’s not necessarily easy to then deal with the emotion or feeling that is making you want to use in that situation, but at least I’m given the chance to face that feeling and learn how to manage it without numbing. On we go…
Day 56 and feel O.K! Sleep has been off really bad lately. So I spend most night reading from the Big book and 12x12.
I am and thank you!!!
Punching bag sounds good!! 
Pls do learn a technique too so you don’t do damage to yourself 
I can somewhat relate to that unrecognised bottled up aggression. I’ve also tried to be nice and co-operative most of my life, nothing wrong with that. As I started therapy I discovered that I had never learnt how to vent as I was not allowed to show my anger growing up. Anger doesn’t just dissolve and disappear, it needs to be dealt with somehow. I couldn’t rebel in my teens so the anger remained within me and morphed into self-hatred. There are other factors, too, obviously things aren’t that straightforward.
So many things to learn… To allow myself to be pissed, recognise why I’m feeling that way and then how to allocate that pissery.
Idk what your story is but keep venting and punching that bag! 
Moved house in just over 24 hours. Completely stuffed but felt good that I didn’t need to reward myself with a drink. Day 32 just about done and dusted.
Day 5 free from Meth. Feel pretty down, can’t believe I lost so much time in this relapse, time spent planning, time spent using, time spent recovering, literally several weeks have passed. I just pray I can scrape back the motivation I managed last time around. There was hope. There may still be hope. I am writing a new morning gratitude list, a morning motivation to read on the daily. Best wishes to you all
That time wasn’t wasted, I’m sure you have learnt a lot from this and it will help you avoid further relapses. Remember, you have to create and develop new coping mechanisms and it takes time. There is always hope, just trust yourself and don’t give up! You can do this!
Day 608
The last couple of days have been pretty stressful work wise, but I’ve managed to keep on top of things throughout the chaos.
Times like these give me a huge amount of gratitude, that I can confront challenges head on and not just survive, but actually excel and be a valuable and reliable member of the team. So thankful that I saw sense when I did. 2 years ago I would shy away from responsibility, and completely go to bits if things went wrong. It was pretty common to find me hiding in the corner sweating out my hangover each morning while everyone else got on with things. No more!!!
Have a great day folks, the weekend is but a few hours away 